How to get back at a Neighbor

What horrid little town do you live in?

Pour bleach on his garden, if he has one.

Hide cracked eggs around his yard/porch, etc. so they will smell rotten.

Subscribe him to some horrid Jehovah Witness Watchtower magazine.

Sign him up at your local Pentecostal church for a home visit.

You can order various bugs online. When they arrive, dump them right at his front door in the middle of the night.

Pour syrup all beneath his bedroom window, and smear a trail right up to the window so ants will invade.

And ALL of R2's ideas will get you sent to jail.

Take your time with this. Good revenge takes careful execution. Create a fake free-clinic type letter, with positive results for a fun STD - let's go with Chlamydia. Go to Office Depot, and have them print out a nice fancy return label. Mail it from across town. Be sure to wear gloves.

Put his house up for sale on Zillow.

I love R2. I need to enlist your help.

You can grab every magazine order card from the grocery or B/N and subscribe them.

Any free samples that a company will mail you.

Request time share information.

Sign him up to receive Scientology literature and take the personality test

Leave him alone. He will try to get even with you and you don't want that.

Are his nearest relatives in the same city or region, OP? If not, Brucine. Unless a toxicology test is performed within the first 24 (preferably 12) hours of death, it disappears without trace.

see below

Salt his lawn.

Wait until a day you know he will be out of town for a weekend. Put an add on Craig's List, moving out, open house, everything must go. If you want it its yours.

Iv seen this done on the news. People literally stripped a house clean including bathroom sinks while the happy neighbor was away. No way to do anything about it. Vultures will break in on their own. Even if the neighbors call the police, at least some of his shit will be gone.

Just make sure you hide your IP from the computer you post the ad from a public place like Starbucks.

If he is straight and married, go buy a bunch of really trashy porn mags with tranies and race play pics. Sign him up for all the free trials bill me later.

Give him four "flat tires". Take a small stone and set in just under the cover on the valve stem. As you screw the top down, but not all the way, the stone will push down and release all the air. No harm done.

Send him shit through the mail, this place will do it for you. Anonymously. You can even pick the kind of poo he should receive.

I wouldn't do anything gay-related, too risky

Maybe reverse psychology. Sing him up for every MAGA event, Whit Power Event, Doomsday Prep-per, Conspiracy theory, Flat Earth etc.

^sign^

[quote] And ALL of [R2]'s ideas will get you sent to jail.

Yes, the jails are just filled with people who have cached cracked eggs around their neighbors' lawns. Judges live to throw the book at people like that.

What else has he done to you OP?

OP here. Thank you for such great ideas. He’s a straight and HIS KIDS COME FIRST!!! He also hates animals.

collect some bowel movements in a paper sack and light the bag up after placing it on his front porch. it worked for some buds I knew back in the day and sounds about right for anyone in love with trump.

Soap his car windows.

Are you guys posting from 2008? Everyone (ESPECIALLY asshole neighbors), has cameras now. Ring, etc. Do this stuff and prepare to have a video recording of uou and your antics posted on your neighborhood's Nextdoor.

My neighbor not only has a bunch of guns and floodlights and cameras, he has the Arlo cameras that record audio. So I can't even (quietly) bitch about him on my own patio for fear that he's listening in.

Put one of these facing his tRump sign.

Sell your house to brown people.

sounds like the neighbor has won. yeah, sell yer house cheap to people he would be offended by.

Take a couple of rotten eggs, slide them into his car hood's air intake at the base of the windshield. The smell will never leave the car interior.

Do you have extra funds? Make a donation in his name to Planned Parenthood, ACLU, or Southern Poverty Law Center in his name ( though PP is obviously most provacative at this moment) requesting a "thank-you card" in his name and a request that your donor name be kept anonymous. Delicious...

Oh, that’s good, R30.

Selling to brown people would drive him batshit.

r4 Jussie?

Sell to Black Jews.

^^^^

R25 is correct. The number one selling device for the home right now is a doorbell with built in cam and WiFi.

Thats why I said up thread, send him some shit through the mail from that company or one of its many competitors. Or do the fake Craig's list thing with a hidden IP.

