Hideous lamp thread.

I don't even know what the fuck this is?

Yikes!

A classic from "A Christmas Story"

Disturbing

You can't go wrong with the dog pooping lamp.

Some people are really creative.

Beautiful

is that shit, r5? gross!

It probably is. The designer had to make it obvious why the dog is hunched over.

Not as tacky as previous examples but still pretty bad.

r10, it looks like rock candy.

This is going for $150.00. Ridic!

We are not amused.

That is kind of interesting, r13.

From the new Meghan Markle line of fine lighting devices

and the recycled venetian blind shade tops it all off.

Pitifully boring enough to be hideous.

Another dog

Hot ...

Also hot ....

This is kind of fun actually, but I wouldn't want to be looking at it all day.

Viewing might permanently damaged your sight...

The rat taxidermy lamp and Jack Daniels lamp are really something, R21. Maybe I'm a queen with poor taste but I don't mind the purse lamp.

Fun thread

Stylish

------

For the nouveau riche ....

Tiffany or Tiffany-style lamp.

wow, r25.

Wayfair has this.

Whoops. Here we go.

Lord above there's some hideous lamps here!

But so far R21 is winning the thread, and I doubt his entry can be beaten.

I don't know r31? R32 just might have the winner Omfg!

R34 It reportedly won the Kentucky State Fair’s ugly lamp contest

[quote] wow, R25

Yes, words fail. I don't know how you would describe that style -- maybe Goth gone wrong?

I don't know if this counts because it was probably deliberately designed to be tacky.

For religious types

I win! Thread over!

Great choice, R40, and a steal at only $40.

Elegant

Great gift for your musician friends.

^^^ Hahaha, outstanding.

Dust collectors.

I see nothing wrong with R10, and R27 and R42 are fine if you have restored Victorian home.

On the fence with thisChuck wagon with an erection lamp.

God help me, I kinda like this one!

This one too!

It actually is kind of awesome, in a creepy way.

Taxidermy sconces, anyone?

That Jesus lamp is also a clock. yikes!

R48 I see nothing wrong with it, for a cabin in the mountains somewhere.

That's just it though r53. You'd probably need a cabin for it to fit into a scheme. The only reason a covered wagon lamp idea even entered my mind was because I remember an aunt and uncle who had a lit wagon with horses that sat atop their console TV in the 60s that did look good. At least they must have thought so and so did my little self even though they lived in a typical late 50s house

I miss console tvs. They were like having an additional piece of furniture, when needed. I had an aunt who used hers as an extra buffet on holidays, for desserts.

Plus all the tubes inside meant it would keep food warm.

[quote]I see nothing wrong with R10, and R27 and R42 are fine if you have restored Victorian home.

You don't think the crystals at the base of the R10 lamp are a bit much? I'm not sure it would suit a Victorian home. Maybe something more modern. R42 isn't truly hideous, like a lamp with a stuffed rodent, but it is a bit over the top with the three glass discs forming the base.

Yes, R55, but what do console TV's have to do with hideous lamps?

In the 50s/60s decorative lamps were specifically designed to be put on top of console TVs (to reduce eyestrain?) and some are hideous:

I know I would want a lamp with deer feet for a base.

Oh, deer

Another console TV lamp - the kids must have loved this one!

Hmmm. That lamp looks like it's intended for a satanic ritual, R59.

Drip orange mid century lamp

Hand painted harlequin lamps

Fabulous

Seletti Banana Lamp

MacKenzie Childs Highland lamp

What a sad yucky lamp at r64. These flat 80s lamps were always awful.

Lucille Ball wanted to put this lamp in her house but Gary Morton talked her out of it

What's uglier than a dead stuffed alligator?

A dead stuffed alligator deep-throating a light bulb!

I remember the first time I saw one of these oil-dripping lamp things in a department store. My little gay ass stopped and sneered, and asked my mother what kind of tasteless person would ever buy such a thing!

I still wonder.

You know you want this

Every gay man should have one.

Vistosi Murano glass chandelier - looks like bloody steaks.

One of Jay Strongwater's creations.

R75, my first exposure to Murano glass was when I went to Venice as a young gayling circa 1990. In one of the glass shops windows, they were proudly showing a chandelier made of hand-blown glass... that was all "golliwog" faces!

