I'm the dingooo that ate your baybee!
Let's be Australia
by Anonymous | reply 600 | October 9, 2019 9:59 AM |
I'm that giant spider and that giant snake and that giant lizard and that giant rodent.
by Anonymous | reply 1 | August 2, 2019 12:24 AM |
I'm avocado toast.
by Anonymous | reply 2 | August 2, 2019 12:35 AM |
I’m insatiable bottom Dacre Montgomery, cruising for peen around Melbourne, x
by Anonymous | reply 3 | August 2, 2019 1:18 AM |
I’m insatiable bottom Dacre Montgomery, cruising for peen around Melbourne, x
by Anonymous | reply 4 | August 2, 2019 1:18 AM |
Im Margo Robbie
by Anonymous | reply 6 | August 2, 2019 1:24 AM |
I’m a depressing and racist Chris Lilley series.
by Anonymous | reply 7 | August 2, 2019 1:28 AM |
I'm the puzzling dearth of any real cultural accomplishments in music, film, or theater.
by Anonymous | reply 8 | August 2, 2019 1:29 AM |
I’m the weird way of hanging up on the phone, going “bye” all soft and high-pitched.
by Anonymous | reply 9 | August 2, 2019 1:31 AM |
None of us are the Nazi Andrew Dolt. There's not enough drugs in the world to play that role...
by Anonymous | reply 10 | August 2, 2019 1:32 AM |
The correct line is "A dingo took my baby!"
by Anonymous | reply 11 | August 2, 2019 1:43 AM |
I’m the clueless Americans who have never left their home town, let alone their country, making the same old unfunny comments about a country that they have no hope of visiting.
by Anonymous | reply 12 | August 2, 2019 2:04 AM |
I'm the poisonous snakes!
And even more poisonous spiders, jellyfish, lizards, toads, platypuses, jellyfish, stonefish, octopuses, bees...
by Anonymous | reply 13 | August 2, 2019 4:08 AM |
I’m the unwritten question mark? With which all Australians end every sentence? Whether it’s a question or not?
by Anonymous | reply 14 | August 2, 2019 4:10 AM |
I'm a shrimp on the bahbee....
by Anonymous | reply 15 | August 2, 2019 4:15 AM |
I asked this in another Aussie thread and never got an answer. Can anyone explain the breathy, mewling "bye" when ending a phone call? Even the most deep-voiced men do it.
by Anonymous | reply 16 | August 2, 2019 12:57 PM |
I’m the gay men on every corner, closeted or not
by Anonymous | reply 17 | August 2, 2019 1:30 PM |
I've been to Oz, r12. May I be allowed to make "the same old unfunny comments?'
by Anonymous | reply 18 | August 2, 2019 1:42 PM |
No one in Australia calls them 'shrimps'. We call them prawns. They called them shrimps in those horrid Dundee movies because if they'd have said prawns Americans wouldn't know what he was talking about. No Australian other than Paul Hogan has ever said 'shrimp on the bahbee....'
by Anonymous | reply 19 | August 2, 2019 2:29 PM |
I'm the knife (the other one isn't a knife).
by Anonymous | reply 20 | August 2, 2019 2:33 PM |
I'm the shark that ate Harold Holt *burp*.
by Anonymous | reply 21 | August 2, 2019 2:34 PM |
I'm the bigoted, racist Aussie whom the world ignores because Oz is politically and culturally irrelevant.
by Anonymous | reply 22 | August 2, 2019 2:36 PM |
I'm Australia's health care system that has FREE healthcare for ALL its citizens
by Anonymous | reply 23 | August 2, 2019 2:39 PM |
It's so FREE that its citizens are encouraged to purchased additional PRIVATE HEALTH COVERAGE.
by Anonymous | reply 24 | August 2, 2019 2:41 PM |
r24 learn some facts. You can elect to pay for private health in Australia if you so wish. This gives you treatment in private hospitals and no wait times. In the public system you may have to wait for non life threatening operations and you'll most likely have to share a room. With private health there is no wait time for any procedure and you'll have your own private room in a private hospital. People are encouraged to pay for private health because it lessons some of the financial burden from the government. It is not 'additional' health cover, you'll get the same care in a public hospital for free you will just most probably have to wait for it.
by Anonymous | reply 25 | August 2, 2019 2:49 PM |
I've been to Western Australia so I'm entitled to poo on it!
Not only the dingo took her baby, the white men took our babies too!!!!! Shame shame shame!!!!!
by Anonymous | reply 26 | August 2, 2019 2:50 PM |
#lessens
by Anonymous | reply 27 | August 2, 2019 2:53 PM |
I'm the didgeridoo that was used on a gay porn set.
by Anonymous | reply 28 | August 2, 2019 2:57 PM |
I'm the trendy indoor-outdoor cafe on every street corner, even in regional towns.
by Anonymous | reply 29 | August 2, 2019 2:58 PM |
R25 Paying for supplemental "private health care" also provides a choice of hospitals, doctors and what amounts to a much improved service. Oz's health care system is two-tiered; basic and long waits for those who can't afford better and step right this way superior for those who can.
by Anonymous | reply 30 | August 2, 2019 3:00 PM |
Here we sent boys to Catholic boot camps to have them sexually abused, thousands of them!!!!!!! Such fun!!!!
by Anonymous | reply 31 | August 2, 2019 3:01 PM |
I'll be the meat in the Vegemite sandwich.
by Anonymous | reply 32 | August 2, 2019 3:05 PM |
I'm the criminals everyone is descended from!
by Anonymous | reply 33 | August 2, 2019 3:05 PM |
r33 of course no free settler or immigrant ever set foot in Australia.
by Anonymous | reply 34 | August 2, 2019 3:12 PM |
I’m the skin cancer center in every mini mall - no appointment necessary!
by Anonymous | reply 35 | August 2, 2019 3:13 PM |
It's far better that "basic", R30. People who have private health cover often elect to go public if they have an emergency, because the quality of treatment they're going to get as a public patient is going to be absolutely acceptable. Since in an emergency you don't get to choose your doctor and there's no waiting, the key things people use private cover for don't apply. The State will allow you to do this.
If care were substantially less, people would insist on being admitted to private hospitals. However, the specialists who work in private hospitals also work in the major public teaching hospitals (sharing their days per week around), so if you need a difficult emergency operation you're almost certainly going to be sent to one of those and get a top specialist. (Of course, if you live in the country and not near a major centre, you're going to be stuffed anyway just because of the geography.)
The only real difference between the way the system serves rich and poor, at least in the cities, is the waiting times for elective surgery (eg knee replacements, cataract surgery).
by Anonymous | reply 36 | August 2, 2019 3:14 PM |
What is a mini mall, R35?
by Anonymous | reply 37 | August 2, 2019 3:15 PM |
r36 You are right. However I know of wealthy people who do not have private health and people who struggle to make ends meet who do. It can be a class thing, or it can be just a priority thing.
by Anonymous | reply 38 | August 2, 2019 3:18 PM |
[quote]However, the specialists who work in private hospitals also work in the major public teaching hospitals (sharing their days per week around), so if you need a difficult emergency operation you're almost certainly going to be sent to one of those and get a top specialist
I don't know where you are mate, but it never worked like that in Melbourne. You had supplemental, the specialist had all the time in the world for you. If you didn't, a specialist may - and that's a big MAY - give you 5 min of his time. Actually work on you? Not in Melbourne mate.
by Anonymous | reply 39 | August 2, 2019 3:22 PM |
r39 I too know of specialists who work at both public and private hospitals. Some may not, but some do.
by Anonymous | reply 40 | August 2, 2019 3:24 PM |
This is closer to reality R41:
Too many Australian doctors are splitting their time between public and private hospitals, undermining efficiency and potentially contributing to delays for patients, a health system expert says.
A study of eight groups of specialists found most of them worked in both the public and private systems each week, [bold]and most spent the majority of their time with private patients[/bold].
by Anonymous | reply 42 | August 2, 2019 3:29 PM |
I'm a big hunk of spunk!
by Anonymous | reply 43 | August 2, 2019 3:36 PM |
I'm Peter Allen who still called Australia home though I have an American accent.
by Anonymous | reply 44 | August 2, 2019 4:27 PM |
I'm the budgie that has been smuggle into a fit, young lifesaver's groin.
by Anonymous | reply 45 | August 2, 2019 10:30 PM |
*smuggled!
by Anonymous | reply 46 | August 2, 2019 10:30 PM |
Im the funnel web spider
by Anonymous | reply 47 | August 2, 2019 10:35 PM |
I’m the most racist country in the world
by Anonymous | reply 48 | August 2, 2019 10:44 PM |
I'm the handsome cockatoo!
(I bet you've seen a cock a too!!)
by Anonymous | reply 49 | August 2, 2019 10:58 PM |
I’m the “suburbs” that occupy about 95% of the land area of every city.
by Anonymous | reply 50 | August 3, 2019 12:21 AM |
I’m Bindi Irwin. Armed with a crimping iron and a Ritalin prescription, I’m ready to take the world by storm.
by Anonymous | reply 51 | August 3, 2019 12:55 AM |
Stay in character.
If you want to discuss healthcare in Australia, start your own bloody thread. This is a “Let’s Be...” thread.
by Anonymous | reply 52 | August 3, 2019 1:02 AM |
I'm the token Asian on the every soap opera!
by Anonymous | reply 53 | August 3, 2019 1:06 AM |
I'm the sea that has girt the land.
by Anonymous | reply 54 | August 3, 2019 1:11 AM |
I'm the chicken salt.
by Anonymous | reply 55 | August 3, 2019 1:17 AM |
I'm all the actors who are credited as Aussies but actually born somewhere else.
by Anonymous | reply 56 | August 3, 2019 2:01 AM |
[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]
by Anonymous | reply 57 | August 3, 2019 2:13 AM |
I'm the public image of Australians being wild and sporty as well as the reality of their being quite reserved.
by Anonymous | reply 58 | August 3, 2019 2:17 AM |
I’m a hotel that’s actually just a bar.
by Anonymous | reply 59 | August 3, 2019 2:23 AM |
Hi, I'm Golden Gaytime!
It's hard to have me on your own.
by Anonymous | reply 60 | August 3, 2019 2:29 AM |
I’m the huge, silent, menacing kangaroo loitering with intent. On public crossways. After dark.
by Anonymous | reply 61 | August 3, 2019 2:38 AM |
I'm the Outback Steakhouse that doesn't exist here.
by Anonymous | reply 62 | August 3, 2019 2:46 AM |
We're the names Kylie, Kailee, Kylereigh, Keelee, etc.
If you have one of us, don't bother lying about your age. We all know that you were born before 1978.
by Anonymous | reply 63 | August 3, 2019 3:09 AM |
I'm the alcoholism.
by Anonymous | reply 64 | August 3, 2019 3:12 AM |
R16 I'm an Aussie and I don't recognise what you're generalising about. Do you have a Youtube clip to demonstrate this habit?
R8 We produced Peter Allen and Hugh Jackman, Peter Finch and Errol Flynn.
In terms of serious concert music, I recommend Ross Edwards who's kind of similar to Jon Adams
by Anonymous | reply 65 | August 3, 2019 3:32 AM |
I'm the films about the horrific treatment of Black Fellahs written, produced and directed by White Fellahs.
by Anonymous | reply 66 | August 3, 2019 3:44 AM |
I'm the Tall Poppy Syndrome and the reason why Aussie singers, actors, directors, etc. move to England and the US for fame and fortune.
by Anonymous | reply 67 | August 3, 2019 3:49 AM |
Ok then R19 , I'm another PRAWN chucked on the bahbeee...
by Anonymous | reply 68 | August 3, 2019 4:05 AM |
I’m the sad truth that Australia just isn’t funny.
by Anonymous | reply 71 | August 3, 2019 4:27 AM |
I'm New Zealand. I have nothing important to say. But I belong somewhere in this thread. Right?
by Anonymous | reply 72 | August 3, 2019 4:29 AM |
I am the hot surfer boy that you want in your bed.
by Anonymous | reply 74 | August 3, 2019 4:34 AM |
RUOK R73? https://www.abc.net.au/news/2019-07-28/gundagai-dog-on-tuckerbox-vandalised/11354422
by Anonymous | reply 75 | August 3, 2019 4:40 AM |
I'm an Aussie and we're being discriminated against!
