What is it like dating an actor?

All of that. And terrifying swervy drives through unpaved, unlit, moonless, post apocalyptic desert hellscapes in Joshua Tree. You and the coyotes are the only entities in proximity to hear him screaming insane paranoid accusations at you and there's no way to get a cab or an uber, he owns a gun and his biggest roles have been playing serial killers!

Avoid avoid. Primary narcissism to make even Herr Drumpf look like a comparative model of sanity. They talk for hours and hours about themselves and then at the end wonder why you never talked about yourself. Um, whaddya think????

My "Worst Person in the World" was an actor.

The one profession I will no longer date is actors.

They are all narcissists. Everything must be all about them at all times. Either they’re the center of attention or they get angry and depressed. They need constant reminders that they are wonderful as that acting is the greatest profession in the world.

Some are amazingly good looking, but their looks for the second they reveal these behaviors all actors have in common.

Why society worships them is beyond me.

Can be challenging.

Constant financial worries and no steady income.

Constant ups and downs of auditioning and even when they land the role the play/film/series can be shut down

Lack of steady job means that even mundane tasks like grocery shopping can take up an entire afternoon.

But often fun, creative and generous with attention and time

It's something like this, OP

The hell. Do not do it! Especially no comedians, they all have bipolar issues.

Not a surprise.

My ex dated Wentworth Miller who was in the closet when Prison Break came out. He said he was always scared of people finding out, they couldn't go out together, and he was an insatiable power bottom. But, they both loved each other. Once the show became a success, they broke up and he settled for me. I think it was harder to date someone who dated a celebrity. On my best day, I've never looked as good as WM so that was always in my mind. Another bf dated Sally Fields' son, but I feel OK stacked against him.

You will always be second -- his job is first.

And if he/she becomes super successful, you will be discarded.

There aren't many stories of actors staying with their pre-fame boyfriends. For the record, I think Ryan Murphy is talented but an absolute fucking asshole.

How about a porn "actor?"

It's different in England. The actors I worked with there were normal people in a profession that is appreciated as part of their heritage. They work for a living. Even non-famous actors earn enough to have nice homes and travel. In the US, actors are needy, screwed up, narcissistic, and/or dumb. (sorry, but true.) One difference: if a US actor enters acting with plenty of money and a decent education, they're usually better off. Better able to diversify and be choosy. It's craft/profession (UK) vs therapy (US). As for dating an actor, look for the educated ones who don't need to act.

We are not all narcissists. There are as many sane actors as there are in any other profession. What OP and the other people here are talking about are people who'd be narcissists in any profession.

I would add, r13, that the Brits go to uni to study and learn history, language, et al. Americans will just claim, "I'm an actor" and be done with it. Now YouTube and Instagram is destroying everything.

SNL addressed this issue.

R12 Porn trash or porn scum could never be actors. They are just $200 whores.

The fact so many get involved with wretched cults like the one Tammy is in shows how moronic actors are, other cults as well.

R14 Are you in the industry? Spill. Who's cool and whose a total fuck up?

R16, so did R6.

Fame, like money, changes people but it also changes the people around them. A friend of mine has had some success with tv and movies, not a household name or anything, but he's a nice down to earth very non-actor type. And it was his boyfriend who ended changing once my friend's career started taking off. He was always wondering what celeb he could rub elbows with and post pics on twitter at events and stuff. My friend ended that relationship and unfortunately has not met a decent guy since. They're not all bad.

Random but Queen Latifah was cool as hell, Paula Abdul super sweet, Jada Pinkett Smith really nasty for no reason, and Diane Keaton super cool too. Back in the day Reese & Ryan Phillipe were super low key. Britney was very sweet. We bumped into her drunk at a club (long gone Area) and my friend invited her to a party but was like, "you probably wouldn't want to come". Britney said in the nicest way, "I'm not too good for anyone".

All actors are narcissistic by the virtue of wanting to perform for others. Some are less crazy than others but they will all be most concerned about how people view them.

If they're hot, they usually hide their romantic relationships to keep that fantasy alive for their fans. This applies to straight and gay ones.

Also, if the actor gains any small degree of fame and is good-looking, you will have to deal with insane frau-stans who stalk him and his social media.

Frequently on a site called Datalounge.

R13 Not so fast. Knew a British actor who hid a relationship with a woman for about a year. Hid to the extent that they would have to go places separately. Like let's watch this play three rows apart separately. She wasn't on message according to his flack. You'd know his name.

Acting is among the stupidest professions in the world but actors thing they are the center of the universe.

Dating them is awful

How about dating a closeted lesbian actress who has millions of young men fans who think she's their dream girl?

R27 I wanna know the tea about this one. Would you like to share more?

Do tell, R27. I love gossip about British actors. They're so superior to their American counterparts.

It's fine for the nurturing type of gay who's up to the task of constantly stroking the ego of the actor. To be fair, you can imagine the toll that it takes on someone to be constantly judged on his looks, to be rejected for a part because he's too tall or too short, doesn't photograph well from the left side, is too muscular, too lean, too fat, doesn't have the right screen or stage chemistry with his co-star, even if he's just a two-bit actor in a small city. But the thought of that much effort to prop someone up all the time is exhausting. It's not for the faint of heart, that's for sure.

My psycho in the desert has a serious degree from a good university and then went to the well known NYC arts MFA acting program that has produced many recent Oscar and Emmy nominees. He's perfectly intelligent and has a wide variety of interests, knowledge and talents. And he's still an absolutely terrifying, gaslighting, paranoid sociopath. He was previously and still kinda sorta seriously involved with a UK actor who absolutely also has to be a complete lunatic to have willingly lived in this isolated barren wasteland with him. Both are from minor acting dynasties and so were raised by megalomaniacal phonies.

He thought I was trying to turn his dog against him.

I had a friend who lived in LA and he worked with actors behind the scenes. I asked if he had any info on stars and he said not really. He worked with Tom Cruise often and I asked if he was really gay and he said no. He saw him interacting with his wives and dealt with them at Tom's home and he thought they were real. Tom looks like a washed up old asexual lesbian now so who really cares.

Except for successful actors, it doesn't sound like much fun.

R27, It's Gemma Collins, right?

They're nothing to me it they haven't voiced Disney characters.

R31 Palm Springs?

R13 In the US, actors are more like models. Except character actors, maybe.

It's all or nothing for them: either they become mega-big with every inch of their life scrutinized and magnified, or it's obscurity, financial struggle, BUT freedom. Don't know about creative freedom, seems that they never have it unless maybe they are doing fringe in NYC.

R22 Thanks for sharing. Not a fan of Reese as she is known now and has been for twenty years, but really recommend The Man in the Moon, a Robert Mulligan movie she did when she was about 14. Her best work IMO. Her other best work is Election. The rest I don't watch.

Personally I'd rather date an actor than, say, a cop or fireman.

Dating an actor might be exiting for a while and then you can dump him for some random reason and he's not going to make a big fuss, especially when he's in the closet.

How did things end up with that woman R25?

"But enough about me. Let's talk about you. What do YOU think of me?"

R31, does your psycho in the desert act under his real name or does he have a stage name?

Dating (closeted) actors is a soul crushing experience (being treated like someone's dirty little secret and you may have to lie to your own friends, because - as outsiders - they can't be trusted with the secret that your celebrity boyfriend is gay). Friends with benefits or a fuck buddy relationship on the other hand are less complicated and degrading.

I find they generalize beyond compare, holding everyone to the lowest common denominator. Oh wait, that’s the majority of people responding to this thread.

[quote] Porn trash or porn scum could never be actors. They are just $200 whores.

Wow. You mean I could've held out for $200?

r43...you know him?

Haha, R44. My brother did that. We're not talking, and we were close. It was an eye-opener though, how stupid/low self-esteem he could be.

There's one actor I can think of who could be like that, and who might read as gay though he mostly plays CRAZY. He comes from an artistically successful family going back at least two generations. His grandfather is currently still a huge name - not in acting though.

The reason why I got "interested" in him was that he truly seemed very deranged (apart from "playing" deranged), and I wondered wtf was up with that. The second I looked him up I discovered the famous one was actually his grandfather, who I even have recordings of he's that famous. That came as a complete surprise since I expected him to have been found in the street or something.

Does that sound like it's him?

The only thing worse than dating an actor is dating a BAD actor. You have to keep lying to them about how great they are. It's exhausting over time.

Hahhahaha R51 yes!

A friend from years ago had been an A-list actress. Her career tanked, but just going to the grocery store in LA with her was a chore. She could scan every aisle for someone to connect to with actor-radar. Every task was a chance to score an interview or audition. Exhausting. (Not to mention dressing to go out to yoga.) Total narcissist and thank God, the friendship ended when I left the theatre world. I was no longer of use to her.

Dated a stage actor in a large metro area between the coasts. It was exhausting. Good-looking enough but his amazing body was the real attraction. Super high maintenance. Would try on different personas with different situations and relationships. Could never believe a word out of his mouth. Sex was okay but it was a performance like anything else. It was over by mutual agreement after six months.

One year later, I was at a party and his name came up. I discovered that there was a group of guys who called themselves "Kev's Exes" and would share funny stories about the shit he pulled. I got off relatively easily.

Dating an Actor is a festival of narcissism. I dated an emmy nominated actor for years who thought my cancer diagnosis was about getting his attention. We are no longer friends.

I have to add a tidbit to this conversation: Richard Burton was asked if he was gay (in one interview) and he supposedly replied "Yes!" "For God's sake, I'm an actor and all actors ARE GAY!" From these comments and all the gossip columns I read, it seems to bear out his statement!

That would explain La Liz.

To the person who referred to Ryan Murphy as an asshole. I would go one further and call him a complete sociopath. He is one broken, emotionally fucked man who is likely a closeted trans woman.