I don't think I've ever seen a piece of Murano glass I liked, but perhaps that tasteless chandelier has prejudiced me against the industry.

[quote]I remember the first time I saw one of these oil-dripping lamp things in a department store. My little gay ass stopped and sneered, and asked my mother what kind of tasteless person would ever buy such a thing! I still wonder.

I first saw one of those when I helped a gay friend of mine move years ago. I sneered at it too (discreetly), but looking at your pic, it's starting to grow on me.

I must be a tasteless bitch because I love R13 ! And R49.

[quote]R75, my first exposure to Murano glass was when I went to Venice as a young gayling circa 1990. In one of the glass shops windows, they were proudly showing a chandelier made of hand-blown glass... that was all "golliwog" faces! I don't think I've ever seen a piece of Murano glass I liked, but perhaps that tasteless chandelier has prejudiced me against the industry.

Interesting story, R77. I'm really shocked they would display such a chandelier in 1990. In the 1920s, that sort of overt racism was more common.

So girly

Dexter's favourite

This one is truly grim too.

That's a femur from a cow, horse, or other large quadruped, R83.

Beyond that, I'm flummoxed.

Yes, R84. The designer was making a real effort to be offensive and he succeeded.

This one is tacky fun.

R57 Sorry, I thought the comma would make it clear that I was making separate observations. I don't see anything wrong with R10, and like you suggest would work in a modern home. I also don't mind R27 and R42 which I think would work in a restored Victorian home.

R15 I have two pair of those lamps. Though without those shades. I think that one is original to the lamp. I love tacky 50s plaster of paris stuff.

OP I kind of think that would be excellent in a guest bathroom with a fringed/beaded buckskin shade.

You don't want to know what my home looks like.

[quote]I remember the first time I saw one of these oil-dripping lamp things in a department store. My little gay ass stopped and sneered, and asked my mother what kind of tasteless person would ever buy such a thing! I still wonder.

My GRANDMOTHER R72!

And it wasn't even the tackiest thing she owned.

I would happily slap down my credit card for the Jack Daniels-swilling dragon lamp, R21.

Phoebe stacked table lamp -- No thanks.

Malibu table lamp - Regina Andrew

Definitely not my taste.

Wild, huh?

What was the tackiest thing your grandmother owned, R89?

If your phone is in a dark corner of the room, it's also useful, R93.

You can't get more elegant.

Who knew gaslighting could be so hideous?

Oops, silly me. If it's got bulbs sticking out of the receiver, you obviously can't use it as a phone.

R96 I would buy that lamp.

[quote]R96 I would buy that lamp.

Well, it does make me chuckle.

This one is probably in Kevin Spacey's boudoir, somewhere near all the rentboy corpses

Many people probably think this lamp is over the top but I like it.

R100 It would be perfect for a breakfast nook or room, maybe even the dining room if it isn't decorated too formally.

R102 I would be surprised if Dolly Parton doesn't own one like it.

Dolly and I have the same philosophy. Less is not always more.

Just goes to show that anything goes in regards to lamps.

Genius.

This bulb is guaranteed to save any ugly lamp from going to Hell.

It's a pug!

R107 Every time I see something like that, I have to wonder is the person who came up with that really a believer in anything other than money? I mean are there now Bibles printed that just leaves out the whole Jesus throwing the money changers out of the Temple? Whether you are a believer or not, I don't see how anyone could read the New Testament and not conclude that Jesus would be sickened by that.

I like the new DL church lady.

bumping

...........

Mermaid!

R110

You want a lamp? Here, take this one!

MacKenzie-Childs Bauble Lamp

Another fan of R13. It looks like something that Amy Sedaris might want to own. It's certainly colourful enough.

Turn your empty liquor bottles into something sanctimonious!

yeh bebeh show me dose lamps

You have to show what you're passionate about.

Nope.

Understated good taste

Chihuly chandelier at the Victoria and Albert Museum. I can't decide whether it's fun or just gaudy.

R124 in a neo-classical space like that gaudy, in the lobby of a cruise ship or casino it would be fun.

Nothing like the Virgin Mary with a lampshade sticking out of her head.

Monks of the middle ages were early creators of hideous chandeliers.

R126 I hope these people really like light, because they will be spending eternity with a lot of flames.

People showing their religious devotion.