Datalounge has imposed a paywall against us but NOT against the Canadian gossip thread.
We have to pay a fee now and we're being treated like those obsessive ratbags in the Cavill and C.m.b.y.n. threads.
by Anonymous | reply 76 | August 3, 2019 5:14 AM |
I'm a refugee being warehoused on Manus Island by Australia.
by Anonymous | reply 77 | August 3, 2019 7:49 AM |
I'm a taxpayer who doesn't like being subjected to Emotional Blackmail by strangers.
These freeloading strangers want me to feed them, clothe them, house them, educate them, medicate them, entertain them, sewer them and police them when we already have too many people in this big desert of a nation.
by Anonymous | reply 78 | August 3, 2019 8:21 AM |
R78 this is R77 - I actually agree with you - I should have signed the post SHY.
by Anonymous | reply 79 | August 3, 2019 8:26 AM |
I'm the yearning to travel the world, because everything is so far away. I'm also the keen interest in celebrities, for much the same reason.
Can I also be the often stuck-in-the-70s home decor?
by Anonymous | reply 80 | August 3, 2019 1:21 PM |
I'm Pauline Hansons bellybutton.
by Anonymous | reply 81 | August 3, 2019 1:36 PM |
I'm Australia in 2050 and I'm nothing but a succession of ghost towns along my coast. I've been mostly abandoned since becoming entirely uninhabitable due to climate collapse.
by Anonymous | reply 82 | August 3, 2019 1:43 PM |
I'm the red back on the toilet seat.
by Anonymous | reply 83 | August 3, 2019 1:47 PM |
I'm the odd marsupial.
by Anonymous | reply 84 | August 3, 2019 1:47 PM |
I'm the store that closes at 5pm.
by Anonymous | reply 85 | August 3, 2019 1:49 PM |
I'm the suburb that you wouldn't walk alone in after 7pm.
by Anonymous | reply 86 | August 3, 2019 1:50 PM |
I'm a map of Tasmania
by Anonymous | reply 87 | August 3, 2019 1:58 PM |
I'm the 'lifestyle' that Australians don't stop talking about but never actually define.
by Anonymous | reply 88 | August 3, 2019 2:13 PM |
I’m an Australian who started a personal training business in L.A.
Americans are desperate for attention and love accents!
by Anonymous | reply 89 | August 3, 2019 2:20 PM |
I'm the Prime Minister that changes every 18 months.
by Anonymous | reply 90 | August 3, 2019 2:41 PM |
I'm the three slabs of VB, 4 wine casks and esky full of more beer/wine carried by two yabbos to knock back in celebration of Oz Day.
by Anonymous | reply 91 | August 3, 2019 2:48 PM |
[quote]I'm the Outback Steakhouse that doesn't exist here.
Outback is the only authentic Australian food in America!
by Anonymous | reply 92 | August 3, 2019 6:03 PM |
I'm New Zealand, and I don't apprushiate that our accint guts muxed up with theirs.
by Anonymous | reply 93 | August 3, 2019 6:08 PM |
I’m the current Prime Minister, a devout Christian, and I worship every Sunday in a mega -church where everybody sings and dances. My Christian views extend to showing no compassion to the refugees being warehoused on the islands surrounding Australia and refusing to vote in the same-sex marriage plebiscite.
by Anonymous | reply 94 | August 3, 2019 11:12 PM |
I'm the Queen. Do I have a role here?
by Anonymous | reply 96 | August 3, 2019 11:44 PM |
R96 Yes dear, you are meant to run the place, and frankly we would all be better off if you took a more hands on approach (I think?)
by Anonymous | reply 97 | August 3, 2019 11:48 PM |
I’m the miss fisher mystery series that was a dustier version of PBS’ Mystery series.
by Anonymous | reply 98 | August 3, 2019 11:50 PM |
R57 hilarious and spot on
by Anonymous | reply 99 | August 4, 2019 1:50 AM |
I'm Scott Morrison and I've only been in office for less than a year and I'm wondering who you (at R96) are so angry and intolerant.
Have you suffered in any way because of me?
by Anonymous | reply 100 | August 4, 2019 2:16 AM |
I am Princess Michael. I grew up here, above my mother's hair salon.
by Anonymous | reply 101 | August 4, 2019 2:19 AM |
I'm the complainer at R8.
I admit I hadn't realised that I shouldn't judge the small cultural output of all those non-European countries around the world. They haven't yet had the time or population to sustain and nurture culture the way that Europe has.
by Anonymous | reply 102 | August 4, 2019 2:32 AM |
Actually I'm r8. Why are you pretending to be another poster you weirdo?
by Anonymous | reply 103 | August 4, 2019 2:56 AM |
I'm the person wondering why R8 is so puzzled that a new nation like Australia has such 'a dearth of cultural accomplishments'.
by Anonymous | reply 104 | August 4, 2019 3:25 AM |
I am the best Thai food in the world, including Thailand.
by Anonymous | reply 105 | August 4, 2019 5:20 AM |
R65 - Peter Finch was British.
by Anonymous | reply 106 | August 4, 2019 6:08 AM |
R106 The late Peter Finch was as Australian as whatever you believe you are.
by Anonymous | reply 107 | August 4, 2019 6:13 AM |
R66 There will be LOTS of sentiment and handwringing in this film.
There will also be LOTS and LOTS of over-dramatised speculation because there's a dearth of documentary evidence (and hardly any to justify the horror you feel R66).
All the actors will be mixed-race biracial in order to make it more empathetic to bring in the customers. And it will be highly subsidised by the taxpayers (just like the Bangara Dance Theatre 85% of whose audience is made up of public servants surreptitiously given free tickets over the last ten years).
by Anonymous | reply 108 | August 4, 2019 6:30 AM |
Dinky Dies Born Elsewhere:
Guy Pearce (England)
Mel Gibson (US)
Peter Finch (England)
Keith Urban (New Zealand)
Naomi Watts (England)
Russell Crowe (New Zealand)
Sophie Monk (England)
Sam Worthington (England)
Isla Fisher (Oman/England)
PM Julia Gillard (Wales)
John Farnham (England)
Derryn Hinch (New Zealand)
John Waters (England)
Hugo Weaving (Nigeria/England)
(Nicole Kidman was born in Honolulu to Aussie parents)
by Anonymous | reply 109 | August 4, 2019 6:33 AM |
R108 Wasn't your mob that was stolen from their families and shipped off to be raised White, was it White Fellah?
by Anonymous | reply 110 | August 4, 2019 6:36 AM |
I am the Tim-Tams.
by Anonymous | reply 111 | August 4, 2019 6:49 AM |
I am the Cherry Ripes, Violet Crumbles and One with the Lot.
by Anonymous | reply 112 | August 4, 2019 6:58 AM |
R110. I'd prefer to be raised by foster parents instead of being raped by my father.
by Anonymous | reply 113 | August 4, 2019 7:39 AM |
I'm Porpoise Spit and I've never recovered from Muriel and Rhonda abandoning me like that. I don't want that cunt Tanya. Why won't any other town have her?
by Anonymous | reply 114 | August 4, 2019 7:52 AM |
R113 so having read that article it seems most of their problems having nothing to do with white man!
by Anonymous | reply 115 | August 4, 2019 8:29 AM |
I'm Ava Gardner commenting that she came to the end of the earth to make a movie about the end of the world.
by Anonymous | reply 116 | August 4, 2019 9:13 AM |
I'm the militantly ignorant population.
by Anonymous | reply 117 | August 4, 2019 9:15 AM |
r116 She was talking about Melbourne, and she's right. And I'm an Australian.
by Anonymous | reply 118 | August 4, 2019 9:16 AM |
r117 Ignorance is the average American who doesn't know where Australia is. Then again, Bush jnr did call it Austria.
by Anonymous | reply 119 | August 4, 2019 9:17 AM |
I'm Ann Miller, the first Hollywood movie star to visit the country.
by Anonymous | reply 120 | August 4, 2019 9:19 AM |
I’m the one pavlova to rule them all.
by Anonymous | reply 121 | August 4, 2019 9:20 AM |
The Yanks soldiers in Melbourne during WW2 described it as "Half the size of a New York cemetery and twice as dead".
R113 R115 Learn something.
by Anonymous | reply 122 | August 4, 2019 9:22 AM |
I'm Mel Bourne. I worked for Woody Allen.
by Anonymous | reply 123 | August 4, 2019 9:24 AM |
I’m the horrific treatment of the Aboriginal people that still continues today
by Anonymous | reply 124 | August 4, 2019 11:40 AM |
I'm the great kindness shown to my 92 year old mother when she last visited Australia. She loves to meet new people, but as her hearing isn't the best conversation is difficult. No one was impatient, no one looked bored, people helped without lessening her dignity.
by Anonymous | reply 125 | August 4, 2019 11:42 AM |
nice to hear r125
by Anonymous | reply 126 | August 4, 2019 11:46 AM |
Thankyou r125 . We're not all the uncultured savages everyone else here will have you think.
by Anonymous | reply 127 | August 4, 2019 12:00 PM |
I'm the Hills Hoist rotary clothesline in nearly every suburban backyard:
by Anonymous | reply 128 | August 4, 2019 12:04 PM |
I'm the little factoid I learned yesterday, that Savannah Guthrie was born in Australia.
by Anonymous | reply 129 | August 4, 2019 12:13 PM |
I’m the cute Aussie Gay boy’s sense of self-deprecating humour.
by Anonymous | reply 130 | August 4, 2019 12:18 PM |
Unlike America, or other British Colonies at the time, Australia NEVER had slaves. Arthur Phillip was told he was not to put the aboriginal people into slavery and while he was governor the relationship between that of the government and the aboriginal people was quite cordial. It was the free settlers who fought and massacred native Australians, not the government.
The government removal of aboriginal children, while in hindsight was the wrong thing to do, was at the time thought to be the best course of action. The oftentimes squalid and poor conditions in which some of these children lived, coupled with the complete absence of education and healthcare was deemed enough for their removal. The government believed it was acting in good faith and in a lot of circumstances it was.
Prime Minister Kevin Rudd formally apologised to the aboriginal people for past atrocities and for the last forty plus years the government has allocated funds to every aboriginal person in Australia via a government pension scheme regardless of age or asset, a pension no white person is allocated. The government financially assists in the health care and education of aboriginal people. even obtaining low-cost housing and interest-free home loans.
What you're not told is that a lot (but by no means all) aboriginal people refuse to send their children to school and refuse to seek healthcare. Domestic violence, sexual assault and drug and alcohol abuse is rife amongst aboriginal communities. Despite financial assistance and social welfare a lot of aboriginal people choose to live destitute, self-destructive and abusive lives.
The problem has always been white man trying to persuade, or force, the aboriginal people to live like Europeans. This has never worked and never will. Perhaps it would have been better to leave them to their own devices and live the way they had always lived.
by Anonymous | reply 131 | August 4, 2019 12:29 PM |
I am 90 percent of the country that is uninhabitable.
by Anonymous | reply 132 | August 4, 2019 12:38 PM |
I'll do bareback in the outback.
by Anonymous | reply 133 | August 4, 2019 1:57 PM |
I'm the sensible gun reform that got enacted after the Port Arthur Massacre.
by Anonymous | reply 134 | August 4, 2019 2:09 PM |
I'm the mattress that John Jarratt fucked his female flatmate who, whom she later claimed he'd rapped her. It we to trial and John rightfully got off.
by Anonymous | reply 135 | August 4, 2019 2:22 PM |
I’m an ANZAC biscuit. Not sure why.
by Anonymous | reply 136 | August 4, 2019 2:25 PM |
I'm Ayers Rock that I climbed up before they changed the name of it and banned tourists from the top.