I don't know Ryan Murphy, but just by watching his shows you can tell that he is deeply fucked up about women and motherhood. The pregnancy storylines in his shows are always horrific.

Narcisssts. But as someone who works in finance and is very reserved, it is a breath of fresh air and he reminds me to be less uptight and more outgoing. We’re ying and yang - but as I hate attention and he craves it, we work well together.

r50, I think you may have Bingo. Stagelights skip a generation? Original last name starts with M?

the actor I dated was intelligent and I learned a lot from him - we're still friends although we talk very infrequently

R31 Actors raised by actors must be the worst.

R41 They "took a break" while he was away filming. When he returned they started back up with the same rules. It lasted another month before she said fuck it. He wasn't surprised she called time. He knew he was being a shit. He's not hiding his current girlfriend. She's not an actress but is an artist working in another area of the industry. .

That's... pretty fucked R63. So he can only be dating another artist publicly? Plebeians are a bit déclassé.

R1 Not him... There's an M, but it's on his first name and he kept it. His stage name is a variation on his mother's maiden name (also an actress...)

We'd love a few clues here and there about the Brit actor being a shit.

Im obsessed with who the desert psycho might be. How old is he approx?

I want the deets on SAlly's gay son R9

Mine's 45 thereabouts.

I was in a relationship with an actor on a soap. Because he was an actor, I could never tell when he was being honest with me. It lasted seven months,

, and?

r65, nope. Same general age range. The grandpa you'd likely know would be on the other side of the family. Frankly, it's a little distressing to know there's another guy out there who probably has such similar psychological makeup and damage. And they probably know each other!

Hahahahaha! NYC-based?

Let's hope he doesn't, R72. For the grandpa, I'm just going to leave it at Chopin - that's how I know of him. What's funny is this guy has played mostly character parts - either of psychos OR law enforcement! I imagine it's just screenwriters and casting directors being funny. He's done mostly (good) TV since the mid-2000s.

r73, is that to me? If so, the answer is: not for a while now.

It's weird how things that seemed benign, if strange, turn into flashing neon red flags in retrospect. He told me of a nasty fight he had with a lesbian actress whose name comes up here in the context of her work fairly frequently and his response in that situation mirrors part of his psychotic break with me. And then there was all the shit he told me about his supposedly psychopathic brother, which in the aftermath, sure looks like veiled confessions about himself.

r75 is me.

Huh? All British actors make a good living? Brit actors are superior? It’s a respected career path. Um....no. And I say that as a British actor. Lol. I wish I earned a good living but nope we are over here struggling, bartending and being broke too. And I don’t know anybody who respects my craft or think this career is a good idea. I’m an introvert and a very quiet, solitary person so I’m about as far from the stereotype as you can get. I’ve even had casting directors and agents point it out to me. Some appreciate it, some are taken aback that I’m not “actory” enough. I was this close to a job on a US soap in 2013 but I couldn’t get a visa sorted and they went with someone else. It was a very cool experience though and (while a criminal thing to say on DL) I have great respect for American actors. I admire their drive and self belief, I find that the screen acting training and audition technique classes are much better than what we have in London. I think acting is more accessible in the US, many who succeed here come from money which is a major plus. A lot of classism at drama schools too. Trying to keep a roof over my head with a day job has meant missing auditions and turning down nonpayong work........ I don’t have much to add. I have a BA in a non acting field. I haven’t been dating much lately but I’ve dated a few actors and writers and haven’t found them any crazier than the “civilians” but again I’m an introvert and tend to attract likeminded people. My ex went to drama school (Guildhall) and I wouldn’t call the education well rounded or good preparation for a life as a screen actor. He spent most of his time there putting talc in his hair and playing King Lear and Willie Loman.... stepping on a set to do 3 lines in Casualty was a much greater shock to him than it was to me with no formal training but a few year spent doing extra work and observing everything.

Interesting topic to think about as I stay up way past my bed time to watch the Emmys!

R75 was he violent with you?

R77 are you working on anything at the moment?

r78, no, but it sure felt like that was the next step and that if I'd engaged by screaming back at him, etc. that he would have used that as an excuse to escalate into a physical fight. I considered jumping out of the car, but realized: no cell signal, no moon, coyotes and snakes, no one for miles who could hear me scream or see me, and the odds of anyone else driving down that dirt road were slim to none. So, I stayed outside until he pretended to go to sleep, locked myself in a different room and had a friend come get me as soon as they could.

Career obsession, also an expert on a whole bunch of things besides acting, particularly politics, psychologiy, food, travel, talent - just everything really.

The friend who picked me up laughed when I told him who I was with, because of the association with his probably most notable role being playing someone terrifying, and asked me to date someone from My Little Pony next time.

R77 whatever you may think, BRITISH actors tend to be much better than Americans, generally speaking (there will always be exceptions).

Would your first name be Rhodri by any chance?

I figured out one of the people alluded to on this thread.

Now, I must sleuth out the desert guy.

I'll be back.

Which reminds me R1, I once came upon a guy I had seen in a serial killer movie. I recognized him immediately but it just so happened that I recently seen another movie of his where he had a small part, so I just spoke to him and quoted the recent movie - he was surprised and said that's not usually the movie people tell him about. I said nothing and we met again. He needed to practise lines. His line reading was terrible. The main reason why he had been cast in the serial killer movie was because no one else wanted to play it.

Fast-forward many years, I'm watching and enjoying a movie, and we get to the middle of the story, and there's the guy! There's some sort of ellipse and he does the voice-over saying those very lines he had read all those years ago, literally the same it was pretty surreal. Needless to say it took me out of the movie for a while.

For about a year or two he'd kept my phone number and would send me random texts at 2 AM. After a while we just lost touch.

His original training is in design and he has designed stuff like a toilet paper roll for 2 years. Like 2 years worth of toilet paper.

Great work, R84!

R83 I don’t think so, certainly not on screen and definitely not as good at the business part of show business but I’m not invested enough to debate it. After all it may benefit me some day if being British will lead people to think I’m better than I am! No that’s not my name. My roommate is Irish and his name is Rhuadhri but he’s not an actor.

R79 This year has not been the best acting wise. 2017 was decent but my side hustle writing career is coming along and I went to LA to meet with Paramount television and Netflix in August on the back of a spec script I wrote. My gay heart danced going under the Paramount gates as I had a Sunset Boulevard moment. I don’t expect much from the meetings but just getting a meeting felt like a huge success for a shy lad from a council estate in Sheffield. Also I got a pep talk from Celia Imrie at the Polo Lounge and that will probably keep me going for another 2 years!

R82 was that terrifying role in film or TV?

I still much prefer British actors. American work ethic is unbeatable, you're right there.

r88, Dude, come on, this isn't a blind item or a #metoo bid. r43 sounded like he knew him or knew him by reputation from similar behavior. I did consider making a small (horror) video game with Unity about that night called something like Weekends With [Name]; if I decide to publicly shame him, it won't be here. Cool?

R87 Good luck with your script!

R90 you realize I have my conspiracy board and red string out right? I'll be up all night wondering.

I'm R43 and I don't know who the initial guy is. I was thinking of someone else.

The psycho desert flashed back the fiction I saw this guy in, and then it was just a series of coincidences - or patterns. I don't even live in the US, I've only watched these people on TV.

R43, you were thinking of M/W.

Who is not gay.

Back to the subject of the thread: There's another actor I've had an ongoing fuck when we're in the same city thing for almost 20 years. He's not very well known, but the things he's shown up in have been mostly very well received critically. Another, probably 75% of America would recognize, though he was recently unknown outside of NYC theater. With both, all of us were always in supposedly committed relationships with other people. So, I would say don't date me or actors, if you're super into monogamy. That just might not be part of the relationship you could rely on.

How do you know R95? Yes I was. I don't know if he's gay. He creeped me the fuck out in that role he did that was so creepy! Years later I saw him again and ended up googling him (for my own protection!) and that's how I found out about the illustrous grandfather.

How in the hell did you find out R95??!! I don't care if he's gay or not, I don't date men since I'm a lesbian.

A friend of mine is a lesbian actress ( British, indie stuff, she also works in other areas of the industry.)

She feels she has to be so deeply closeted for work that she and her gay childhood friend have a mutual bearding arrangement.

The whole thing is quite sad, although they seem happy living together as roommates. Can any of the actors on this thread enlighten me. Why is this so nessicary? If you came out tomorrow his would it affect your career?

That is so depressing, R99. It makes me sad that in this day and age this is the actual life she and her friend have to live.

I live in France. Very few actors and actresses are out. Only recently did I realise an actress who's famously been involved with one of her frequent co-stars might actually be a lesbian or bisexual. Looking at her now (she's been famous for over 20 years) I realise there are some deeply closeted lesbian vibes, or to put it another way nothing very heterosexual going on. And it makes me so sad that this could be the case. That in order to have self-expression she might have had to suppress part of herself. Or maybe I'm completely wrong and she's straight. But I really wonder... Women I've had crushes on like the one I had on her when I was younger were eventually revealed to be gay. There is something profoundly sad about her, when she was a younger it looked like a French chic depression but now I just think she'd deeply depressed. Anyway. This isn't someone I know nor have met.

r99, aspiring actors are taught that they have to market themselves as a brand and to find their "type" and master whatever that is. If you're attractive enough to be a lead (or even supporting, if you're a woman), you need to #1 project fuckability and #2 project "relatability". When you're socializing with actors (in particular), it's extremely difficult to not have what you know about person and your personal interactions with them disrupt the suspension of disbelief while watching them work, no matter the quality of said work. So, casting directors, directors, producers, etc. are never even going to think of someone who is Gay From Space to go on the list of people to consider for a role that isn't Gay From Space. And, similarly, if the actor's public persona is Gay From Space, (primarily straight) audiences have a cognitive disconnect seeing that person play anything too far afield from the "character" that is their public persona. It's all very detrimental to art, particularly this boxing in of "types" that leads to super boring casting decisions and most actors really never even having the opportunity to do much acting. But there's enough competition that *everyone* is disposable so the game never changes.