[quote]R126 I hope these people really like light, because they will be spending eternity with a lot of flames.

It's hard to tell if these people have really bad taste, or if they're being ironic and kitschy.

This is fun.

Do you know what church or monastery that chandelier is from, R127?

As you probably know R125, Chihuly chandeliers are really trendy. There's a more understated one in Claridge's Hotel in London.

R133 just because they are a trend, it doesn't make them right. For example look at every trend from the 1970s. That chandelier doesn't look right in that space, but would be nice in more modern surroundings.

Any hula dancer lamps?

Very true. It does look out of place.

I don't mind kitschy lamps like this one.

R127 looks like the Sedlec Ossuary in the Czech Republic. Those wacky Catholic monks.

Knight light.

Are you ready to PARTY...

Hat couture.

Lookin' for Goldilocks.

R.I.Pieces

Tall tail.

Tourist tat.

Why pay money for a lamp when you can just stuff some Christmas lights into some empty beer cans?

More money for beer that way!!!

Space oddity.

Head lights.

R146 That's better than most of the shit that has been posted.

At Death's door.

99 bottles of beer on the ceiling, 99 bottles of beer...

I have to say that I like the cheesy knight lamp, R139.

Bend over.

[quote]R146 That's better than most of the shit that has been posted.

.... says the person who would buy the teapot lamp.

Odd but I like it.

Charlotte's lamp.

R154 What can I say, I have a thing for liquid refreshment based light fixtures.

Classic Americana.

This isn’t them, but my grandmother had Blue Boy and Pinkie figurine lamps that I thought were the height of sophistication when I was a kid.

And beside your hideous lamp you'll need a

I'm with R90, I would buy the Jack Daniels guzzling dragon lamp in a heartbeat.

And the mosaic octopus chandelier is classic! Where can I find one of my own??

Wow, 160. That chair looks like it belongs to the leader of a satanic cult.

I posted the mosaic octopus chandelier. It's by Mason's Creations. I hope you have $18,000. Please check out the link.

Disco bead lamp

Don't trip in the dark and fall on this.

The Jack Daniels dragon lamp is much more reasonable -- $90.24.

Here's a dragon with a Smirnoff bottle that lights up, only $72.95 on Etsy! Let's never hear Etsy called Frau Central again!

Oddly, the description says the bottle is Jack Daniels, but obviously it's not.

And the same seller has a unicorn with a bottle of gin that lights up.

This is off topic but you can find some quality stuff on the internet, eg. a toilet paper holder shaped like a knight. Fabulous.

I guess I won't be running out to buy the wondrous stained glass octopus chandelier unless I win the lottery! I still think it's very unique and interesting.

Thanks for everyone posting on where to find the drunk dragon lamp!

That Etsy shop has a lot of interesting lamps.

When your teenager is going through a Goth phase

Not ugly but very odd -- a lamp that conceals itself as a hardcover book.

Lumio Mini Book Desk Light

Lumio Mini Book Desk Light

R164 reminds me of a lamp I had that was made out of glass mardi gras beads from the turn of the century. Whoever made it had fused them all together and it truly was fabulous when lit! I hadnt thought of that thing in 30 years!

Joan Collins night light

Taking the Goth aesthetic to an obnoxious extreme

I want to know if anyone's actually sent for the dragon holding a glowing bottle of booze,

CONFESS!!!

Shame on you R178 - that belongs in the “most stunning and glamorous lamps ever” thread.

[quote]Shame on you R178 - that belongs in the “most stunning and glamorous lamps ever” thread.

Silly me. You're probably right. Only the most sophisticated people have that kind of night light.

This shade is in the shape of a Hyperbolic Paraboloid.

Dollie Alabaster table lamp by Regina Andrew

Jonathan Adler Globo Clear table lamp

Kelly Wearstler Halcyon desk lamp

John Richard Glass Petal lamp

Jan Barboglio Ojo D'Rancho Vidrio lamp

I don't have the imagination to come up with something like this.

Obviously done by a very skilled artist.

Sorry that the previous post is a download. I'm not very knowledgeable about computers and the internet.

r79 has a little invertebrate fetish :-)

Dear God, R195!

R195 might have a winner!!

I think we need a hideous clock thread. This meme inspired me.

This antique Pairpoint "puffy owl" lamp recently sold at auction for:

*wait for it*

Seventy

Seven

THOUSAND

dollars.