They had metal plaques screwed into the rock along the trail up the side commemorating people who had fallen to their deaths. It was exhilarating!
by Anonymous | reply 137 | August 4, 2019 2:58 PM |
R136 I'm Vegemite and I'm equally confused.
by Anonymous | reply 138 | August 4, 2019 3:10 PM |
I'm the New Zealander who is pacing furiously because someone mistook him for an Australian and he can't understand why.
by Anonymous | reply 139 | August 4, 2019 3:14 PM |
I'm Foreign Minister Marise Payne.
I used to be Defense Minister but they kept confusing me with the RAN's ships.
When I was in Parliament I needed two chairs and a Travellator to get up and out of the Senate Chamber and was too large to sit in Business Class.
by Anonymous | reply 140 | August 4, 2019 3:40 PM |
I’m the turn indicator and windshield-wiper stalks that are mounted on opposite sides from most of the rest of the world, so even British tourists get us wrong.
by Anonymous | reply 141 | August 4, 2019 6:22 PM |
I'm the professional wrestler who does mild porn for charity.
I live in that little town on the west side which has the BEST climate in the world.
I may be taking the body issue too far; not everyone wants a body which looks like some beast from 'GoT'.
by Anonymous | reply 142 | August 4, 2019 6:54 PM |
I'm the house hunter that wants a place with three "beadrooms."
by Anonymous | reply 143 | August 4, 2019 7:18 PM |
I'm the raise-up-lights every good Aussie uses for shaving.
by Anonymous | reply 144 | August 4, 2019 7:21 PM |
I'm the heaps of sand in the outback.
by Anonymous | reply 145 | August 4, 2019 7:22 PM |
I’m a fair and equitable universal healthcare system for all. I’m gun control that has halted all mass shootings since implemented two decades ago.
But you Americans wouldn’t know what those are.
by Anonymous | reply 146 | August 4, 2019 9:11 PM |
I'm a small pile of ash which is all that's left from Margot Robbie's original birth certificate .
by Anonymous | reply 147 | August 4, 2019 9:19 PM |
I'm Australia, a British colony in the 19th century.
I'm Australia, an American colony in the 20th century.
I'm Australia, a Chinese colony in the 21st century.
by Anonymous | reply 148 | August 4, 2019 10:39 PM |
I’m a fly. I’ll always be with you. You will never be rid of me. Because I’m a fly. I will annoy you half to death. Wave me away and I’ll be back in 5 seconds, for I am a fly. Wear a stupid hat with corks on it and it won’t deter me at all. I’m a fly. I’m a fly. I’m a fly. I’m a fly. I’m a fly.
by Anonymous | reply 149 | August 4, 2019 10:51 PM |
I'm lying Carnita Matthews' burka.
I don't wear it is prison.
by Anonymous | reply 151 | August 4, 2019 10:59 PM |
I am the more than thousand humans who died because Julia Gillard said she would open her heart to strangers.
by Anonymous | reply 153 | August 4, 2019 11:10 PM |
I'm the rather crass and boorish sense of humor frequently exhibited by Aussies living and working in the US that Americans "just don't get."
by Anonymous | reply 154 | August 4, 2019 11:29 PM |
I'm one of the Lamingtons many love to devour. Please, don't eat me mate!
by Anonymous | reply 156 | August 5, 2019 12:08 AM |
What a stupid name for a cookie!
by Anonymous | reply 157 | August 5, 2019 12:18 AM |
Oh how sad you feel like that R158, more for me then! Australian licorice is the best. Some of the oldest and most natural manufacturers left Britain for Australia. Great memories of Australian friends bringing licorice back to me in Britain. Warning: many contain flour, or the dreaded gluten.... Still delightfultful if you do not suffer celiac disease.
by Anonymous | reply 159 | August 5, 2019 12:25 AM |
The licorice flavor isn't that bad if you like licorice, but I remember so many of their flavors tasted a bit off: the gasoline flavor, the fluoride rinse flavor, the vaguely fruit flavor - all had strange aftertastes. Noticeably so.
by Anonymous | reply 160 | August 5, 2019 12:29 AM |
R160 Well, there is that to be sure with other candies, and drinks. I should include to my warning that the real licorice can raise BP too. I'm not quite sure how much one would need to eat to cause serious problems, but much of what passes as licorice in much of the world is synthetic like those off flavours you mention.
by Anonymous | reply 161 | August 5, 2019 12:34 AM |
I'm the sheep, that live in fear of oversexed Aussies.
by Anonymous | reply 162 | August 5, 2019 12:41 AM |
I'm Joan Sutherland, born in Sydney.
by Anonymous | reply 163 | August 5, 2019 6:14 AM |
[quote]But you Americans wouldn’t know what those are.
We would if we had your population, cockie.
by Anonymous | reply 164 | August 5, 2019 6:19 AM |
I'm "no" somehow spoken with two syllables.
by Anonymous | reply 165 | August 5, 2019 6:24 AM |
I'm Johnny O'Keefe - Australia's first rock star?
by Anonymous | reply 166 | August 5, 2019 6:24 AM |
I'm the Australian Salute, used incessantly in a totally futile attempt to get rid of R149.
by Anonymous | reply 167 | August 5, 2019 6:25 AM |
I'm the Trans-Tasman Agreement, which allowed 20% of New Zealand to migrate to Australia for better benefits and weather.
by Anonymous | reply 169 | August 5, 2019 6:40 AM |
I'm the Sydney Gay Madi Gras.
by Anonymous | reply 170 | August 5, 2019 2:09 PM |
I'm the random Australian guys itching to move to LA to become a star.
by Anonymous | reply 171 | August 5, 2019 2:41 PM |
I'm the tick that burrowed into Pauline Hanson's cheek just prior to the last federal election.
by Anonymous | reply 172 | August 6, 2019 12:04 AM |
I'm Mick Tay-lah! Nice to meetcha!!!
by Anonymous | reply 173 | August 6, 2019 12:12 AM |
I'm a dentist but my face cannot be shown on TV.
by Anonymous | reply 174 | August 6, 2019 8:29 AM |
I'm a Holden Commodore Sportwagon...continually underestimated.
by Anonymous | reply 175 | August 6, 2019 8:45 AM |
I'm Ja'mie, star of a very funny Aus sitcom Summer Heights High.
by Anonymous | reply 176 | August 6, 2019 9:26 AM |
I'm Evie Amati.
I sprang to fame after I took an axe and started hacking at strangers two years ago.
But now after two years in prison I have decided to reclaim my penis.
by Anonymous | reply 177 | August 6, 2019 10:58 AM |
I'm Germaine Greer. I want to be considered an intellectual but I'll stoop to doing Celebrity Big Brother.
by Anonymous | reply 179 | August 6, 2019 11:37 AM |
I told you Australia isn’t funny.
by Anonymous | reply 180 | August 6, 2019 11:38 AM |
R179 I know Germaine is an easy target but she can be very witty sometimes. One night on Q&A Julie Bishop proclaimed that she 'wasn't an animal'. Germaine drolly asked her "Well what are you dear? Vegetable or mineral?"
by Anonymous | reply 181 | August 6, 2019 2:11 PM |
R179 Germaine is an easy target for 21st century bitches but she's an important international figure in 20th century history. She also prophesied a lot of fundamental things which are too serious to discuss in a flippant, trivialising place like Datalounge.
by Anonymous | reply 182 | August 6, 2019 6:39 PM |
I'm the 2020 renewable energy target they're going to meet despite the deplorable Abbott government's best efforts to thwart it.
by Anonymous | reply 183 | August 6, 2019 6:54 PM |
I'm the Australian idiot who bleats about Climate Change while driving a car and getting a half-garbage-bin's worth of plastic packaging each time I go to Coles and Woollies.
by Anonymous | reply 184 | August 6, 2019 10:12 PM |
R170 I'm the young hustler who wants to drop "gay and lesbian" from the name of the Sydney Mardi Gras Parade.
I want it to be a bigger money-spinner and it's already 70% heterosexual now.
by Anonymous | reply 185 | August 6, 2019 10:34 PM |
G’day.
by Anonymous | reply 186 | August 6, 2019 10:44 PM |
How yer going, darl?
by Anonymous | reply 187 | August 7, 2019 5:57 AM |
I'm a bogan, and I am proud about it for no reason whatsoever!
by Anonymous | reply 188 | August 7, 2019 7:06 AM |
I'm a modern Australian and I refuse to join the current fashion for self-hatred.
by Anonymous | reply 189 | August 7, 2019 7:23 AM |
I'm Norman Gunston, considered a funny character in the 1970s.
by Anonymous | reply 190 | August 7, 2019 8:36 AM |
I'm Molly Meldrum. I finally came out after my career tanked and it wouldn't matter.
by Anonymous | reply 191 | August 7, 2019 11:12 AM |
Oi'm Miss Ginar Liano from Melbun, and you're an insignificant ass hair.
by Anonymous | reply 192 | August 7, 2019 3:10 PM |
I'm Flo Bjelke-Petersen's recipe for Pumpkin Scones.
by Anonymous | reply 194 | August 7, 2019 3:23 PM |
I’m a gorgeous Australian bachelor of a certain age, and endowed with singing and performing talent, that has taken me everywhere, including the Big Apple:
by Anonymous | reply 196 | August 7, 2019 10:32 PM |
I'm the Sydney Opera House, the 8th wonder of the world.
by Anonymous | reply 197 | August 8, 2019 10:44 AM |
I'm Pauline Hanson's One Nation Orange T-Shirt that she sells. I'm made in China!
by Anonymous | reply 198 | August 8, 2019 1:44 PM |
R197
You look like copulating clams.
by Anonymous | reply 199 | August 9, 2019 12:25 AM |
R199 No, we are the copulating 'cornette'-wearing Daughters of The Charity of St. Vincent de Paul.
by Anonymous | reply 200 | August 9, 2019 12:30 AM |
Do the cornettes copulate, R200, or the nuns?
I'm told the clam reference was Princess Anne's upon first seeing the Opera House as she sailed into Sydney Harbor.
by Anonymous | reply 201 | August 9, 2019 12:48 AM |
Cheers for Germaine Greer! Love her.
I am a judge who really ought to sentence this deranged psychopath axe swinger to life in prison, as we all know this creature - if released - will pick up the axe again.
But it is Australia, so perhaps in six months or so, the Lady of the Axe will be re-unleashed on the Australian public.
by Anonymous | reply 202 | August 9, 2019 1:01 AM |
I'm an Australian who's dismayed by Australian magistrates who say the solution to Australia's gaols (which are overcrowded with thugs and rapists) is to hand out suspended sentences so those thugs and rapists can live out their 'suspended sentences' in our suburbs.
by Anonymous | reply 203 | August 9, 2019 1:06 AM |
I'm Eero Saarinen. My father was a famous architect in Chicago and way back in 1957 I was asked to judge some architecture competition down somewhere at the bottom of the world.
All the entries were very boring but I broke the rules and chose a fellow-Scandinavian to get the prize. The Scandinavian's charcoal sketches looked like something from 'The 'Jetsons' and they were so vague as to be useless.