At a party I saw across the room a guy who looked like an actor who wasn't exactly famous, but had supporting roles in a few critically-acclaimed movies in the 1980s (this was twenty years later!) So anyway I tell my friend that guy looks like so-and-so. It was uncanny, he looked a lot like him but he couldn't have been the same guy because he was too young.

Turns out the guy at the party is an actor too. He wants to know immediately who is this actor that he looks like. As if his life depended on it. Then once he gets the name decides that really sucks since it isn't the first time he's been told that he looks like that other actor. Just really bizarre. Never thought something so innocuous could be so career-threatening. But it is, apparently, since they market their face.

Employed or unemployed? Really Famous? Semi Famous?

What R103?

I dated an actor once. The only way I could get him to stop talking about himself was to sit on his face. He was still babbling on about his agent as he lost consciousness.

Yes. And you have to be realistic. Look at Lea DeLaria. If the world was fair would Lea be cast in a wide range of roles that allow her to show her range? Sure. But it’s not so she gets cast as a butch dyke. I heard her interviewed recently and she joked she’s about to shoot a movie where she plays a butch lesbian from X. And the host and I laughed at the same time because the only range Lea gets is that the butches she plays come from different places. And if Lea had studied in Britain and then taken private classes from Meryl Streep while simultaneously researching a thesis at Harvard, she would still be playing butch lesbians.

For an actor who doesn’t look as obviously gay they still have to deal with the prejudices of casting directors and agents. If a casting director finds out an actor is gay they can start to hear a “gay voice” they never noticed when they assumed he was straight.

And then there are actors who don’t have the versatility to play straight and that has to be accepted too but if the actor is delusional who breaks the news? I have a friend who is a ‘yaaas qweeen” twink who wears makeup and who submits himself for roles like “Todd is an investment banker engaged to Ruth” and then wonders why he never gets any auditions. He doesn’t think roles like “sarcastic hairdresser” stretch him! His drama school convinced him that everyone can play every character. They let him play women and men. All the 20 year old kids were playing middle aged characters. He hasn’t yet accepted that he’s now in a business selling a product and that the last part of typecast is cast which means a check in his bank account.

Like someone said above the university drama programs don’t prepare kids for the business at all. I weep for the parents when these kids have to come out of $$$$$ MFA programs and then spend a year or two at Groundlings unlearning everything. And their faces when they do book a gig and realize there will be no rehearsal, you will meet the other actor on the set 30 seconds before they roll tape, you will get no notes on your performance, the director will be far more interested in the position of a light than you and you’ll work 14 hour days. The environment is about as far from a college drama class as you can get.

Sarcastic hairdresser, haha

R59 - and I guess you pay all the bills too, right?

I love Lea’s cameo in First Wives Club and sorry but no straight actress could have played that role properly. I don’t care if she went to Juilliard or Yale. Sometimes you need someone to just “be” rather than act.

R106, There are a few programs (very few) that do prepare you for the industry properly and surprise, surprise, those are the ones where most successful actors come from. I feel bad for everyone else who didn't have the good fortune to get into those programs or didn't know they had that aspect to them.

R59, had it right when he implied that it takes a certain kind of person to date an actor. I'd say that applies to most actors but not all. Those types of actors need someone who is not in the industry and the polar opposite of them to have a long lasting relationship. You need to be comfortable being second fiddle occasionally and propping up a person who needs it constantly.

There are a few actors who are decent, well balanced people but they're likely in it for different reasons than some. They don't necessarily want to become famous. They're not using it to gain attention or to fill a void in their heart from whatever childhood trauma they've suffered. It's odd but those ones also aren't necessarily the most successful in the long run. Occasionally a decent person does get through and become famous. Those are probably the ones the public thinks are boring.

I'm an actor who dated an actor just once. I've always done well to okay work-wise. I'm not famous but a few people know who I am. I haven't had to do any other work besides acting in years.

That actor boyfriend of mine at the time was not doing okay. That was the first problem. I always spent time trying to make myself smaller (and I'm already very small) while propping him up. The second problem was once he started doing okay he immediately became insufferable. When someone gains money, fame or power you quickly find out what kind of person they are. If they were great people before with no underlying issues they usually remain that way. I've seen it many times. If they weren't or there were some latent problems below the surface that only one of those three things can bring out then it will come out. We broke up quite a while ago. Last time I looked him up he was just in a film. I'm not sure if he ever bothered to fully come out.

R110 You sound grounded and authentic. Not many of those around.

Where are most successful actors coming from these days? I know the schools churning out musical theatre chorus boys because I read my Playbills. Lol. But where are TV actors coming from? At one point they were all coming to NYC first and studying at the Neighborhood Playhouse and HB Studios. Then I think those guru teachers in LA produced a few famous faces and all the actors went there to train. Then it seemed everyone was coming out of improv schools. What’s the trend now?

And r110 in my business too (I’m a hair colorist) driven people with a maniacal need to prove someone wrong - the high school bully, the neglectful parent, the abusing spouse are the ones who tend to make it and get their own salons and product lines despite being neurotic and unstable and not easy to work with the super grounded, chill, hard workers rareky make it off someone else’s payroll.

R100, is it S/T?

R98, are you a British lesbian?

If so, I'd much rather hear more about you!

Ha! r106, so true.

I'm not a fancy conservatory-trained actor, just some time at a grade-B drama school and lots of independent classes. Still after many half-assed, fallow years doing nothing, I finally started working in some film/tv gigs and it is quite like you say.

I love it! I am the type who just wants to DO IT, and endless rehearsals bore me to death. I love how the directors just tell you where and when you need to be and then you just fill in your performance. I actually find it fascinating. Getting a bit of performance direction is a rare treat, and it's nice feeling I must be doing just fine if they don't say anything!

It used to be said -- in the 80s -- if a man were straight and really good looking, and could act reasonably well, his success was assured, in film and theatre. There were so few straight male actors. IN that regard, things are different now.

I am an actor. As in a line from All About Eve, we ARE "a breed apart from the rest of humanity" and, in my personal opinion, actors should only date OTHER actors or artists. Because we view the world in a different way. And there MUST be some degree of narcissism (it's not always a "bad" thing) or we would not be compelled to perform, period. It is what fuels us, nurtures us, motivates us. There is a book called The Artist's Way that explains this. Not all actors are assholes but we do have a different "energy." And we wear people out. I fully understand that.

There are plenty of people who are narcissists who are NOT performers and they are the most dreadful to me. At least many/most performers (singers and actors and dancers) are entertaining and have talent. Some handsome accountant or corporate executive who is all stuck on himself? So deadly dull.

Absolutely r115 Drama schools and classes are so collaborative and there’s so much feedback and direction and nobody thinks to tell you TV/film won’t be like this! I’m actually a bit embarrassed about all the classes we had where we walked around pretending to be animals or doing trust exercises or doing monologues where we played 60 year old men. I learned more in one day of extra work. Grrrr. There’s no one path that guarantees success or that suits every actor but I never recommmend undergrad acting programs for people who want to work on screen. On the other hand I’ve also learned from Lisa Kudrow’s story. She took audition class and learned audition technique so well she booked a show but then got fired because there was no acting technique to back it up.

One of my favorite resources is the Emmy Archive interviews. Very insightful. Every persons journey is so different but 90% of the actors, writers and directors are solid people dedicated to their craft with a very good knowledge of the business side too. I sometimes direct non actor friends with an interest in learning about show business there because it’s easy to think we’re all flighty, neurotic, drug addicted messes who are either sexually abusive or putting up with sexual abuse and of course that couldn’t be further from who I am or what I’ve experienced in the industry. I can’t remember the last casting I had where most people in the room weren’t gals and gays actually so always a comfortable, supportive environment and never anything shady.

R116 When I first came to LA there was a huge community of male actors then 60+ who had earned very comfortable upper middle class livings playing small roles in tv. They were the judge, lawyers, taxi driver, store clerk. Back in the day all parts like that were cast male by default and these guys made a great living. Just as good as their neighbors who were dentists and doctors. I thought they were better off than gorgeous guys who couldn’t maintain any type of longevity. Guys like Clint Walker who were breath takingly handsome and built like action heroes were screwed if they didn’t make the big time.

I dated an actor who was terrified people would find out he was gay even though he wasn't really famous (maybe you could call him semi-famous if you are being generous). I guess he did a pretty good job of closeting himself because at least one poster here claimed to know for sure that he is straight! LOL.

R117 Good point. Out of college I moved to SF to work at a tech company and lasted 6 months. The most toxic, draining bunch of people who talked about nothing but money. I remember my supervisor hadn’t been outside the city in 3 years because he counted every hour of his life as being worth $60, he cashed in his vacation time every year. I’m not sure what his goal was or how much money would have been enough to fill his void but it was all so soulless and then most of the straight programmers were on the spectrum and 90% of them seemed like potential mass shooters. My ex worked on Wall St for a while and also ran screaming with a similar impression of the people he worked with. I loved the stress free environment in my former civil service job but nobody had any ambition and this was as far as they were going to go in life. So, there’s probably no profession that attracts perfect balanced people and on the whole actors are probably no better or worse fund managers. Personally I’d marry 10 actors before I’d even date an engineer because of my personality. And I can see how someone in finance or tech would enjoy the contrast of coming home to an artist type

I do semi-pro theater in a mid-size American city. We tend to be decent folk who all have day jobs and other careers as you can't live on a $500 stipend once a quarter. The drama tends to be among the artistic staff and the stage crew, not the cast. Many of us had NY or LA careers once upon a time until life put us here and careers/family/other responsibilities keep us here. We still do some good work.