I mean if you're gonna drop that kind of money why not acquire an authentic Tiffany 20" Daffodil lamp instead of something that literally looks like a pile of dog shit with two fried eggs on top.

[quote]Dear God, R195!

Isn't it beautiful? I have a phobia about rats. In November, they ran a story about the rat problem in Paris because of construction and because the Seine River is high so their underground hiding places are flooded out. The animal rights activist at the end of the video who keeps rats as pets makes me shake my head.

The video shows a garbage bin in Paris swarming with rats.

Yikes.

I think that lightbulb is coming out of the spider’s spinneret.

Oh my.

Madame Leota is ready to perform the seance, R207.

Now, now. Mdm Leota’s real lamp is much more understated (although still tacky).

This pixie sometimes comes to life late at night in search of someone to finger fuck.

Maybe if the lamp part was changed out with bendable arms or a fierce looking globe?

I think r207's lamp is in Miss Lindsey's boudoir

I don't hate driftwood lamps in general, I just hate R211's example.

Lol, R208.

Excellent choice, R210.

Sexy

The King

r217 for the win!

OP what is that?

Industrial pipe robot lamp

I wonder if they have these at NRA headquarters.

R221, those were a big deal five years ago. They were hot shit.

[quote]R221, those were a big deal five years ago. They were hot shit.

Really? I guess I don't really follow decor trends. They are very slick. To me they just send the wrong message.

What do you know. Gun lamps designed by Philippe Starck. I guess I'm too politically correct to approve of this sort of thing.

They were common in men's salons. Starck knockoffs usually.

To be honest, people stating that migrants are having an effect by not controlling their waste is facilitating this... well...

People from Asia don't give a flying fuck about the planet unless it increases their net worth other than Japan and RARELY some other nations--NEVER in the arid areas. China and India are the worst because of the population density, but the middle east--fucking WRITE OFF. So there's probably a shred of truth to that--especially if they come from poor / religious nations. They don't have ANY real waste collection. The streets smell like feces. I wouldn't be surprised.

[quote]OP what is that?

They look like taxidermied deer legs. You can't go wrong with a lamp made from animal parts.

Yes, R227, but what does that have to do with hideous lamps.

Wrong thread, browser / I is / am retarded.

And I can't find the thread because some fucking idiot didn't include "paris" or "rats" in the title of a thread about rats in paris.

THANKS AGAIN.

mkay

Here, r227, is a lamp you might like.

I actually like this one

A charming oil lamp

another view of the oil lamp

That looks amazing, R234.

r220 is fucking awesome and in no way hideous

The lamp at R220 is too industrial looking for me but it is kind of cool.

[quote]And I can't find the thread because some fucking idiot didn't include "paris" or "rats" in the title of a thread about rats in Paris. THANKS AGAIN.

Yeah whatever, Sanjay the Troll. I'm not falling for any of your little games.

Jesus.

The link to the rats in Paris story is in this thread at r203.

[quote]Jesus. The link to the rats in Paris story is in this thread at [R203].

I think R231 is a troll from my hometown who used to post on the local Topix forum. I think he's criticising me for going off on a tangent about the rat problem in Paris when the subject of this thread is hideous lamps. He's doing it in an obnoxious way, hoping that I will respond in the same way. He likes to stir things up.

I could be wrong about all of this.

He's figured out my IP address and knows which websites I visit.

Spenser Little Red Lamp with Butt Windows

Wood, Steel, Paper and Light | 28" x 22" | 2017

Offered at $6,000

If you hate large roaches, well....

WTF?

For Jack Skellington fans. Kind of cool.

A must for Barbie fans!

Pink lamp with warts

Everybody loves a clown.

A bit aggressive.

Not sure what this is supposed to be.

Why go with the typical lamp shade?

Here’s a good one

Who designed the one at r246 - Ed Gein?

Spooky

More is more

Hippie fabulous

Edgy

Classy

yum-ooooooooooooooooooooooo

?

You revived the thread to say "yum-ooooooooooooooooooooooo"?

r265, actually someone on this thread I've linked in reminded me. I'll give them credit.

Bump

The lamps with a lot of material , such as R259, are fire hazards.

Why beat around the bush? Be clear about what inspires you.

It's not too much, is it? You can be honest...