Anyway I stole the design for my TWA Terminal at JFK Airport. Mine took 5 years to build while the Australians took 16 years to build their opera house.
by Anonymous | reply 204 | August 9, 2019 2:04 AM |
And didn't the Australians persecute/prosecute Jørn Utzon, the architect, for porn or was that planted in his luggage because they didn't like something else about him?
by Anonymous | reply 205 | August 9, 2019 2:09 AM |
I'm Eugene Goossens the Belgian composer/conductor who was hounded out for having porn.
Some say it was gay, but no one really knows. Some say it was 'paganistic' because I consorted with this wacko beatnik
by Anonymous | reply 206 | August 9, 2019 2:16 AM |
I'm all the Australian beef that looks like it's juuust on the brink of being exported to Hollywood, but then returns to the home shores for some unknown reason.
by Anonymous | reply 207 | August 9, 2019 2:25 AM |
I'm the ghost of Coral Browne. I was Vera Charles in the movie and Mrs. Vincent Price in real life.
I was celebrated for my wit. When a giant phallus was unveiled at the climax of Peter Brook’s production of Oedipus, I turned to my companion, Alec Guinness, and inquired: “Is it anyone we know, dear?”
by Anonymous | reply 208 | August 9, 2019 2:30 AM |
I'm the ghost of Coral Browne and I was typecast as a tart bitch from my first films in 46 and 47 with the painfully sugary Anna Neagle.
by Anonymous | reply 209 | August 9, 2019 2:51 AM |
Pay attention to R206, R205.
Utzon was hounded out of Australia for a completely different reason. (That he was taking too long to build the Opera House, and had found himself in the middle of a political shitstorm. This was, in brief, caused by the early death of the Premier who authorised the building, and the ganging up on him of key luvvies of the day, notably the head of the Sydney Symphony Orchestra.)
We never got any of the theatre interiors that Utzon designed. The Drama Theatre looks and behaves like a cinema (a letterbox with no wings) because that's exactly what it was originally supposed to be. I loathe Arts luvvies.
by Anonymous | reply 212 | August 9, 2019 6:16 AM |
I'm the Sydney Harbour Bridge. Hand over $200 and you climb me and freak out at the top from vertigo.
by Anonymous | reply 213 | August 9, 2019 6:26 AM |
I’m a threw for your carch.
by Anonymous | reply 214 | August 9, 2019 6:28 AM |
I'm the tragic last Thylacine. It's heartbreaking to imagine it dying alone.
by Anonymous | reply 215 | August 9, 2019 6:43 AM |
I'm curious about R196.
You talk as though you have achieved some level of intimacy with this singer. Did he 'take' you far? Is he intimate with this other Antipodean singer?
by Anonymous | reply 216 | August 9, 2019 9:13 AM |
[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]
by Anonymous | reply 217 | August 9, 2019 8:10 PM |
I’m a quokka. Some bogans think it’s fun to travel to Rottnest Island and kill cute little me.
by Anonymous | reply 218 | August 9, 2019 9:04 PM |
We are coming for the cats. We will kill all cats in Australia so you better lock up your little Mittens/Tiger/Boo while the cat massacre is going down.
by Anonymous | reply 220 | August 10, 2019 12:45 AM |
^ I don't believe that story for a minute. But Australia can't even be Deadly Serious About Killing the Millions of hideous, poisonous Cane Toads which are munching their way through the North-east part of the continent.
Australia didn't do anything about the Crown of Thorns starfish which have been eating and bleaching the Great Barrier Reef coral since the 1960s. It's only now that some people are squawking that the bleaching is caused by increasing sea temperatures.
by Anonymous | reply 221 | August 10, 2019 12:56 AM |
I'm the picnic at Hanging Rock
by Anonymous | reply 222 | August 10, 2019 12:56 AM |
Yes R221 the NYT is now propagating false news.
I guess Australia news sites aren't in on the hoax.
by Anonymous | reply 223 | August 10, 2019 1:02 AM |
CNN also propagating the cat killing hoax...
by Anonymous | reply 224 | August 10, 2019 1:03 AM |
Even Snopes says it's true: Australia is killing off millions of stray cats! And with poisoned sausages....as well as bullets and crossbows...
by Anonymous | reply 225 | August 10, 2019 1:06 AM |
I don't see how any dog or cat manages to survive in Australia. There's poison bait everywhere, and the poor things are also torn apart by all the hostile creatures that inhabit that country.
by Anonymous | reply 226 | August 10, 2019 1:22 AM |
I hate my countries attitude towards cats - they should a protected species. Watch when they get rid of them all we will have a rat & mice plague.
by Anonymous | reply 227 | August 10, 2019 6:06 AM |
The Victorian government pleaded with cat owners to keep their cats inside because they were killing off the lyrebird population. Its pleas fell on deaf ears, so they quietly started going out and culling cats.
Australia has a long history of mindlessly introducing foreign species with disastrous results. Rabbits were introduced for food and hunting from the First Fleet and became such a pest that several fences, one 3,000 km long north to south, were built in Western Australia to halt their advance. Cane toads were introduced in 1935 to control the cane beetle in Qld sugar plantations. They not only had little to no effect on the cane beetle, they multiplied so quickly that there are now over 200 million of the destructive little buggers spread from NSW to the Northern Territory.
by Anonymous | reply 228 | August 10, 2019 6:28 AM |
R228 The worst species introduced to Australia is the white fella.
by Anonymous | reply 229 | August 10, 2019 6:34 AM |
R229 Too right!
by Anonymous | reply 230 | August 10, 2019 6:39 AM |
[quote]I hate my countries attitude towards cats - they should a protected species.
You do know cats that are allowed to roam free have decimated the bird population around the world, right? Cats are only one species but they're doing untold damage to hundreds of bird species and are pushing them to extinction in some places. The rat and mice population outside can never be managed with cats alone as they're completely ineffective in dealing with them in sufficient numbers.
Keep your fucking cats indoors and there will be no problem. And sterilise them while you're at it. I really admire Australians for dealing with invasive species head-on. One good thing that's come out of their awful federal government.
by Anonymous | reply 231 | August 10, 2019 10:16 AM |
R231 My cats are sterilised (they are all rescue cats) and I live in the fucking inner city of Sydney so I don't let them out of the house for THEIR safety against the biggest threat of all - cat haters. Birds spread disease.
by Anonymous | reply 232 | August 10, 2019 11:13 AM |
R21 I'm the Australian humor when naming a public swimming pool after the late Harold Holt.
by Anonymous | reply 233 | August 10, 2019 12:10 PM |
r5 Isn't the Hawaiian Speedo boy who got kicked out of college for jacking off in one of the lecture halls?
by Anonymous | reply 234 | August 10, 2019 12:14 PM |
I'm the forensic anthropological findings that suggests aborigines were beating up their females before Bad White Fella came along.
by Anonymous | reply 235 | August 10, 2019 12:22 PM |
I'm the shortening of already rather short words - lippie for lipstick, addie for address, etc.
by Anonymous | reply 237 | August 10, 2019 12:56 PM |
"We're taking the kiddies and prezzies to Brissie for Chrissie".
by Anonymous | reply 238 | August 10, 2019 12:59 PM |
Y'all are so negative. Aussies can be friendly.
by Anonymous | reply 241 | August 10, 2019 5:25 PM |
I’m the air of white-bread suburbia that’s in every Aussie be they from the outback or Sydney.
by Anonymous | reply 242 | August 10, 2019 5:29 PM |
I'm Cody Fern's fashion sense.
by Anonymous | reply 243 | August 10, 2019 5:35 PM |
I'm the bifurcated kanga dick the ugly sheilas prefer over bogan meat whistles.
by Anonymous | reply 244 | August 10, 2019 5:41 PM |
I'm the refugees on Manus island, stuck in indefinite limbo.
by Anonymous | reply 245 | August 10, 2019 9:54 PM |
I'm the Aeroplane Jelly for breakfast, dinner, and tea.
by Anonymous | reply 246 | August 10, 2019 10:03 PM |
I'm the affluent Sri Lankan who paid big money to a professional people-smuggler who put me in a leaky boat in the middle of the Indian Ocean.
But thankfully I was rescued by the Australian navy and spent some time in the free, well-run accommodation on a lovely tropical island named Manus Island. But I missed my loved ones and took up the generous free offer of an airline ticket to my original island home.
I'm glad I'm not one of those thousands who drowned on the other leaky boats.
by Anonymous | reply 247 | August 10, 2019 10:32 PM |
I'm the Australian economy.
People tell me I'm healthy but my investment market yields only 1%. There's NO incentive to save!
by Anonymous | reply 249 | August 11, 2019 12:13 AM |
I'm a vegemite sandwich.
by Anonymous | reply 250 | August 11, 2019 12:40 AM |
Bogan Australian men don't like cats because they believe if they were to like a cat it would demasculinize them. They see cats as effeminate, so they must be killed. Killing cats asserts your masculinity.
by Anonymous | reply 251 | August 11, 2019 5:42 AM |
I'm the Albert Namatjira painting hung in many homes in the 1970s.
by Anonymous | reply 252 | August 11, 2019 5:42 AM |
I'm the Google page which says The Queen had a Namatjira painting hung in her house in 1947. She met him in the 1954 coronation tour and afterwards there was discussion about an MBE for him.
by Anonymous | reply 253 | August 11, 2019 10:51 AM |
Oh honey, the Queen doesn't have a house, she has palaces and castles, houses are for common people, like you.
by Anonymous | reply 254 | August 11, 2019 10:53 AM |
I'm Ivan Milat who did the country a great service in deterring those hideous foreigner backpackers by murdering them.
by Anonymous | reply 255 | August 11, 2019 11:01 AM |
I’m the gorgeous bum of singer-actor Tim Draxl.
I’m much celebrated on his Instagram, making frequent - and appreciated - appearances in various stages of undress.
by Anonymous | reply 256 | August 11, 2019 6:30 PM |
I’m the gorgeous bum of singer-actor Tim Draxl.
I’m much celebrated on his Instagram, making frequent - and appreciated - appearances in various stages of undress.
by Anonymous | reply 257 | August 11, 2019 6:30 PM |
I’m the gay remittance men sent out from England so as not to cause family embarrassment. We had a fabulous time Oz!
by Anonymous | reply 258 | August 11, 2019 6:38 PM |
I'm the Queensland manual arts teacher from the 1980s with a handle bar mustache, dress shorts and knee high socks. I'm also a narrow-minded relic.
by Anonymous | reply 259 | August 11, 2019 9:26 PM |
I'm the woke SJW Greenie Australian who likes to criticise his nation.
by Anonymous | reply 260 | August 11, 2019 9:31 PM |
We’re the Targets and Kmarts owned by Wesfarmers. Our logos —just the tiniest bit off — may lead you to believe we’re related to the American stores, but we don’t know her.
by Anonymous | reply 261 | August 11, 2019 10:51 PM |
I'm the joyful music of Ross Edwards.
This may be a picture of a bleak landscape but the music is quite different.
by Anonymous | reply 262 | August 11, 2019 11:47 PM |
OMG r259 you went to my school?
by Anonymous | reply 263 | August 12, 2019 3:22 AM |
I'm the country that prosecutes Bill Posters.
by Anonymous | reply 264 | August 12, 2019 6:37 AM |
R264 Poor William "Bill" Posters!
by Anonymous | reply 265 | August 12, 2019 7:42 AM |
I'm the bogan tradies that Australia considers social elites over classy, educated people.
by Anonymous | reply 266 | August 12, 2019 8:25 AM |
I'm the DLer who's confused by what R266 is saying.
Can you give us a name, an example or a Youtube video?
by Anonymous | reply 267 | August 12, 2019 11:42 AM |
I'm Australia's lazy and destructive economic management which centres on turbo-charged mass immigration and reducing wages.
by Anonymous | reply 268 | August 12, 2019 12:32 PM |
I am the mysterious Junie Morosi.
by Anonymous | reply 269 | August 13, 2019 6:02 AM |
I'm the intense young man who needs to stab two women while shouting Allahu Akbar in the centre off the Sydney CBD.