R111, Thank you R111. Maybe if I weren't I'd be more successful; although I'm not sure I want that. My dog would tell you that I can be quite exhausting. :)

R112, Glad to hear, I'm not sure glad is the word, that this applies to other fields as well. It's sad because I'm not sure how anyone who already isn't that kind of person can become that kind of person. I guess the lesson is those kinds of people get things done because they have the drive to.

R118, I know this is off subject but the animal exercises were the most insane thing I've ever done. This is going to be the subject of my nightmares tonight. I just wanted that period of time we did that in class to be over. I'm pretty sure I intentionally missed class the day we had to perform our final one. I can't remember if we chose or if were given our animals.

The improv stuff we did I feel was helpful. I do remember in my classes that they were very adamant about both stretching us to play other kinds of roles outside of our type then forcing us to realize that we all have a type and playing those roles/doing monologues related to those roles in class and outside. It was a harsh lesson but they felt like it would be the most helpful. Many of us felt we were castable as one kind of thing but found out we weren't. I remember complaining that I was always getting stuck doing certain things and then we spent a week finding out our "types" from strangers and classmates and I found out I was getting cast in class exercises and other projects exactly how people saw me. (Funny best friend, kind authority figure or some kind of a helper but not a romantic lead or any kind of lead.) Also you're dead right. Most people don't give a damn about giving you time to figure out the "circles of concentration" or "the magic if." You have to internalize all the stuff you learned, pick out the parts you can use and do the mental math to make sure you're "listening" and not "indicating" and all of those other good things and just do it.

Do the work before you get there then get there and do the work.

I'd say I learned more about business and acting from taking classes outside of school as an adult. It's very important to learn from and work with people who are on top of things and working. The industry changes all the time and those changes aren't necessarily visible to people on the outside. Something as simple as getting a head shot done can be very complex. For example: a few years ago we were told we needed at the minimum 2 head shots, one shoulder up, one 3/4ths, 1 inch border on two sides, some measurement of border on the other, stapled resume to the back that is printed and cut to a certain specification, with the staples aligned to the border where the photo meets the white part of the frame so they're almost invisible, name always on the right but 10 years earlier than that it was completely different and it may even be different now.

[quote] I am an actor. As in a line from All About Eve, we ARE "a breed apart from the rest of humanity" and, in my personal opinion, actors should only date OTHER actors or artists. Because we view the world in a different way. And there MUST be some degree of narcissism (it's not always a "bad" thing) or we would not be compelled to perform, period. It is what fuels us, nurtures us, motivates us.

Yours is a high and lonely destiny!

Have a question if there are any Shakespearean stage actors around. How the fuck do they remember hundreds of pages of dialogue? I cannot imagine memorizing one page.

R124, memorization really becomes second nature very quickly.

Not all actors are the same. I'm an unsuccessful character actor pursuing musical and straight theatre in NYC. I have no problem getting unpaid and very-low-paid work, but consider myself unsuccessful because I have never made a living wage from performing. A little background on me: I'm a native New Yorker and have always loved theatre. I started singing as a tween and acting a few years later. I have a Master's but went to the wrong schools/programs which gave me a great basis for craft but virtually nothing about the business side of things, which experience has taught me is significantly more important in "making it." I don't consider myself a narcissist since I am actually VERY shy/introverted when not performing. And in fact, most actors I know are not narcissists and are actually highly intelligent. That said, I have never been in a relationship or even really "dated" because as others have said, my career is my biggest priority and I don't want to make a potential partner feel like a second fiddle.

Everyone who gets into Juilliard is handed a career on platter, if they want it, but this is after the program has wiped out any trace of natural talent in them and morphed them into awkward, stilted, phony automatons. Chastain is the only exception to this that I can think of in that she can still believably portray a human being.

Rubbish R44 not having a well-paid, decent job is degrading, being chronically ill to the point of shitting yourself and always needing someone to do basic things like going to the toilet or taking a bath is degrading. Dating a gorgeous, successful actor that is in the closet is just life and a pleasure. No-one needs to know your business and if your 'friends' can't keep their trap shut then they are not really friends.

Carnegie Mellon is another one R127.

You'd need more than 10 fingers to count all the grads from that school currently working.

There are a surprising amount of straight men in LA who are conservative, uptight, have no formal acting training, but are pursuing acting. They are narcissistic, needy for attention and validation, and think they can have a successful acting career playing roles that are just like themselves.

I’ve dated one and another was just a fuck buddy (both on shows that have been discussed on dl), and yeah, to parrot what everyone else has said, it was not a great experience. The guy I dated, I was deeply in love with, and he was great at acting like he was in love too. But he changed on a dime, which is something I wasn’t used too. Ah well, the joys of dating in LA.

@R131

[quote] I was deeply in love with.......

LOL!

But I was! Haha

[quote] And there MUST be some degree of narcissism (it's not always a "bad" thing) or we would not be compelled to perform, period. It is what fuels us, nurtures us, motivates us. There is a book called The Artist's Way that explains this.

The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron? That's not what the book is about at all. It's about removing mental blocks and insecurities that prevent us from being creative. It's about finding the inner artist in oneself and to learn to nourish our creativity.

R95 R114 I am not a British lesbian... I visit London once or twice a year.

Meant R98

The other way around. Meant to sign R98.

I want to know who the dickhead British actor who hid his girlfriend is...is he really, really famous or just a bit famous? An age range maybe? TV or movies?

[Quote] Also, if the actor gains any small degree of fame and is good-looking, you will have to deal with insane frau-stans who stalk him and his social media. Frequently on a site called Datalounge.

You forgot me.

r128 just shut up, you worthl p.. o.. s..

Executive Summary: You can never know when they’re sincere or pretending. Worst bit: often nether do they. Every day of our lives civilians act, bit luvvies of the Corps Theatrical take it to a new psychotic dimension. Run!

Lot of drugs and resulting psychosis. Always.

R68 you want the details on Sally's son but you don't ask about Luke? Sad.

Has anyone else in the industry noticed the fucking religious devotion to raw veganism? Its a socially acceptable form of anorexia for actors.

My best friend growing up became an actor. In his late 20s, he had some success with a featured role in a movie and then a supporting role in a TV series. Things were looking up. He and his girlfriend, also a promising model/actress, were the "beautiful couple" in our group. They had a gorgeous wedding, bought a cute bungalow, etc., etc. And then things changed. The show got cancelled. He never got another role like the early ones, and has had a series of guest star roles on TV and basically cameo roles in movies, plus some commercials. She has aged out of the eye candy era and now teaches yoga. They put off having a child until that next big payoff came but somehow it never did and now, 15 years later, he's studying to get his real estate license. He didn't want to be seen in some other kind of job before because it would "hurt the brand."

"My ex dated Wentworth Miller who was in the closet when Prison Break came out. He said he was always scared of people finding out, they couldn't go out together, and he was an insatiable power bottom. But, they both loved each other. Once the show became a success, they broke up and he settled for me."

I'm glad Went finally came out! It's sad when actors think they have to live a lie to get work.

The only actor I know is and older (70) man who made his living doing bit parts in various television series and films. He and his wife are two of the nicest people I know. Devoted to each other, politically active with absolutely tons of friends of all ages and walks of life.

I don't think all actors are bad. Far from it. Even when I was doing community theatre back in the day, you had the ones who did it for the love of the craft and wanted to tell stories (those were usually the ones who you actually WANTED to watch and who knew what they were doing) and you had the attention whores always entering a fucking Applebee's as if they were on a goddamn red carpet and talking about themselves in a loud, shrill stage voice (these were the ones who usually had zero talent and seemed to be trying to overcompensate). They were unable to not be "on."

The best actors I know are usually quiet and down to earth people. They do it because they love to tell stories and love to brighten people's day and make them smile, laugh, cry, or think. The over the top diva ones are acting that way because they know they aren't good enough and they could be found out at any point, so they might as well live it up while they can.

Still, no matter what, it's a shaky profession and even the good ones don't get work for long periods of time. Sometimes, you almost have to create the work yourself.

I wonder if the Desert Horror Story guy has ever seen SEVEN PSYCHOPATHS?

You should. Great flick that’s right up your alley.

R145 That's horrible, can they still have children at this point? At least they're still together. And she found a meaningful career, or what sounds like it.

Speaking of yoga, I found out recently that an actress that I've seen and enjoyed in supporting parts for over two decades seriously considered quitting acting and focussing on yoga instead a few years back, not so long ago. Eventually she did what R148 wrote about. She created the work herself.

Harley Jane Kozak was an actress I liked a lot some 25 years ago. Physically sort of a blonde Margot Kidder, who I also liked a lot. Well, Harley Jane quit acting a long time ago and has been writing light crime novels ever since.

If one is hard to cast (i.e. too thin for the fat friend roles and too fat for the leading man/woman roles), creating one's own work really does help. Plus, there's something nice about being in control for the first time in your career. My friend did that and made an indie movie that's gotten pretty good reviews and a minor distribution deal. Who knows what will come of it, but hey, she actually DID something. So many people say they want to do something, but they never do.

I am R95!!!!!

R66 Won't give clues to his identity but I can give details on some of their hilariously pathetic "dates". Going to the cinema and theatre and sitting apart. On one occasion he went with a friend so he had someone to sit with, she sat alone. They met up at his house later. Going to an art exhibition, walking around separately, and TEXTING each other their thoughts about the paintings. He thought the texting was a brilliant way for them to be together without actually being together. Going to a special event at RADA and you guessed it, sitting apart and not interacting at all during the pre-event champers do. Travelling separately to middle of nowhere England for a weekend holiday. It was middle of nowhere and not London so they did things together. Funny thing is the current girlfriend who is considered more on message by his PR is not half as pretty as the one he hid.