That actually give me an idea. Post an add on a swingers web site or looking for a dominatrix and have them show up, at different times of the night and during the week. Just the fact that he has to get up and answer the door will ruin his sleep. After a few times, his wife will wonder what the fuck is going on. Better yet, snag his pic off Facebook and use it as his profile.

What a horrible, pitiful little life you have led that a sign in a yard bothers you so much.

You need one of these OP.

Hate fucking him is the best revenge!

Order roaches and bedbugs online. You know the rest...

Just put up a sign for a Dem. candidate in your yard- then you'll be even.

Lol at R27! Like someone already said, there are cameras all over the place...places you wouldn't even suspect. Today, you have to keep in mind that a camera is always on you.. iphones, etc.

Anonymous hate mail is best. Always use a public library computer to create and print it. Once prepared, give it to someone else to place into a mailbox for mailing - usually a child will do it for $5.00. There will be no video of you putting it into a mailbox. No one will suspect a child. If put under oath for testimony later, you will be asked "Did you mail such letter to Ms. Graham?" You and honestly say you did not.

[quote]How to get back at a Neighbor

Move.

It is literally the only way to escape a toxic living situation.

Sell at a loss to a family with multiple and mixed-race foster children.

Is the OP becoming so unhinged over a yard sign that they would resort to vandalism of a neighbor. Sick. What is worse, are the posters adding their two cents on how to "F" with this guy's neighbor. Trump may be an ass...but really...vandalizing someone's home over a yard sign? Op you are one SICK Fuck

You don't respect his Constitutional rights, OP?

Tell us, what kind of reaction do you think is appropriate for him to take against you when you put up your political signs.

[quote]Trump may be an ass

[quote]Op you are one SICK Fuck

I see you expressed a much harsher judgement for OP than the POTUS. Interesting...

If they have kids contact child services and tell them you saw the father slap one of the kids "very hard" on their face and when the kid cried he slapped him again.

CPS will make his life a misery.

"CPS will make his life a misery."

Those kids don't deserve to go through the stress of that on account of the parents being deplorables.

If there's a young daughter, tell CPS you heard her say my Daddy is the best kisser.

I hope the DL posters advocating anything but 'Just pretend the neighbor doesn't exist.' never seriously wonders why they remain unfucked and alone.

R13, your IP address belongs to the device, not the server.

Why is this thread even here? Why not just try to be nice to your neighbor? Trump supporters are not necessarily deplorable.

Exactly R50, not to mention CPS should be dealing with real abuse not made up shit.

It's a shame about the camera, because I Eat Ass sprayed onto his lawn with weed killer would be a nice touch.

Hahaha, good one R53.

sounds to me like he is winning. He lives in your head and creates an anger. No matter what you did to him, it seems it has been and will far worse for you. maybe use that energy to help yourself instead of getting revenge on him.

R55 I know your mind is closed, but that says more about you than it does about trump supporters. I meet people every single day who are good, kind loving people, trying their best to get along in life, and who are just simply tired of hopelessness. Who voted for Trump. Yes, Trump sold them a bill of goods, but the Democrats have just been ignoring them, taking them for granted.

They are not all rabid vicious racists and homophobes. Why not have the tiniest bit of faith in your fellow man?

[Quote] They are not all rabid vicious racists and homophobes. Why not have the tiniest bit of faith in your fellow man?

Because they voted for literally the worst man in the world who never hid his racism, even on the campaign trail. They knew exactly who and what they were voting for.

By definition, they are nasty, evil people and I’ll cheer as they lose their jobs, get sick with not insurance, and OD on opioids

Put up a Resist sign on your lawn and make him mad. Put up cameras so you’ll see if he doesn’t anything to you

Fuck his son and the dog (use condoms and don't do it at your neighbor's place where there are cameras). If he comes over threatening to kill you, shoot him and get off based on "stand your ground" type of self defense.

OP’s neighbor needs a Bark Bell.

R61 OP needs a Bark Bell.

"they voted for literally the worst man in the world who never hid his racism, even on the campaign trail. They knew exactly who and what they were voting for."

This⬆. Times 1,000,000.

life is never ever that black and white. Just once, maybe, just once, try to open your mind a bit to the other guy.