I've got woolly mop of hair like Dzhokhar Tsarnaev and when the police drag me away my trousers are dragged down my slim hips exposing my black bikini briefs.
by Anonymous | reply 270 | August 13, 2019 6:20 AM |
And I'm the Aussie blokes who chased him and caught him and held him till the police arrived, using (wait for this, Americans) two chairs and a milk crate.
The good guys don't have to have guns.
by Anonymous | reply 271 | August 13, 2019 3:00 PM |
R271 They might have found guns more useful than chairs if the bad guy had one, too...
Not minimizing the bystander's bravery - not to mention ingenuity: use what you've got - but one situation is very different than the other.
by Anonymous | reply 272 | August 13, 2019 3:14 PM |
I'm the 1970s. Every Australian TV show will look like it was filmed in me, even when it was filmed in 2010. My older brother the 1960s reigns supreme in New Zealand.
by Anonymous | reply 273 | August 13, 2019 4:44 PM |
I'm coffee, and I'm worshipped in Australia to the point that no other nation in the world could possibly have any coffee which comes even remotely close to me in quality. I'm even brought along on vacations to America. That's how pretentiously glorified I am. And flavored coffee? Punishable by death.
by Anonymous | reply 274 | August 13, 2019 4:53 PM |
I'm coffee, and I'm worshipped in Australia to the point that no other nation in the world could possibly have any coffee which comes even remotely close to me in quality. I'm even brought along on vacations to America. That's how pretentiously glorified I am. And flavored coffee? Punishable by death.
by Anonymous | reply 275 | August 13, 2019 4:54 PM |
We're the rude, aggressive drivers of Australia, laughing at you as we pass you at 144 km/hour.
by Anonymous | reply 276 | August 13, 2019 4:56 PM |
I am the cute koala in the animal park that is trotted it out for tourist to have their photograph taken with.
They think I am lovable till they detect with their support hand that I have a greasy, green, wet butt.
by Anonymous | reply 277 | August 13, 2019 5:00 PM |
We're the indigenous people of Australia, and we respectfully ask you white folks to kindly get the fuck out of our continent.
by Anonymous | reply 278 | August 13, 2019 5:46 PM |
I'm that tan uncut cock. Yum.
by Anonymous | reply 279 | August 13, 2019 6:17 PM |
I'm the shorts that end above the knees worn by every tradie. I am rather practice summer wear, but I've been banned on American construction sites since the release of YMCA.
by Anonymous | reply 280 | August 13, 2019 8:40 PM |
We're the taxpayers of Australia, and we respectfully ask you indigenous people (R278) to stop being so sanctimonious while taking Centrelink money every fortnight of your lives.
by Anonymous | reply 281 | August 13, 2019 10:14 PM |
I'm Julia Morris. Australia's answer to Lena Dunham.
by Anonymous | reply 282 | August 13, 2019 10:24 PM |
I’m a wombat. If you hold me on your lap during your visit to a wildlife centre, I will pee on you.
by Anonymous | reply 283 | August 14, 2019 1:23 AM |
I'm a koala and I can guarantee that I will urinate on you (while I sleep).
by Anonymous | reply 284 | August 14, 2019 1:33 AM |
You do realise r286 that Americans are going to think that's real.
by Anonymous | reply 287 | August 14, 2019 3:46 AM |
I'm Herbert Hoover, and revisionist republicans don't want you to know I was one of the evil fuckers behind Broken Hill Proprietary Ltd.
by Anonymous | reply 288 | August 14, 2019 3:55 AM |
R286 I love Channille! (and her Vietnamese overlockers)
by Anonymous | reply 289 | August 14, 2019 4:01 AM |
I'm the Daily Planet, a well-known whorehouse listed on the Melbourne Stock Exchange
by Anonymous | reply 290 | August 14, 2019 4:03 AM |
I'm Walter Burley Griffin, the American who designed your capital for you.
The absence of anything even remotely enjoyable to do there beyond the nightly knees-ups was intentional.
by Anonymous | reply 292 | August 14, 2019 4:09 AM |
I'm Melbourne, the sun has never shone here, ever. It's compulsory to wear all black here, all day. People live at laneway and curbside cafes sipping coffee all day pretending they're in Paris, talking about ugly modern art they know nothing about.
by Anonymous | reply 293 | August 14, 2019 4:11 AM |
I'm the short lived music career of just about every soap star.
by Anonymous | reply 294 | August 14, 2019 4:12 AM |
I'm Melbourne's three seasons in one day weather. Because of me, Melburnians don't leave home without an umbrella, a coat and a part of shorts.
I'm Melbourne's famous Cool Change, a shift in the wind that reduces 42C temps to 22C in 15 minutes. In Western Australia, this weather phenomenon is known as the Fremantle (or Freo) Doctor.
by Anonymous | reply 295 | August 14, 2019 4:20 AM |
I’m Skippy the Bush Kangaroo.
by Anonymous | reply 296 | August 14, 2019 4:38 AM |
R275 fails to realise that it is specifically American coffee, like American food, which is strange and awful. Flavoured coffee being a striking example. Nobody else does that.
Australians, who are busy travellers, are perfectly happy with the coffee in Europe and the Middle East, which are just like what they get at home. In the same way, a visit to an Italian restaurant in Italy is similar to the same in Australia, but very dissimilar from a visit to an Italian restaurant in the most sophisticated cities of the US, where there are likely to be burgers on the menu and the passata is likely to be tomato paste.
The reason you find food and drink "weird" everywhere else, is that it's weird THERE. Everybody else is judging you, not just Aussies.
by Anonymous | reply 297 | August 14, 2019 5:15 AM |
It's true, America has the worst coffee I've tasted anywhere in the world
by Anonymous | reply 298 | August 14, 2019 5:52 AM |
I'm the Little River Band.
by Anonymous | reply 299 | August 14, 2019 6:15 AM |
I’m the black bikini briefs mentioned at r270.
by Anonymous | reply 302 | August 14, 2019 8:27 AM |
The cops strip-searched him in the middle of the street, that's why his pants are down.
by Anonymous | reply 303 | August 14, 2019 9:29 AM |
I'm Jane Badler who gave up a career in sci-fi to become Aussie and a local billionaire's wife.
by Anonymous | reply 304 | August 14, 2019 9:32 AM |
I'm the late Anne Baxter who temporarily gave up a movie career to be a sheep-owner's wife 300 kilometres from Sydney
by Anonymous | reply 305 | August 14, 2019 10:08 AM |
I am the Cleo magazine nude male centrefold.
by Anonymous | reply 306 | August 15, 2019 9:39 AM |
I'm the founding editor of said Cleo magazine, Ita Buttrose, who probably has no idea what a butt rose is!
by Anonymous | reply 307 | August 15, 2019 12:03 PM |
I'm Paul Keating aka The Grim Reaper. I served as Federal Treasurer in the Hawke Government, then became Prime Minister of Australia in 1991. Not bad for a 14 year old school leaver.
by Anonymous | reply 308 | August 15, 2019 12:12 PM |
I love bin chickens.
They add colour and diversity to my city.
by Anonymous | reply 311 | August 15, 2019 9:54 PM |
I'm Al Grassby, down in the Riverina.
by Anonymous | reply 312 | August 17, 2019 6:30 AM |
I'm the dinosaur bin chicken, I've been scratching and clawing my way from the hinterland and soon the cornucopia of Sydney's bins will be mine!!!!
by Anonymous | reply 313 | August 17, 2019 6:40 AM |
I'm Melbourne's Moomba Festival, yet another cultural appropriation by White fellahs looking for any excuse to knock back a few.
by Anonymous | reply 314 | August 17, 2019 6:41 AM |
I'm the life guards on the beach you all come to stare at while I save your life.
by Anonymous | reply 315 | August 17, 2019 7:00 AM |
R309 The Bin Chicken was my high-school mascot.
by Anonymous | reply 316 | August 17, 2019 8:25 AM |
I'm The Jewel of Australia, unmatched in my beauty.
by Anonymous | reply 317 | August 17, 2019 11:00 AM |
I'm the sock that the delightfully spry radio unpersonality, Alan Jones wants to shove down female prime minister's throats.
by Anonymous | reply 318 | August 17, 2019 12:57 PM |
I'm former Prime Minister, John Howard's bowling skills.
by Anonymous | reply 321 | August 17, 2019 3:46 PM |
I'm Todd "Bubbler" Carney.
I don't go to the loo alone any more.
by Anonymous | reply 322 | August 17, 2019 5:21 PM |
I'd do Todd Carney, he has a nice butt
by Anonymous | reply 324 | August 17, 2019 5:49 PM |
R326 I loved that show as a kid.
by Anonymous | reply 327 | August 18, 2019 6:24 AM |
I'm Number 96 that brought sex, nudity (including full frontal), gays, trans, rape and others goodies into your lounge room in 1972
by Anonymous | reply 330 | August 18, 2019 7:15 AM |
no 96 must have sent the pearl-clutching Christian fraus running for their valium.
by Anonymous | reply 332 | August 18, 2019 7:22 AM |
I'm Wogs Out of Work and Franco Cozzo (from Footescray).
by Anonymous | reply 334 | August 18, 2019 7:27 AM |
I'm Warwick Capper, former full forward for the Sydney Swans.
by Anonymous | reply 335 | August 18, 2019 7:37 AM |
I'm Rolf Harris and I like to fiddle about, fiddle about, fiddle about....
by Anonymous | reply 337 | August 18, 2019 9:04 AM |
I'm Noel Watson (with Akubra), singing the best rendition of Waltzing Matilda at the Grand Final.
by Anonymous | reply 338 | August 18, 2019 9:12 AM |
I'm the Australian who watches the Australian Gogglebox. It's so refreshing to see people on TV who talk like us instead of the usual plastic robots.
What I don't understand is how the camera records them speaking without the sound of the actual TV broadcast at the same time.
by Anonymous | reply 339 | August 19, 2019 3:30 AM |
R332 - on the contrary, they all seem to have watched and learned! As I recall, there was surprisingly little serious controversy (as opposed to the kind that the network encouraged to draw in viewers).
Number 96 was so popular that in its heyday you could walk up any street in the 'burbs when it was ending and hear the theme music coming out of practically every house you passed.
R330's video shows Vera Collins (the non-pregnant one in the still), who would certainly have become a DL fave had the internet existed at that time.
by Anonymous | reply 340 | August 19, 2019 3:34 PM |
R340 - Yes Vera would have been a huge hit here. Poor thing always unlucky in love - even her one lesbian fling all ended in tears. Abused by her husband Harry (Norman Yem) and the poor thing was spied on by a lesbian flatmate in season one played by the legendary Hazel Phillips (who is still with us). I remember when Vera was charged with manslaughter for the death of a character called Betty Booth who was having an affair with Harry and as Betty and Vera where fighting at the top of the stairs Betty fell down them and died. Also in the movie of Number 96 which opens with poor Vera having her car breaking down and then some bikies turn up and gang rape her. By all accounts Elaine Lee (who played Vera) was a wonderful person and she played Vera superbly. She passed away a couple of years ago and her funeral was huge and well attended. A real fan favourite.
Maggie Cameron was another great character - an all time bitch - she too would have been popular on the site. Her best moment was of course planting a bomb in the building, which she owned. Such a great great show.
by Anonymous | reply 341 | August 20, 2019 9:01 AM |
Ben Unwin (Jesse from Home and Away), who was gay and went on to become a lawyer, killed himself last week at 41. Jumped off a cliff.
by Anonymous | reply 342 | August 20, 2019 10:14 AM |
R341, yes, between them Vera and Maggie (who, you will recall, fancied Don's bisexual boyfriend) chewed so much scenery it must've taken half the budget to replace it.