R155 What was considered " Off message" about her? Was it a racial thing? Also what a total dickhead.

It was like 3AM when I posted, I got mixed up. Sorry R95. No one's trying to steal your identity on DL.

Just the fact that she's in a different line of business, I'll bet. That guy is a complete pussy, and that of course is an insult to all female genitalia and also cats in general.

R157, but you're not British or American. Are you from Europe?

Correct, R159.

I live close to this place.

It is beautiful.

If I lived in a place that looked like that, I would not spend a second of my life online.

A couple of years ago I spotted a small (shortish), old lady at Whole Foods in Beverly Hills. BH if full of them, so that was nothing unusual, but then I realized that the old lady could not have been that old because she was Jodie Foster's ex. None of us look our best when grocery shopping, but there was something about her made me think how hiding in the closet for your famous spouse will drain you of life (especially when you get dumped for a younger piece who gets to have a wedding announcement!).

I don't know if anyone is worth walking twenty feet behind them on the red carpet.

It's still 8 km from where I actually live. It would take me nearly 2 hours walk just to reach it. And I'm very lazy. Strangely enough, I hike mostly when I'm away. Very strange.

I live in the suburbian end of what used to be a small village, and sort of still is - with suburbia attached to it.

You're right, R164.

Speaking of which, I was hiking in suburbia two years ago and while I am not 100% sure, I saw a vaguely famous lesbian get out of her house to take out the trash. She looked like shit. I hate the bitch (for being a phony and a manipulative asshole), but fuck did she look worn out. She's a bit younger than yours truly, looked much worse for the wear. Not an actress though, but in the movie biz BTS.

R167, oh my gosh, I doubt that there is one person on DL who could possibly name who a lesbian in the French movie business, but not at actress could be.

By the way, you are not originally from a Southern European country? (There was a lady on DL a few years back that I corresponded with for a few weeks over a shared love of Julie Gayet.)

That might have been me... I saw Julie Gayet on her bike once, ten years ago. Gosh she was pretty. Beautiful, in fact.

R95, if you are the lesbian from the opera thread, I'm sorry I haven't written. What I thought I wanted to say that was so important got all mushed up in my head.

R169, yes! It's me! I remember that also your brother does La Jaoui's hair.

R170, yes, I'm the same person, too.

SCARY

My God, the generalizations here are absurd, but not surprising. Certainly those who are relating their own experiences must have been involved with the cray-cray, super narcissistic, needy type. Yes, there are some kooks in the acting profession. But the community of theatre/tv/film actors, writers and directors I work with are, for the most part sane, intelligent, sensitive and not crazy. I'm an actor and have even dated a few who were great guys.

Agreed. Cray cray, bitches be.

More actor stories, bitches.

Quote : "the only actor I know is an older (70) man...."

(R147) Who is this actor ? What's his name ?

Yes. We need to know.

(R147) If you don't name him your "testimony" is not interesting at all !!!!!!! Haven't you learn anything from Datalounge ??????

This is the best thread in ages! My first guess for the Dickhead British actor would have been Ben Barnes since he hides who he dates. But it sounds like DBA new GF is known to be dating him and seen in photos? Which would eliminate B.B.

I think possibly it is Richard Madden - currently dating a woman in the fashion industry, dated Jenna Coleman for a while but there were a couple of other women in between.

I'm related to a successful actress and she can be the most funny and interesting person you would ever meet, but also the nastiest, most insecure person, depending on the day. She needs anxiety meds but won't take them because she thinks they affect her abilities to act and be creative.

If you are in Europe, you might know of her - she does tv shows.

"My first guess for the Dickhead British actor would have been Ben Barnes since he hides who he dates."

He isn't dating females

R183 how do you know? We speculate he is bi?

My next door neighbor is a successful TV actor who has had several high-profile supporting roles in feature films. She and her husband are so normal and nice! They don't have kids, but go out of their way to be really friendly to the kids on the block. At Halloween, they decorate extravagantly and spent a few minutes with each trick-or-treater.

They came to the 'hood July 4th pot luck, sat around and drank, watched the fireworks. Just normal stuff. She cut out a bit early because the car would be there soon to pick her up for work (fall season began shooting in late June), but her husband stayed until almost everybody else left.

As far as DATING... I dated an aspiring actor who lived in my apartment building in West Hollywood, back in the late 1990's. He went to Texas A&M and moved to LA to get into the "biz." He managed our building (free rent) and waited tables at an expensive restaurant. He had a couple national commercials and bit parts in a few blockbuster movies, but not much else. Our dating lasted for about five months, until I realized how deeply damaged he was. I think that when somebody sets their goal as being a famous movie star and it does not happen, they fire the blame gun at everybody around them. He was good in bed and decent looking, but he was a shitty friend to almost everybody he knew. Just looked him up while writing this and see he's working an office job now in West LA.

You know, for all we talk about stand-up comedians being damaged, at least they mostly tide themselves over creatively during dry spells be starting podcasts, getting into a little political commentary, maybe a one-man/woman theatre show. Struggling actors are really SOL without bookings.

I was a "location boyfriend" for a low-level actor in a couple of famous series. Meaning we hooked up on Grindr until he accidently spilled the beans that he had a boyfriend back home that he was having problems with due to his "fame" and the boyfriend's non-starter of a career. Honestly, this guy considered himself the next Meryl Streep when he was like wallpaper with a couple lines and I ran for the hills.

My other experience was with a DL fav, who I didn't hook up with, but I'm fairly certain he pretty much fucked guys for money at that point in his career. I was in production at the studio on the project he was in and he was a royal pain in the ass. I couldn't imagine even being friends with him much less being in a relationship. I have yet to (in 10 years of entertainment biz) meet a gay actor that I'd want to date. It's like being gay ramps up the attention getting tenfold.

Interesting. Nice to hear real gossip.

Not knowing the names makes the gossip a lot less interesting.

Sure is a long thread. Has anyone mentioned musicians?

This thread makes me think that DL really does get invaded by trolls and publicists--this thread hasn't shown up on their radar because few names have been mentioned and it doesn't sound like it's about celebrities. So no one's come in to derail the thread.

How do they derail those threads?

What R189 said.

I met one of my favourite actresses quite by accident during a train ride (she decided to sit next to me), and she was charming, personable, endlessly interesting. Met her again some 6 or 8 months later, could be that she didn't recognise me but she shot me a dark look like she hated every fiber of my being. Could be that she didn't remember and was in a bad mood that day. We didn't speak at all. But you never know.

(R191) DL have always the "inside dope", that's why people ask so many questions about celebrities and middle famous or not not famous at all artists (in general).

I didn't learn anything. I'm a little bit disappointed by the Data loungers.

Not the people mentioned. I should have said that he hasn't been photographed with the new woman or appeared at public events with her. But he's introduced her to friends and goes out with her and not just to places he has an NDA with.

I dated a Brit actor for about two years. He was extraordinarily self absorbed, aren't they all?, but he believed he had a highly evolved social conscience because he'd attend the odd Oxfam or Minority Rights event

The end came one evening when I pointed out that he was acting selfishly and he responded "I'm an artist. All artists are selfish.". I paused then laughed until I nearly cried. What an absolute insipid and delusional twit

r198, how did that relationship last two years?

I have a good female friend who started as your basic model/actress/waitress and then morphed into producing. She was once engaged to a true DL icon who went from landmark TV show to Broadway star. She dumped him when he went out on tour and knocked up some one night stand. She was in her early 20s when she was with the actor, who was 20 years older. That was about 30 years ago. She said never again would she date an actor because they're not real people. Always playing a role even in life, always terribly insecure, always narcissists. She's been friendly with actresses from time to time but has nothing good to say about most of them due to their neurotic, demanding attitudes. She said that at a certain point, actors and actresses start believing their press releases and that they actually said the things attributed to them in the p.r. puff pieces and that's when they start to lose their grip on reality. She knew Aniston when Aniston was making the rounds looking for work and said that she, more than anyone else, went from basically decent person to unbearable cunt in record time.

[quote]who started as your basic model/actress/waitress and then morphed into producing

(facepalm)

This belongs in the unspoken rules in Hollywood thread.

R117’s post should be framed as an example of why people hate actors. Three overlong, over wordy paragraphs to say “I’m an asshole who has a desperate need to be looked at and discuss all the minutiae of my fascinating personality every minute of every day or the world will melt into the sea.”

PS. Most of you are not as good looking as you think you are. And you are all, mostly, so stupid it’s draining.

There was a waiter I met once or twice through my gf who was waitressing at the same bar. He had been a model some ten years before. I had been warned about his modelling. His face was puffy, his hair was thinning on top not that that's really anyone's fault, he was vapid, pretentious, boring, overtly hostile, and he stole from the cash register of course. The bar went under about a year or two after.

R200, I remember reading something similar about Aniston--in maybe Salon, but years and years ago (early years of Friends). Writer was also an actress, I believe, but Aniston went from nice/normalish to self-involved/self-important. Also, I think, there was some indication that she was extremely competitive and willing to be pretty underhanded when it came to getting parts--not casting couch--but bitchy games when it came to other actresses. I think Aniston's name wasn't used, but it was completely obvious who it was.

Show biz attracts a lot of people who want to be noticed and will do what it takes to be noticed. Add the coddling and flattering that happens if an actor's successful and you really do have the making of a monster. There are exceptions--there are people who are genuinely in it because love to act (or sing or whatever), but they're the minority. In part, I think, because acting is such a godawful profession that a number talented, sensitive artist types just can't deal with it. I went to a college that has produced a number of successful actors, including a few from when I was there, but those successful actors weren't actually the most talented actors I saw there. They did have, however, a certain amount of social wiliness and/or connections. (And, no, I have zero interesting gossip, sorry.)

Has the Joshua Tree desert actor been figured out?