Along with Vera's, er, unluckiness in love, she was also a psychic and a dress designer. How could the DL resist?
by Anonymous | reply 343 | August 20, 2019 10:34 AM |
I'm the Aussie woman duped into smuggling heroin from S.E Asia.
by Anonymous | reply 346 | August 20, 2019 1:07 PM |
How sad that Ben felt he had no one to help him. I hate those showbiz phonies who make his death all about their grief and I bet never bothered to keep in touch with him after he left the show.
by Anonymous | reply 347 | August 20, 2019 1:21 PM |
I'm Schapelle Corby.
by Anonymous | reply 348 | August 20, 2019 1:36 PM |
I'm the breathtaking flora (apart from the parched grass) that everyone seems to take for granted but is the main reason I watch Australian productions.
by Anonymous | reply 349 | August 20, 2019 2:07 PM |
R342 I don't know how you can say he was gay.
He did it just before his 42nd birthday.
by Anonymous | reply 350 | August 20, 2019 9:20 PM |
I can say he was gay cause he was!
by Anonymous | reply 351 | August 20, 2019 10:25 PM |
Not a snarky but a genuine question, r351: how do you know he’s gay? Details please.
by Anonymous | reply 352 | August 21, 2019 2:57 AM |
I'm the Australian National Anthem. I've changed from G-d Save the Queen to several iterations of Advance Australia Fair, reworded due to sexism and bigotry.
No wonder no one knows the words.
by Anonymous | reply 354 | August 21, 2019 5:19 AM |
I think there was a report of Ben being seen at a sauna in the Australian gossip thread.
by Anonymous | reply 355 | August 21, 2019 6:55 AM |
You're terrible Muriel
by Anonymous | reply 356 | August 21, 2019 6:57 AM |
I'm dingoism, the unfounded belief that Australia is the best country in the world!
by Anonymous | reply 358 | August 21, 2019 7:48 AM |
[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]
by Anonymous | reply 359 | August 21, 2019 8:39 PM |
I'm Brian Henderson.
by Anonymous | reply 361 | August 22, 2019 3:33 AM |
True, R354, but at least you can sing it to the tune of Gilligan's Island. (You even get to sing "Our home is girt by sea" twice if you do!)
by Anonymous | reply 362 | August 22, 2019 5:42 AM |
A slab of Tooheys or VB (or Monteith for the New Zealanders) to anyone who remembers running like hell out of the cinema at the end of the film so they wouldn't have to stand and sing G-d Save the Queen.
by Anonymous | reply 363 | August 22, 2019 5:54 AM |
I am Liam Hemsworth. I hired a fancy LA lawyer to squeeze my wealthy wife for money. She is worth ten times more than me. We were married just 7 months, but I deserve some type of financial support as my movie career is winding down.
by Anonymous | reply 364 | August 22, 2019 6:19 AM |
Liam Nepotism Hemsworth knew she was a dyke the whole time
by Anonymous | reply 365 | August 22, 2019 8:34 AM |
I'm John William Pilbean Goffage also known as Chips Rafferty, born in Broken Hill.
by Anonymous | reply 366 | August 22, 2019 9:00 AM |
I'm John Henry "Jack" Absalom, OAM. I authored several books and TV series teaching urban White fellas the skills for surviving in the outback that I learned as a littlie from Black fellas living out on the Nullabor. I was the last of the dinky die Bushmen.
by Anonymous | reply 369 | August 22, 2019 9:21 AM |
I'm even EARLIER Kylie (and her sister Dannii) on Young Talent Time.
by Anonymous | reply 371 | August 22, 2019 11:02 AM |
I'm Johnny Young.
by Anonymous | reply 372 | August 22, 2019 12:11 PM |
I'm Emu Nugent.
by Anonymous | reply 373 | August 22, 2019 1:08 PM |
by Anonymous | reply 375 | August 22, 2019 3:11 PM |
I'm the movie 'Australia'. And I'm a bit of a dud!
by Anonymous | reply 377 | August 22, 2019 9:50 PM |
I'm Baz Luhrmann and I'm a drunk.
I have appeared on the national broadcaster at 10am on a Monday and I was incoherent.
Three of my last five movies are testament to the advice that you should NEVER give a million dollars to a drunk.
by Anonymous | reply 378 | August 23, 2019 1:46 AM |
Baz Luhrmann has always been incoherent, right back as far as Strictly Ballroom. He's never been able to string two words together (a fact that shows up in any script he dominates). I know interviewers who won't have him on without Catherine because they can't even cut it together later to make sense.
That doesn't rule out his being a drunk, but if he is I don't think that's the only thing standing between him and an interesting interview.
My fantasy interview is him and Molly Meldrum together.
by Anonymous | reply 379 | August 23, 2019 2:27 AM |
Here's Baz in a Guardian interview:
He and Martin – whom he calls CM – live with their two children, aged 12 and 14. Whether at their homes in New York or Sydney, husband and wife inhabit different floors and sleep separately, convening at the weekend for a hotel date night. Do they still have sex? “Yeah, we do. And you know what? She rocks out. She’s a bit of a wolf. She always dresses up in strange costumes.”
And him? “Look, it’s never gonna be like when you were 20. I’m not saying it’s boring, but it becomes part of the ceremony: the intimacy, the talk afterwards. Our relationship is full of acceptance. She knew who I was going in, and I knew who she was. Without going into details, we’ve lived a pretty boho life. There’s nothing about either of us that the other one doesn’t know. We have our way, and that works for us.”
by Anonymous | reply 380 | August 23, 2019 2:49 AM |
I'm Paulus Henrique Benedictus Cox (16 April 1940 – 18 June 2016) known as Paul Cox, a Dutch-Australian filmmaker, who has been recognized as "Australia's most prolific film auteur".
by Anonymous | reply 381 | August 23, 2019 2:52 AM |
I'm the Aussie movie audience who was happy to go pay to watch Aussie movies in the 1980s, 80s and 90s.
But we lost interest in our own movies over the last decade. They're too few of us to support self-indulgent "art-house" movie-makers like the aforementioned Paulus Cox R381.
by Anonymous | reply 382 | August 23, 2019 7:29 AM |
No way did Baz say something that fluent, R380. He may have voiced sentiments broadly in line with what was reported, but sentences? with proper punctuation? I don't think so.
by Anonymous | reply 383 | August 23, 2019 9:38 AM |
I'm Deni Hines, rumored to be the 'Unicorn on 'Masked Singer Australia'.
by Anonymous | reply 384 | August 23, 2019 9:40 AM |
I'm Jonathan Swan bursting out of shirt and surprisingly getting engaged to a woman.
by Anonymous | reply 385 | August 23, 2019 10:11 AM |
On the topic of Aussie directors: I was at a film festival far from Oz at a screening of Rabbit Proof Fence by Philip Noyce. I had the misfortune to sit directly in front of Noyce, who kept a running commentary going about the film to a festival official during the screening. I'd finally had a gutful, turned around and said to Noyce, "Give it a rest, mate, will ya? I came to see yer bloody film, not listen to you yammer". He was gobsmacked, probably because he didn't expect to find an Aussie at the screening. And he never said another word.
by Anonymous | reply 386 | August 23, 2019 11:35 AM |
I'm the stolen generation. A generation of children stolen from the families due to white arrogance.
by Anonymous | reply 387 | August 23, 2019 12:51 PM |
I'm Maggie Tabberer.
by Anonymous | reply 388 | August 23, 2019 12:58 PM |
I'm Joan Child, AO. I was the first woman Speaker of the House of Representatives. Crickey! It was like being it charge of a bunch of littlies at creche.
by Anonymous | reply 389 | August 23, 2019 1:04 PM |
I'm the carry over champion on Saaale of the Century!!!!
by Anonymous | reply 390 | August 23, 2019 1:09 PM |
We're John Burgess and Adriana Xenides. We're far better at it than Barber and Delaney.
by Anonymous | reply 391 | August 23, 2019 1:17 PM |
I'm Clive Robertson. I'm living proof that not everyone born in the back of beyond (Katoomba) is a brainless Ocker.
by Anonymous | reply 392 | August 23, 2019 1:21 PM |
I'm Graham Kennedy, comedian, entertainer, star of film and television and as dinky die as they come.
by Anonymous | reply 393 | August 23, 2019 1:25 PM |
[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]
by Anonymous | reply 397 | August 23, 2019 9:31 PM |
R387 I'm the aboriginals that would beat up the half-caste children that needed to be protected by the 'Bad White Man'.
by Anonymous | reply 398 | August 24, 2019 3:00 AM |
And, R387, I'm the aboriginal who takes the 'Bad White Man's Centrelink payment every fortnight.
by Anonymous | reply 399 | August 24, 2019 3:05 AM |
After destroying their culture, heritage and ability to exist with dignity, I'm the White fella who damns Aboriginals as bludgers.
by Anonymous | reply 400 | August 24, 2019 3:51 AM |
I'm the Irish Australian who once made up around 40% of the population but is now relieved that the Welfare State allows me to express my noblesse oblige to all those sundry persons with long-standing, centuries-old grievances.
by Anonymous | reply 401 | August 24, 2019 3:55 AM |
I'm Hugh Sheridan and I may be having an affair with a young man in showbiz.
by Anonymous | reply 402 | August 24, 2019 3:58 AM |
I'm Simon Baker who used to be known as Simon Denny and Simon Baker Denny.
by Anonymous | reply 403 | August 24, 2019 7:24 AM |
We're the 3rd-rate Aussie actors who moved to the US and England and found fame/fortune.
by Anonymous | reply 404 | August 24, 2019 7:33 AM |
I’m the bespectacled hotness of Simon Baker:
by Anonymous | reply 405 | August 24, 2019 8:13 AM |
I’m the bespectacled hotness of Simon Baker:
by Anonymous | reply 406 | August 24, 2019 8:13 AM |
I’m the bespectacled hotness of Simon Baker:
by Anonymous | reply 407 | August 24, 2019 8:13 AM |
Simon was so beautiful when he was young that I was surprised he didn't go Hollywood sooner.
by Anonymous | reply 408 | August 24, 2019 8:36 AM |
R404 One of the best comments on this thread!
by Anonymous | reply 409 | August 24, 2019 8:58 AM |
I'm Hugh Sheridan and no one knows I'm gay, I hide it so well.
by Anonymous | reply 410 | August 24, 2019 12:43 PM |
I'm the roos randomly duking it out in their parking lots.
by Anonymous | reply 411 | August 24, 2019 3:12 PM |
I'm the cringe-worthy jealousy every Melbourne native has for Sydney.
by Anonymous | reply 412 | August 24, 2019 9:41 PM |
I'm Sonia McMahon's daring dress, split both sides to the armpits though held together by rhinestones about two centimetres apart from the waist up, to a dinner for her husband hosted by President Richard Nixon in 1971.
by Anonymous | reply 413 | August 25, 2019 3:12 AM |
I'm the Holden Kingswood Ute, transport of choice for brickies and bushmen.
by Anonymous | reply 415 | August 25, 2019 7:46 AM |
I'm Julian McMahon, son of scantily-clad Sonia mentioned in R413 and former Oz PM William. I'm another one of those talentless but oh-so-handsome Aussie actors that Yanks can't seem to get enough of.
by Anonymous | reply 416 | August 25, 2019 8:03 AM |
I'm Judith Anderson, born in Adelaide.
by Anonymous | reply 417 | August 25, 2019 10:22 AM |
We're The Seekers.
by Anonymous | reply 418 | August 25, 2019 10:24 AM |
I'm angry at the second-raters on 'Australian Survivor'.
They acknowledged their slimy, second-rate weakness by banding together to evict Shaun Hampson the most beautiful and talented of the competitors.
It was democracy at its worst. It was Mobocracy.
by Anonymous | reply 419 | August 25, 2019 11:22 AM |
I'm Maureen McCormick, who won the Aussie's hearts on their version of "I'm a Celebrity".
by Anonymous | reply 420 | August 25, 2019 12:37 PM |
I'm a group of bogans on their cheap holiday in Southeast Asia
by Anonymous | reply 421 | August 25, 2019 1:19 PM |
And I'm bogans who couldn't even afford a cheap holiday.
by Anonymous | reply 422 | August 25, 2019 1:23 PM |
We go to Bali cause it's $200 a week and we can say we've been overseas
by Anonymous | reply 423 | August 25, 2019 1:26 PM |
I'm Dannii, who was married to that Julian guy above and *allegedly walked in on him and a slutty co-star on that charming little show he was on.
by Anonymous | reply 425 | August 25, 2019 2:25 PM |
I'm the clueless tourist who thinks she's a Disney princess and tries to feed the birds, but ends up getting bullied by a flock of cockatoos.
by Anonymous | reply 426 | August 25, 2019 8:06 PM |
I'm the due respect given to our PMs by the citizens:
by Anonymous | reply 427 | August 26, 2019 3:51 AM |
^ We're big and mute.
by Anonymous | reply 429 | August 27, 2019 12:58 AM |
^ Visitors can climb on us because we're agnostic rock.
Whereas the rock in the middle of the continent 1500 miles away is a religious rock.
by Anonymous | reply 430 | August 27, 2019 1:33 AM |
I'm an Easter Island statue escapee..........
by Anonymous | reply 431 | August 27, 2019 4:56 AM |
r431 there are certain things money cant buy
by Anonymous | reply 432 | August 27, 2019 7:31 AM |
l'm crusty old lesbian Dawn O'Donnell
by Anonymous | reply 434 | August 28, 2019 3:03 PM |
I'm the newcomer showing disrespect to words in the native language.
(but 99% of those languages are misspelled because they're translated phonetically without documentation)
by Anonymous | reply 435 | August 28, 2019 11:57 PM |
I'm the newcomer arriving by boat claiming asylum. I return the compliment by having a 'sexual emergency' and masturbating over a stolen 3 year old child in a shopping centre stairwell.
(I'm sexy with big muscles)
by Anonymous | reply 436 | August 29, 2019 12:14 AM |
I'm R435 (who also posted gazillion other times on this thread), a proud White Supremacist bogan and the reason why we Canadians, when visiting Australia, feel like we've stepped into a time machine that has just taken us back to 1950s when such shit could still fly in Canada.
by Anonymous | reply 437 | August 29, 2019 12:42 AM |
I'm the grumpy Canadian tourist who likes to complain and who talks about his 'flying shit".
by Anonymous | reply 438 | August 29, 2019 1:06 AM |
I'm the happy quokka!!!
(a great scrabble word, by the by!)
by Anonymous | reply 439 | August 29, 2019 7:49 PM |
I'm Bill Collins and died in June. Where was my street parade?!
by Anonymous | reply 440 | August 30, 2019 3:17 AM |
I'm Georgie Stone and I'm playing the first trans character on Neighbours! ScoMo won't be happy.
by Anonymous | reply 441 | August 30, 2019 5:02 AM |
I'm Ivan Milat. I was responsible for a spate of serial killings that took place in New South Wales between 1989 and 1993.
by Anonymous | reply 442 | August 30, 2019 5:26 AM |
R440 It's held every February in Sydney Bill.
by Anonymous | reply 443 | August 30, 2019 6:40 AM |
DL will think Ivan was hot.
by Anonymous | reply 444 | August 30, 2019 7:10 AM |
R437 I'm the higher rate of immigration per capita of Australia compared to Canada.
by Anonymous | reply 445 | August 30, 2019 11:44 AM |
R437 I'm the higher rate of immigration per capita of Australia compared to Canada.
by Anonymous | reply 446 | August 30, 2019 11:45 AM |
I'm the classy, articulate 'Bachelor' contestant, who isn't at all a sign that we are facing extinction as a species.
by Anonymous | reply 447 | August 30, 2019 12:01 PM |
[quote]I'm the dingooo that ate your baybee!
Thank you so much OP!
by Anonymous | reply 448 | August 30, 2019 12:02 PM |
They could have had Bill Collins lying in state at the State Theatre in Sydney.
by Anonymous | reply 452 | August 31, 2019 3:46 AM |
I'm the lamb roast that mum's doing.
(That's Naomi Watts, another one of Oz's 3rd-rate actresses that made good elsewhere.)
by Anonymous | reply 454 | September 2, 2019 5:46 AM |
^ I think it's Mr Squiggle??
by Anonymous | reply 458 | September 2, 2019 8:57 PM |
I liked the blackboard saying Hurry up, Hurry up!
by Anonymous | reply 459 | September 3, 2019 9:18 AM |
upside down, upside down
by Anonymous | reply 460 | September 3, 2019 9:26 AM |
We are bullies who shoot defenseless little birds. Ok this one was an asshole but still.
by Anonymous | reply 461 | September 3, 2019 9:48 AM |
I am North Stradbroke Island.
And I like it.
by Anonymous | reply 463 | September 3, 2019 9:48 PM |
I'm five '80s hits in a row (John Farnham, Jimmy Barnes, Little River Band, Kylie Minogue, James Reyne).
by Anonymous | reply 464 | September 4, 2019 4:27 AM |
Magpies are not little, R461.
by Anonymous | reply 465 | September 4, 2019 6:39 AM |
They come in different sizes but are little compared to humans. I saw a human toddler who was the same height as one trying to touch it once and thought this will end in tears, for the toddler.
by Anonymous | reply 466 | September 4, 2019 7:35 AM |
I'm the school children forced to run around an oval and told not to worry about the attacking magpies and or plovers.
by Anonymous | reply 467 | September 4, 2019 10:41 AM |
I'm Helen Demidenko also known as Helen Dale and Helen Darville.
by Anonymous | reply 468 | September 5, 2019 9:30 AM |
I'm the frozen snow on the Kosciuszko ski slopes.
by Anonymous | reply 469 | September 5, 2019 4:47 PM |
I'm OOORRRstranlian Survivor!
I hope Pia wins. The smiling assassin!
by Anonymous | reply 470 | September 6, 2019 10:02 AM |
I'm hoaxtress and nightclub singer Fairlie Arrow.
by Anonymous | reply 471 | September 6, 2019 10:26 AM |
She ^ was farilie batshit crazy, if I remember correctly!
by Anonymous | reply 472 | September 6, 2019 10:33 AM |
I'm a dentist, so I can't show my face on Datalounge.
by Anonymous | reply 473 | September 6, 2019 10:34 AM |
I'm a golden gaytime.
It's so hard to have a gaytime on your own!
by Anonymous | reply 474 | September 7, 2019 4:33 PM |
I’m a highly educated Aussie who acts super posh and British so as not to be confused with those other Striney types.
by Anonymous | reply 475 | September 7, 2019 4:37 PM |
Are you typing from 1968, R475? Or are you Geoffrey Robertson?
Nobody acts British any more, because there is no class mileage in it. Riley and Turner were spot-on with the Prue and Trude accents: that's what Australians who went to Good Schools - or would like you to think they did - sound like. It is not related to level of education, only cost thereof.
Highly educated Australians have a big range of accents these days: by no means all Aussie graduates even have English as their first language.
by Anonymous | reply 476 | September 8, 2019 1:45 PM |
[quote]Are you typing from 1968, [R475]? Or are you Geoffrey Robertson?
[quote]Nobody acts British any more, because there is no class mileage in it.
Made me laugh because I’m not “typing” at all (and *I’m* the one from 1958? Lol) and I’m not whomever that is. But I do work with a woman from Sydney who has the poshest of all possibly British accents and is often mistaken for a Brit. So I guess my answer is “neither, and ... no.”
by Anonymous | reply 477 | September 8, 2019 2:38 PM |
^^^1968
by Anonymous | reply 478 | September 8, 2019 2:38 PM |
I'm one of the three high unemployment towns being considered for drug screening for dole program.
by Anonymous | reply 479 | September 9, 2019 4:14 AM |
I'm the bushfires that are occurring in early spring.
Summer will be hell.
by Anonymous | reply 480 | September 9, 2019 8:51 PM |
I'm the 1.8 million Australian dollars it will cost to meet DL legend Kylie Minogue.
by Anonymous | reply 481 | September 10, 2019 2:55 AM |
I'm Long Service Leave and I'm just great little antipodean secret. Stick with the one employer for 10 years and you can take me at full pay for two months.
by Anonymous | reply 482 | September 10, 2019 4:35 PM |
I am Adore/ Adoration.
Australian boys and their mothers.
by Anonymous | reply 483 | September 11, 2019 4:40 AM |
R482 and it gets paid out if she stay with an employer for at least four years, and then quit!
by Anonymous | reply 484 | September 11, 2019 5:00 AM |
R484 When I was working I got 3 months the first 10 years and then 9 days added on for every additional year. I never took my leave until a year before I retired and then took some LSL at half pay. We also had 'purchased leave' where you could buy additional annual leave - it meant getting less pay but you got more days off work so I used to always be purchasing leave as well.
by Anonymous | reply 485 | September 11, 2019 5:06 AM |
[quote]Stick with the one employer for 10 years and you can take me at full pay for two months.
Long-service leave used to be 3 months after 10 years. In addition to the 9-day fortnight, one-month annual leave, 8-10 days public holidays. Vic. workers get a public holiday for a horse race called Cup Day (Melbourne Cup).
by Anonymous | reply 486 | September 11, 2019 5:17 AM |
Who gets a 9-day fortnight, R486? Or are you referring to workers on flexi-time or rosters, who can work the hours of 10 days in 9 and then get a day off in lieu of overtime? That's rather different.
by Anonymous | reply 487 | September 11, 2019 1:16 PM |
I'm a whitey mcwhite alpha male disguised as an SJW
by Anonymous | reply 488 | September 11, 2019 1:20 PM |
I'm Gladys Liu and I've been a very naughty girl....
by Anonymous | reply 490 | September 12, 2019 2:36 PM |
R490 Gladys Lui and not me! - Julie Bishop
by Anonymous | reply 492 | September 13, 2019 6:09 AM |
R492 Sure, Jan.
by Anonymous | reply 493 | September 13, 2019 6:47 AM |
I'm not R492 but I'm assuming they're making a pun on the disgraced woman's name and suggesting that Julie Bishop is 'glad it's you and not me!'.
by Anonymous | reply 494 | September 13, 2019 6:54 AM |
I'm the 40-year-old woman and man with BDF who make up 90s techno group Euphoria.
by Anonymous | reply 495 | September 13, 2019 6:56 AM |
I'm the mysterious and deadly outback. Don't run out of gas here.
by Anonymous | reply 496 | September 13, 2019 6:57 AM |
R494 This is 492 - right you are.
by Anonymous | reply 497 | September 13, 2019 7:08 AM |
I'm the never ending heat wave.
by Anonymous | reply 498 | September 13, 2019 7:13 AM |
I'm the Victorian obsession with AFL.
NOTHING. ELSE. MATTERS!
by Anonymous | reply 499 | September 13, 2019 7:59 AM |
I'm Melbourne's 6PM news. I contain 8 minutes of local news, 2 minutes of international news, and 20 minutes of footy news.
by Anonymous | reply 500 | September 13, 2019 8:07 AM |
I'm the stingray that killed Steve Irwin, earning the thanks of a grateful nation for taking out that moron.
by Anonymous | reply 502 | September 13, 2019 9:20 AM |
^Oh my, that's harsh!