R204, good post, even without goss.

Where did the original Euro girl go?

This thread is very judgmental and offensive. A lot of vast generalizations being made too. Sad.

Dating an actor at every stage of his career is unpleasant.

When he is struggling and working sporadically, you will have to pay for everything. You will have to drive everywhere and pay for gas. You will have to praise him, be his cheerleader, let him know everyday he is good-looking, and has star potential, a true artist.

If he is fortunate enough to make a living as an actor, he will be gone for 12-16 hour days regularly, often traveling out of town for half the year or more if he works in films. Obviously, since he is rich, famous, horny and out of town, he will have sex with multiple partners. Relationship over.

r32, I never understood the tom gay rumors either. Like he has never been known to hook up with men; never. No ever has come forward to say that he has slept with Tom on this site on or any other gossip blogs.

Who is the desert person?

[quote]I had a friend who lived in LA and he worked with actors behind the scenes. I asked if he had any info on stars and he said not really. He worked with Tom Cruise often and I asked if he was really gay and he said no. He saw him interacting with his wives and dealt with them at Tom's home and he thought they were real. Tom looks like a washed up old asexual lesbian now so who really cares.

There were rumors R210 but like you said, no one has personally said anything.

I can't give more details but in my experience too, (I'm not R32) he is straight and his last relationship was real but nobody ever believes that.

When I discovered that, it was the first time, I learned to doubt gossip I've heard on pretty much every celebrity I'd dealt with over the years.

That's not to say he may not have slept with men many years ago, but over the period of time (days not just a few minutes or hours) I was around him & his then wife, I didn't even get an inkling of that.

[quote]r30 It's fine for the nurturing type of gay who's up to the task of constantly stroking the ego of the actor.

I'm wondering what responses could cause an on-the-spot breakup.

"Forget what THEY said....do YOU think you could have pulled that part off?"

"Tom said you were once really good at computer programming."

"Are you gaining weight for a role?"

I hate it when people say actors they’ve met for a couple minutes are “super sweet!” You do realize they want you to think that, right? Their little interaction with you doesn’t tell you a thing about them. I’m always nice to fans too but that doesn’t make me “an AMAZING PERSON!” As for relationships, I met my husband 24 years ago when I was unknown. Then, 13 years ago, I hit it big and there was a bit of an adjustment. My bipolar disorder was triggered and I wasn’t sure I wanted us to spend the rest of our lives together. But we made it through and got married 6 years ago. As for the bipolar disorder, I take medication and am fine now but initially, it was a hellish rollercoaster. We’re very happy now. I love him very much.

To the poster who said “Acting is the stupidest profession in the world,” I ask you: Could you go the rest of your life without any TV, film, or theater? I personally think acting is very important. Of course, why else would I do it?

R87- Believe in yourself!! You got a meeting, now book the job!

R96- I don’t think there are actors anymore that “75% of America would recognize.” There’s SO much content. Everyone is watching different things. I mean outside of Tom Hanks, Tom Cruise, Julia Roberts, and The Rock, most even "really well known" actors aren’t known by a huge section of the country. I mean a hit TV show is watched by like 20 million people. That’s like 6% of the U.S. population.

As for being a gay actor, it is of my opinion that closeted actors are being stupid. We can be out now. It’s fine! The lesbian actor r99 spoke of who is only in indie movies thinks that means she must be closeted? That’s just not true. She has something to work through personally or her agent is giving her irresponsible advice. Even if being out were to hurt her career, it’s not worth it to live a lie. And she is hurting young gay actresses who would love to have an out gay actress to look up to.

That said, I was once told that it was a problem that I “looked gay” when entering and leaving rooms in scenes I was in. Crazy. Go ahead, laugh, lol.

Yes, r115!! “Endless rehearsals” are the worst! Best thing about TV acting is the speed of the process.

How your headshot is stapled is not important, r122. “Wow, that actress just nailed the part. Acted from the heart and nailed the comedy. But wait, she stapled her headshot wrong.”

The fun part of this thread is that it started out as question about what it is like to date an actor but then turned into a thread of actors talking about themselves, lol!

Everyone who gets into Juilliard is not handed a career on a platter. You just haven’t heard of the ones who didn’t make it.

R187 Luke Evans?

R214, congratulations on your success (truly): good on you.

Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah me me me me me me. Me me me me me blah blah blah. Blah blah blah blah me me me me blah.

*forced theatrical laugh*

Me me me me me me me. Blah blah blah blah me?

[quote]How your headshot is stapled is not important, [R122]. “Wow, that actress just nailed the part. Acted from the heart and nailed the comedy. But wait, she stapled her headshot wrong.”

Maybe not at your level, but there have been many a casting agent dealing with newcomers (who don't have your experience) who have waxed endlessly about minor things such as that. If you can get your foot in the door, and you're good, it won't matter but if you're standing in the hallway trying to get inside, that or things like knowing what you should wear to an audition or knowing how to work with a reader properly either in person or in a taped audition are important.

r214, not many, it's true, but he is one of the few. There's not a person on this board who has not watched his show. There's not a person in any traffic jam you've ever been stuck in who has not watched his show. There's been a thread or two on him here, but they never picked up steam.

And I'm not telling you who the desert psycho is, even if you guess correctly, which no one has. Not in this context.

r219- we here at DL are a tiny tiny tiny percentage of the population. And there is no show that everyone watches. I mostly only watch America's Got Talent and NBA basketball games. Was he one of those?

r218- I still don't buy it. Staples don't make a difference. When I went to L.A thirteen years ago, I didn't even make a headshot/resume. My manager threw something together and went right to the casting offices on foot to convince them to see me. He got me auditions. I did them. Booked the role. When we were shooting the pilot, I mentioned to the showrunner that I sang and he was shocked. He had no idea I sang even though my resume is full of musical theater credits. Point is, he didn't even look at my resume. I know what you're saying, I do hear you, but everyone gets into the room eventually. It's what you do when you get there that matters. And I've never been told the right way to deal with a reader either. You just walk into the room, sit down, and play the scene. My advice to newcomers would be to train (not just at college) and become a REALLY GOOD ACTOR and LOVE every second of it. That's what matters. Not getting your SAG card (I didn't have one when I booked the pilot), not how you staple, not even how you dress or do make up. I once worked on a TV show and an actress (who ultimately became a star) went up to the make up person and asked for advice about make up for auditions. You know what the make up guy said? He said "It doesn't matter. We can make anyone look good. What they care about is if you are believable when you talk." If you don't master that, your staples and reader etiquette won't matter. Another case in point, Jim Borstelmann at one point was in a Broadway show at some point in every season for 13 years and never had a picture or resume. I wasn't shocked when he told me.

r216- Thank you.

r220 is me

r220 you see, of course, that the difference between you and r218 is that you went to LA *with* a manager.

Believe whatever the fuck you want to believe. There's not a person in any line you're going to stand in this week who wouldn't recognize him. Not going to get any more specific than that.

sent you an email R207, that's what I did! And posted a few times without signing.

You mean dimple guy??

[quote]When I went to L.A thirteen years ago, I didn't even make a headshot/resume.

Thirteen years ago. That post was also pointing out how quickly things change. You're not just starting.

(For the record, neither am. I haven't actually needed my headshot in a few years. However, occasionally I deal with younger people so I have my finger on that particular pulse.)

[quote]My manager threw something together and went right to the casting offices on foot to convince them to see me. He got me auditions. I did them. Booked the role.

You already had a manager. You do realize that was about actors coming out of school who can't snap their fingers and automatically have an agent and/or a manager which would be most actors.

And your manager walked to casting offices on foot to convince them to see you? Then you most have known a hell of a person. My first manager would have been too busy to do that and yes she's someone you would have heard of.

(I'll add, most things are digital now and you probably would only need a physical headshot if you were specifically asked to bring one and even then you should have one with you at all times.)

[quote]I know what you're saying, I do hear you,

I'm not sure you do.

[quote]but everyone gets into the room eventually. It's what you do when you get there that matters. And I've never been told the right way to deal with a reader either. You just walk into the room, sit down, and play the scene. My advice to newcomers would be to train (not just at college) and become a REALLY GOOD ACTOR and LOVE every second of it.

You're repeating what's in that original post while also mentioning your luck.

Not everyone is you and I'm happy that you've done well but the vast majority of actors don't have all of these magical things happen for them and that's what I'm not sure you're hearing because you've never had to think about those things.

[quote]That's what matters. Not getting your SAG card (I didn't have one when I booked the pilot), not how you staple, not even how you dress or do make up.

There are plenty of actors who don't have SAG-AFTRA cards and most of them, if their market is primarily non-union work, probably should think twice about getting one until they're ready but that's another topic. I'm also going to pretend FiCore doesn't exist however because I have feelings about that but that's neither here nor there.

It took me, 3 years to land an agent and a manager with some help from an actor I knew. It took me about 10 years before people randomly started calling my name out on the street. (Nobody [bold]here[/bold] knows who I am so there's no gossip there.)

Your experience is unique. Just because you didn't need to know those things doesn't mean no one does and that is where this disconnect is coming from.

R225 Excellent comment. Educational & informative.

Judging from the excessive number of posts in this thread and the engaging in secretive, coded private conversations in a PUBLIC forum, I’d say r1 et al is actually the one with obsessive issues and his supposedly psycho actor boyfriend dodged a billet but is still probably hearing from his stalking ex, r1.

Bullet*

Hi, psycho desert actor @ R227 !

The actors posting here are proving the non actors right. Even if backed by good intentions, they’ve written paragraphs and paragraphs and paragraphs about ... themselves.

Sorry, r229. I live in the tropics. Never even been to the desert.

I'm fascinated by r227(great sitcom, by the way!)'s assertion that we're talking in code. Cuz wowza does that sound just like the Desert Psycho's paranoid mis-interpretations of completely benign phrases.

And since you care (!), nope, never even responded to the nutty texts he sent me after I had to be rescued. Zero contact. Although, I did get a good chuckle out of his non sequiturial insertion of the phrase "--But I'm not crazy!! --" in the midst of a block of text half-heartedly chastising himself for things he didn't do at all, while ignoring entirely everything he did do.

[quote]So no one's come in to derail the thread.

Except for those, including r214 who at least admitted it, who’ve mistaken “what is it like dating an actor?” for “please tell us about yourself and your acting career, in extensive detail, with highlighted emphasis on your limited success.”

R1, please stop with your obsession, you’re just proving my point. What is this, your 25th post about this guy? And you actually felt the need to elaborate about your post break-up status with him?

r234, cute game. How're the termites in the tropics?

They’re doing better than you because they only had to deal with two hurricanes. Judging from your narrative, you had to deal with a force equal to 25 hurricanes. Cheers. Back to the topic.

You're really creepy.

R1, this is R43 who almost guessed who psycho desert was, but didn't. I'm also the one who outed R227 - who may or may not be psycho desert, but clearly has the same issues so it makes no difference.

I believe you and I (R1 and myself) have been unfortunate enough to get intimate with similar psycho types. The only reward is that you recognise them a mile away! Stay safe, R1. I'm a lesbian btw. (Euro lesbian to the other lesbian)

On another note, I believe we can all agree that Sir Colin Davis is the coolest when it comes to Berlioz.

r238, I'm 99% sure it's not him; the desert psycho is a willful luddite. But, yeah, same unpinned grenade rattling around in his head as r227. I tried dating "nice guys" and they bored me to death. How did you change what kind of woman turns you on? How do you change something that's subliminal, basically?

That's a very good question R240. In my case it was a case of life and death. I was going to die of depression, I had no will to live and there were times when I wanted to kill myself everyday, literally everyday. It was exhausting. Basically I had to get real. No matter what I might have going for me (and I do, it doesn't change anything), I needed to realise what my needs were, who I needed in order not to kill myself or self-destruct. I searched and searched, spent a summer doing date after date. Like dinner with one, drinks with another, etc. In just a few weeks I met over a dozen women and flirted with a few of them. One I had a brief fling with (she was a wonderful kisser) but it was never going to work. We were polar opposites, politically if anything. I also met another girl at the same time, the "serious" type, who I found very attractive. With her it worked. We fought a lot in the beginning, like we were fighting for our lives. It was all very real. Not about the sex, about the relationship. The sex was good. The passion was in making the relationship work. Fast-forward 10 years, there's been ups and downs, we've been through a lot. Our life is what we want it now. We've been together 10 years.

And this is the tricky bit... Two years ago I came across another woman. Not really understanding what was happening I fell head over heels in lust with her. By the time I realised it was too late, I don't think I could have fought it anyway. After a few months it dawned on me she was the spitting image of my own psycho desert ex. Same flaws, too (and those are not small flaws, either!) It annoys me but there's nothing much I can do about it. Luckily she's far, far away from my realm. Glad to keep it that way.

I've thought about it a lot. Why am I so attracted to this woman, who I know would be bad for me if we ever got together? She is exactly what I didn't choose. I am exactly what she didn't choose. Her core values are polar opposites of mine, the attraction I believe is in "opposites attract". There's an irresistible attraction in someone who is the exact opposite of who you are, with some similarities (we're both lesbians?)

Whereas with my partner, we share the same values. We agree on what we want to do with our lives, and why. I trust her. It's all about trust. Yes, we know each other too well, sometimes. That's also very comforting. And yes, the day-to-day of busy lives can be grinding. But we're not expecting rainbows or anything. We want our lives, on our terms. Don't know if this can help R1. But we take each other as we are, and we try to be better than we can. I won't lie, the amazing sex now is with the other one (10 years is a long time, especially if you factor in the legendary lesbian bed death), but it's all imaginary.

Shit, that was a long post. I'll try another version. It's about yourself. It's about instead of dark, dangerous, edgy, you go for honest, trustful and someone who cares about you. Really cares. I don't know if you saw the final season of Six Feet Under. That's the type of guy Claire chooses in the end. She's right. She's an artist, she needs someone who will be there for her.

I might be wrong, but I suspect R1 that you have an artistic vibe in you that's not fully realised - and therefore you believe you're not good enough, or you believe you need to be with an edgy, artist type to be interesting - you're the interesting one. Perhaps it's true that one needs to hit rock bottom to realise what their priorities are. I don't wish that on anyone. But if you need that to realise that "nice guys" are your best bet - well... Not all nice guys are dreadfully boring.

r241, do you find your partner interesting?

It's so text book cliché, but these crazy ones always wind up reminding me of my father. He was frequently terrifying and paranoid. But, with one big exception, none of them start off seeming like lunatics at all. And the scariest ones have actually been in tech related fields, not the arts. The nicest, nicest, sweetest, take him home to meet your family types have all worked in one very specific nook of visual arts. I dated a series of them and just wanted to throw myself out a window from boredom.

I was an artist on both coasts, for about 20 years. I've known desert psycho for about 15 years and the other actors I mentioned for a bit longer. I started in one medium, shifted to another and then another. Health crisis: I had to get more left-brained to deal with that and that led to new, much more analytical interests that have become another temporary career. I have trouble sustaining interest, in general, across the board. Kind of a professional dilettante. But I like it. I like to learn new things. And then forget about them, lol. But it would be nice to want to fuck someone on a semi-regular basis who doesn't turn out to be completely unhinged.

On Topic: If you're dating an actor, give them lots of compliments. They face relentless professional rejection and have astral body sized egos that need regular re-inflating. I'm not even saying that as a dig.

R241 here. I recognise quite a few of my traits in your professional dilettante description. Let's just say work is not the primary focus of my life. Anyway. The key is not to be looking for someone to fuck, but someone to build a life with. If you're not looking for that, you will continue to fuck types who are very exciting and who will become problematic once things get real. If you only want to fuck, you have to keep it short and sweet.

How old are you? I'm in my forties. My sexual prime is behind me (I was fit, not any longer though I'm not yet in overweight territory - I still get hit on a lot, but I know I won't deliver as I get tired a lot more easily than before).

To answer your question about my partner being interesting in my eyes, that's not how I frame the question (if you're looking for something short, there's your answer). She's my companion. I know she will follow me in my "adventures". Sometimes she'll be the one with an adventure, but usually it's me. What I was looking for, and I knew this, was care, nurturing, and loyalty. She's got those to a fault. I needed those too badly, the rest didn't matter. I know I'm interesting enough for two, and she's not a blank page either. She's just more reserved, more safe. But she does things. She's part of several community projects while my only part-time activities are rather personal stuff. As for "interesting" people that I've met over the years, they were always more unreliable, a bit cruel, and you never really knew if they cared or not. That's how I made my decision.

O.K., it's ME, bitches. Now...WHERE'S MY CRÈME BRÛLÉE?!

Euro lesbian, do tell us about some of the big names you've worked with.

r245 It's past the main course. My tummy is craving. I don't understand why I have to have this craving. All I has to do is hold out until dessert, and IT'S PAST THE MAIN COURSE! My tummy is craving, can't you understand that?! GIVE MY TUMMY THE CRÈME BRÛLÉE!

I dated an actor a few years ago and aside from the fact he was nearly always broke it was fine. Granted we're in Canada and Canada doesn't have a star system like in Hollywood so actors here, even when they are working, can go out and lead a fairly normal life and not have to worry about intrusion into their private lives. At one point while we were together he did talk about moving to LA and he knew that if he became successful there he would likely be forced back into the closet.

To Euro lesbian,

It's me! Thanks for posting again! I just opened my special DL email address--I don't usually keep it open because nobody writes me--and saw it! I'm still working, but I will write to you late tonight when I'm home.

Good to hear from you again!

R1 is an unhinged, bitchtastic, cuntburger. Thx for making us laugh. Jesus Christ.

Oh and to all the Brit and Euro actors on here who are yammering on about actors they know who are famous or semi-famous, or ”you’d know him if you saw him” types. They call that an “oh him”. Also, nobody gives a shit about European actors unless your last name is Skaarsgard. So for fuck sake, shut up. But you can’t or you wouldn’t be an actor would you?

R251 STFU. This thread is open to anyone to talk about actors.

To talk about DATING actors, r252. If you’re an actor wanting to talk about yourself - or trying to start a strictly two-way conversation with some European Girl you’re developing a crush on - start your own thread.

Really.

R253 Dating actors means you can BE an actor and talk about that you fascist d-bag.

253 is a troll. Ignore it.

Some angry actors on this thread. Hope they get a job soon.

They need to be the center of attention, always. Be it a family event, just a gathering of friends, or an industry party, if they begin to feel you are getting, even in their own imagination, more attention than they are, they usually become sullen and difficult, and christfuck they will make you pay for it later.

Enjoy their performances on film, television, or the stage, but for God's sake, keep away from them otherwise.

Wow...ex-chorus boys can be so bitter...

[quote] Yes, [R115]!! “Endless rehearsals” are the worst! Best thing about TV acting is the speed of the process.

By far the worst acting can be found on network TV. And those actors learn the worst acting tics - the lack of time to properly digest the material means they rely on TELEGRAPHING. Add the fact that network TV directors change every episode and have no time or skill to direct actors... it's just horrid overall.

I think OP was interested on what it’s like to date an actor from the point of view of the person dating the actor NOT FROM THE POUNT OF VIEW OF THE ACTOR. But hey, it’s always about yourselves isn’t it, r254?

R257, what an excellent description of any interaction I've had with actors and narcissists-at-large.

This thread gives you an interactive experience of what it's like to come across the worst in any actor. The best is reserved for other threads, or simply their work on stage if they can make it.