I'm 'The Sullivans', featuring Datalounge legend Kylie Minogue as a weeee little one!
by Anonymous | reply 503 | September 13, 2019 9:40 AM |
R497 You wish you were R492 - tis me, you thief!
by Anonymous | reply 504 | September 13, 2019 12:14 PM |
I'm Bindi Irwin, the obnoxious, over -confident, in your face ADD daughter of said crocodile man. I think I'm 40 but I'm barely legal. I'm only famous because my father died and people feel sorry for me, and I milk it for all it's worth.
by Anonymous | reply 505 | September 13, 2019 2:35 PM |
R505 It's more the mother than the daughter. The mother was posting on Twitter every day for a week before the marriage proposal hinting at the marriage proposal to come (making it quite obvious what she was referring to) but Bindi was still "surprised" by the marriage proposal even though a camera crew was also on hand to record it all.
by Anonymous | reply 506 | September 13, 2019 2:46 PM |
Who names their child Bindi after a garden weed?
by Anonymous | reply 507 | September 13, 2019 10:55 PM |
I'm the Aussie kid who remembers being 'stung' and cut by Bindi weed every summer (but it doesn't seem so bad nowdays)
by Anonymous | reply 508 | September 13, 2019 10:59 PM |
R509 And Skippy wasn't a kangaroo but a wallaby!
by Anonymous | reply 510 | September 14, 2019 5:16 AM |
I'm the Chiko Roll. I'm the Australian classic served at diners and service stations everywhere. Confusingly, I contain no chicken and taste like shit, but bogans devour me anyway, because of all the hot chicks used in my advertising.
by Anonymous | reply 512 | September 14, 2019 8:40 AM |
R512 One of those 'hot chicks' was a trans. I kid you not! A good friend of mine was a friend of hers.
by Anonymous | reply 513 | September 14, 2019 8:42 AM |
^ Was that 'hot chick' a genuine transexual or just a transvestite?
by Anonymous | reply 514 | September 14, 2019 9:25 AM |
R514 Trans - she had undergone full surgery. Looked better than most females born 'female'.
by Anonymous | reply 515 | September 14, 2019 9:31 AM |
r512 the one in the top left hand photo looks masculine, that leg looks manly
by Anonymous | reply 516 | September 14, 2019 11:15 AM |
R516 I think that is the trans.
by Anonymous | reply 517 | September 14, 2019 11:17 AM |
I'm Jodi Gordon's over-bite and I'm not going anywhere.
by Anonymous | reply 518 | September 14, 2019 12:47 PM |
I'm sorry to say that an estimated 20% of Australia's population have their skin painted (though 20% of those have expressed regret for their rashness)
by Anonymous | reply 520 | September 16, 2019 6:31 AM |
^ What on earth are you referring to?
by Anonymous | reply 521 | September 16, 2019 6:29 PM |
I'm the Aboriginal message to immigrants: "respect our laws, or fuck off back home"
by Anonymous | reply 525 | September 17, 2019 7:49 AM |
That was always their message, R525, but Europeans took no notice.
Now it's the ruling class's message to immigrants, and it's only justice they're not taking any notice either.
by Anonymous | reply 526 | September 17, 2019 8:58 AM |
I'm Kamahl.
by Anonymous | reply 527 | September 17, 2019 10:54 PM |
I'm Kamahl, not Kamala, but we ARE related!
(you can see it in our lovely brown eyes and large forehead)
by Anonymous | reply 528 | September 18, 2019 1:06 AM |
I'm the state dinner happening at the White House now!
Why does the Don, love Australia so much. It's only the second state dinner he's hosted. France and the hot young president being the other.
by Anonymous | reply 532 | September 20, 2019 10:25 PM |
We're Savage Garden in 1998. Nothing poofy going on here!
by Anonymous | reply 533 | September 20, 2019 10:45 PM |
I'm passive aggressive dominatrix Liz Hayes
by Anonymous | reply 534 | September 20, 2019 11:10 PM |
I'm "Muriel's Wedding", that other Australian movie about a talking pig.
by Anonymous | reply 536 | September 21, 2019 12:58 AM |
I'm Elle 'The Body' Macpherson.
by Anonymous | reply 538 | September 21, 2019 11:13 AM |
I'm the National Anthem as sung by twink Harrison Craig.
by Anonymous | reply 539 | September 21, 2019 11:24 AM |
So why hasn't Charlie Goldsmith cured his aunt of cancer?
by Anonymous | reply 540 | September 21, 2019 11:29 AM |
I'm the hot backup dancers for The Voice's Aydan Calafiore.
by Anonymous | reply 541 | September 21, 2019 11:30 AM |
I'm former PM Julia Gillard and I hate gays "Marriage is between a man and a woman" - spoken with the voice of a bigot bogan
by Anonymous | reply 542 | September 21, 2019 11:56 AM |
I'm heiress Stephanie Harper who gets bitten by a crocodile, becomes a super model and returns to Eden for revenge.
by Anonymous | reply 544 | September 21, 2019 12:25 PM |
I'm our thick as two bricks fundy happy clappy gay-hating prime minster and his homely frumpy wife turning up at the White House like the uncultured poor relatives, sucking up to Trump like he's god. Barf! #slomo
by Anonymous | reply 545 | September 21, 2019 12:45 PM |
I'm plastic surgery victim Jack Vidgen, who changed from a cute boy to a hideous freak.
by Anonymous | reply 546 | September 21, 2019 12:48 PM |
I'm Jenny Morrison's home job haircut and Katies dress next to Melania's $6000 gown
by Anonymous | reply 547 | September 21, 2019 12:51 PM |
We're white Australians, the lowest of the low, culturally, sociologically, and otherwise, of all white English speaking people on the planet. That's why we are so racist and eager to shit on Aborigines and other non-white Australians, not to mention refugees.
In other words, "Hello, Kettle, this is Pot calling..."
by Anonymous | reply 549 | September 21, 2019 1:36 PM |
I'm the Melbourne Cup.
I torture and kill horses.
I encourage day time binge drinking.
I support addictive gambling.
Taylor..............why you not come????
by Anonymous | reply 551 | September 21, 2019 8:40 PM |
[quote]I'm former PM Julia Gillard and I hate gays "Marriage is between a man and a woman" - spoken with the voice of a bigot bogan
Talk about our embarrassing frumps taking the stage. Here is Gillard at 21, looking mid-50s already. She only stopped dressing from frau Suzanne Grae boutiques in her final year of office. For heaven's sake, she was married to a flaming hairdresser and even he couldn't help her!
by Anonymous | reply 552 | September 22, 2019 3:16 AM |
R552 They weren't married, just 'living together'. Rumours abound that he was bearding for her.
by Anonymous | reply 553 | September 22, 2019 5:05 AM |
R553, if so, he was even more remiss in not giving her a makeover.
But yeah, "Marriage is between a man and a woman" is a good one, coming from someone who has never married. Very sacred institution, doncha know.
by Anonymous | reply 555 | September 22, 2019 4:31 PM |
I'm hordes of unwashed from Nimbin, Byron Bay, and Margaret River about to re-settle in smokers paradise Canberra.
by Anonymous | reply 556 | September 25, 2019 5:40 AM |
I'm the AFL grand final, which few outside of Victoria care about.
by Anonymous | reply 558 | September 27, 2019 9:21 PM |
I'm the 150 000 000 dollars the conservative Australian prime minister, has offered Trump to help him get to Mars.
by Anonymous | reply 559 | September 27, 2019 9:22 PM |
Frankly, R559, if it helps get Trump to Mars it's worth any amount of money.
by Anonymous | reply 560 | September 28, 2019 11:45 AM |
I'm Pat, Australia's Norma Desmond who couldn't cope wth being a nobody----
by Anonymous | reply 566 | September 29, 2019 5:21 AM |
r562 white only dears
by Anonymous | reply 567 | September 29, 2019 5:24 AM |
Are you white, R567?
Do you feel cheated, R567?
Are you a Virtue-Signaller, R567?
by Anonymous | reply 568 | September 29, 2019 5:34 AM |
I'm the dead Great Barrier Reef.
by Anonymous | reply 571 | September 29, 2019 6:34 AM |
r568 Read up on The White Australia Policy and get educated you daft cunt
by Anonymous | reply 572 | September 29, 2019 10:57 AM |
I'm your best mate, who you can affectionately call 'daft cunt'.
by Anonymous | reply 573 | September 30, 2019 8:37 PM |
I am the Australian accent that gets me numerous roles on tv but I suck as an actor.
by Anonymous | reply 574 | September 30, 2019 8:58 PM |
I'm the TV show "Wentworth" sadly languishing in "Orange is the New Black's" American shadow.
by Anonymous | reply 576 | October 6, 2019 6:27 AM |
Yumi Stines is a dopey cunt with a huge chip on her shoulder
by Anonymous | reply 577 | October 6, 2019 6:38 AM |
Make that Stynes# not that I care
by Anonymous | reply 578 | October 6, 2019 6:39 AM |
I'm Maroochydore where guys go to swim wearing cozzies!
by Anonymous | reply 579 | October 6, 2019 11:07 AM |
KAK is whack!
I've always liked Yumi. She tells it like she sees it.
I'm fairy bread.
by Anonymous | reply 580 | October 6, 2019 11:25 AM |
I'm this production of Pirates of Penzance staring the *not* gay Simon Gallaher , but I can hold A and G notes like nobody's business.
by Anonymous | reply 581 | October 6, 2019 11:52 AM |
I'm Todd McKenney, who accidentally on purpose 'outed' Simon Gallaher, who was married to his sister!
Oh my pearls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
by Anonymous | reply 582 | October 6, 2019 12:07 PM |
The Todd McKinney who was found wandering a park late at night with his pants down
by Anonymous | reply 584 | October 6, 2019 12:19 PM |
This is what being in the closet does to you.
SG went from lanky young man with a butterface, to this:
by Anonymous | reply 585 | October 6, 2019 12:25 PM |
What Todd McKenneys did was vile and cruel. You don't harm a man, his wife and children that way even "accident" on purpose.
by Anonymous | reply 586 | October 6, 2019 12:30 PM |
I’m the home security system to ward off home invaders which is rampant after guns were confiscated.
by Anonymous | reply 587 | October 6, 2019 12:31 PM |
We're the Japanese submarines that sneaked into Sydney Harbour in World War 2.
by Anonymous | reply 589 | October 6, 2019 12:32 PM |
I’m the mutilated accent
by Anonymous | reply 590 | October 6, 2019 12:32 PM |
I’m their collapsing dollar
by Anonymous | reply 591 | October 6, 2019 3:25 PM |
I’m Bill Bryson’s Sunburnt Country
by Anonymous | reply 592 | October 6, 2019 3:27 PM |
I'm Banjawarn Station, the middle of nowhere part of Western Australia where the Japanese death cult Aum Shinrikyo tried to built an atomic bomb.
by Anonymous | reply 593 | October 6, 2019 3:35 PM |
I'm Cody Simpson, Miley's latest Aussie beard and the Robert on Masked Singer Australia.
by Anonymous | reply 594 | October 6, 2019 8:48 PM |
I'm the 2020 Most Popular Gold Logie Award. The forerunners for winning me this year will be Dannii Minogue and Lindsay Lohan.
by Anonymous | reply 595 | October 9, 2019 2:25 AM |
I'm the endless, passive-aggressive whining and complaining masquerading as a joke, mate.
by Anonymous | reply 596 | October 9, 2019 2:27 AM |
R596 Enjoy your Gold Lougie Dannii!
by Anonymous | reply 597 | October 9, 2019 7:05 AM |
I'm Dave Allen the Irish comedienne and drunk much beloved in Oz.
by Anonymous | reply 598 | October 9, 2019 8:15 AM |
I'm Radha Mitchell making my acting debut (In a show I'd desperately love to forget).
by Anonymous | reply 599 | October 9, 2019 9:37 AM |
I'm the last post on this thread.
by Anonymous | reply 600 | October 9, 2019 9:59 AM |