Their are very few good aspects of dating an actor or actress.

I dated a beautiful girl who was a working actor in LA, but thought she was fat (she wasn’t) and felt intimidated by men she worked with. Was too afraid to take the steps/risks she needed to really continue acting. (Like get new headshots before she lost weight). Sat at home reading self help books. Was unemployed a lot and it caused resentment. But I miss her, she was the best person I’ve been with.

Really? Sorry to hear she was so unwell. Hope she finds acceptance from herself, she's probably much "better" than she thinks she is. (What is a good person anyway?)

If this is any help, I have a friend who is a visual artist and she is more often than not crippled by self-doubt. She finds it hard to communicate with others (although, really, she's quite fine at communicating once she goes for it) and is very pretty (Grace Kelly meets Jean Seberg, that's her face and sort of her style).

So what ended up happening to her? Did she eventually quit the biz?

I never dated an actor, but for a while I did have friends who were big into improv--until I got really tired of them: big druggies.

I dated a stand-up comedian (no one famous) and he was NUTS

I dated a gorgeous Ivy League and Julliard grad who had a bit of money but not much and was acting around NY. Also he had a fabulous cock and great skin. He was push and pull. They all have "pulling" skills, they suck your attention in and have many ways to seduce you. When they feel your desire and adolation, they push you away so that the cycle can repeat, since they want people actively giviing them energy but they are saving their own energy to radiate in performances, not relationships.

Juilliard

^^Me with the Improv ex-friends. (From that famous troupe, in that windy city.)

You know what it is, too, there is a Peter Pan thing with some of these people which is cute until they hit about 35. That plus the druggie-ness plus the fact that they aren't really funny, but have the "funny" schtick on full blast all the fucking time--enough already.

I dated one of those actors who always get small parts but nonetheless keep working, and making a living. Like most actors I've run into who are constantly on the cusp of making it, but never do, he was basically a drunk. Before dinner he'd have two cocktails, a bottle of wine with dinner, and then he'd sneak a few whiskies afterward. By 11:00 he was a mess, bemoaning his fate, that no one realized he could have been a star... and yes, I stayed with him for two years because he was damn attractive. Eventually, he wasn't.

Same old story. Don't date an actor.

Different character every day of the week. Never know who you'll wake up next to.

My friend used to be on Knots Landing for almost a decade. Then a couple of TV movies, a few of feature films and then boom ... nothing good or high profile for years until a miraculous comeback. It's a strange profession. She used to be very stressed out when she thought her career was over.

It's about what you project re: zeitgeist. You are the zeitgeist, you play the lead. You are the opposite of the zeitgeist, play an antagonist. If you're not on the spectrum of the issues of the day, there's no reason to cast you in the project.

"What is it like dating an actor?"

Tricky. They're very cagey about their ages.

[quote]r265 What is a good person anyway?

I would say a good person is someone who often takes a universal view, or thinks of others and takes action to help them. We're all selfcentered and focused on survival a good deal of the time, but to not make life COMPLETELY about one's self (or only help people who can help you) is exceptional.

As humanity slips lower and lower (and how can we really be doing well, with Trump and Kavanaugh being taken seriously)...I guess just being fair and not actively HURTING others makes you "good," too, by default.

R278 Survival? Wtf are you running from lions in the jungle, dumbfuck.

Did anyone say “actor?”

R257 and r262 and r272 speak truth.

And r264 she doesn’t sound like a good person, she sounded like a needy mess.

Who have ever dated Richard Cox, actor of Broadway and the movie "Cruising", he played the Columbia student killer?... as many actors of the 70's and 80's are mentioned upthread.......

(R282) Is he completely unknown ? even in his own country (usa) ???????

R275 dish on William Devane?

Dating an Actor is like dating a child you can legally fuck.

Omg. N a m b l a is not cool. Get out!

I’ve been following this thread and debating whether or not to speak of my own experiences, but what the hell, it might serve as a warning to some of you. Like many in a similar situation, my actor partner, ‘M’, has a few issues. (Technically we’re on a break, but we’ve rekindled before and I hope we will again.)

He’s emotional, overly sensitive, somewhat insecure, occasionally selfish and sometimes pretty bad tempered. He was also a victim of abuse as an adolescent which must have contributed to his behaviour but I also think the aforementioned personality traits are an inherent part of his make-up. I’m sympathetic to his needs and history but he can be bloody hard work.

I had no idea who he was when we met (at a London museum’s after-hours exhibition) as he was pretty small fry back then. We’re both British with French ancestry and have a mutual love of art, design and architecture – although our preferences differ which we argued about on the night we met. It was through this heated discussion about art that he admitted he is an actor; the idea of dating someone with an irregular income wasn’t exactly attractive, if I’m honest, but HE was attractive, and funny, a good listener and sweet-natured. He asked me out, I said yes, and we’ve been on and off ever since.

It wasn’t until we started to get serious that the cracks started to show. He wouldn’t introduce me to his friends and had no interest in meeting mine. Whenever I brought up the topic of him meeting my parents he’d always find a reason why we he couldn’t. When I confronted him about it he fired up and blamed me for causing him stress which caused him to mess up at his last two auditions. I told him that if he wasn’t going to take us seriously, then I failed to see the point in continuing. He walked out.

When he came back he agreed that we should meet each other’s friends. That was a bad idea. I thought his friends were ill-informed numpties who spent the whole night discussing a load of nonsense like it was the most important stuff in the world. He hated my friends, too, as he thought they were all boring. While his friends all work in either the media or the creative industries, my friends don’t, and what he doesn’t understand (like my friends’ education, law and HR backgrounds) he has no interest in.

Despite these setbacks our relationship still progressed – when it’s just the two of us we work really well. I’m a caring type and I know he can be vulnerable so taking care of him, cooking for him and supporting him, makes us both happy. He admitted he was closeted early on, which I accepted, but he had been told to remain that way by his NY agent. His London agent said it was up to him how he proceeded. Bearing in mind his lofty ambitions I wasn’t surprised he took his American agent’s advice. I told myself it wouldn’t be forever.

What I can’t tolerate is the fake girlfriend deal. She is a lovely actress (and really quite beautiful) who worked with him on an NBC series, but the coupling-up for publicity purposes left me fuming. The pictures of them kissing and groping in public on the promo tour turned my stomach, but by this point I was in love with him and I’ve tried to put up with it. He doesn’t understand my anger at all and thinks I’m being unreasonable. This bust-up has simmered constantly and has never been resolved. He actually calls her up for an event so they can be seen together; she agrees to it because she likes him, they have a lot in common, she doesn’t want to date at the moment (bad break-up!) and appreciates the publicity, however minor.

I think that’s enough. What started out as quite cathartic is now, quite frankly, depressing.

Blind Item Team Activate!

R287, good post. Thank you for sharing your experience.

R287 "I told myself it wouldn’t be forever". It's going to be forever. I'm sorry.

Holy Shit, R287. I hope writing all that out has given you perspective on how miserable this situation is making you.

R287 - Yes, good post. I really hope you're not a troll. If you are, however, you are a man good one.

Damn. Not man.

!

R287 does that mean that he spends a great deal of time away doing TV shows or was that a one- time deal?

I should have specified AMERICAN or OUT OF TOWN TV Shows.

Some of them get their acts together as they age, but the ones in their early 20s are usually needy show-offy nightmares.

I'm sorry R287, it sounds like you do love each other, but succeeding as an actor (and thus the bearding) is his no. 1 priority. He might shape up when/if his career is established at a level where's he's not the leading/romantic interest, or if he decides to focus on stage.

R286, Nothing NAMBLA about my post. I meant Actors are Children in their mindset. Have some tea and feed your cats.

Any guesses as to the actor at r287?

You shouldn't have specified NBC show. It gave your trolling game away. Fun post, otherwise.

Is the British actor who treated his chick like shit, Tom Hiddleston? I remember someone who lived near him posting that Hiddleston and his gf were at a local bar and Tom spent most of the night pretending she didn’t exist before walking out alone and stiffing her with the bill! Apparently, the gf walked back to his house and let herself inside. Very odd.

^ Sounds like either a weirdo closet case or a guy who hates women

Tom Hiddleston screams 'self-loathing closet case' to me. Probably has something to do with his father, a butch Scottish biochemist, who disapproves of the whole acting thing (and the whole cocksucking thing). He told Tom that he thought an Eton and Cambridge education should have prepared his son for something better than being an actor. God only knows what he thought of Tom being 'mentored' by Kenneth Branagh.

THANK YOU R R287 FOR POSTING

Your post took a lot of courage, r287. Much appreciated.

R287 Yes. Thanks for sharing. Pay no mind to these cunts on here who try to dictate what can be posted. This is an anonymous forum, stupid fucks.

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

The woman in R307's photographs is beautiful.

Shirley, there's more.

Don't call me Shirley.

How soon before Hiddleston wears an "I Heart Mystery Woman" shirt?

Tom Hiddleston and Luke Evans are candidates for the douchey, British closet case.

But Andrew Garfield, Kit Harrington and Taron Egerton might be him.

Wasn't the douche Brit hetero?

Isn't Luke Evans out? R312

Yes, he is

Make sure they are talented. It's hard even if they are but if they are deluded and can't even get to first base in the business, it is a nightmare and no fun.

I used to get shit about it but I used to say I wouldn't date an actor unless he had a really good agent. Otherwise, it's a hamster spinning in a wheel for years and years,

Who have had "experiences" with a CLOSETED Celebrity (or semi-celebrity) ?

R25, if you're gonna post, just go ahead and post the name too.

We're not interested in your peek-a-boo posts.

I dated the hottest porn boys in the world

very spoiled by who cares

theyr fun to run round with

trophys

What R25 said is very similar to what Riz Ahmed did with his ex girlfriend who was in sex parties....anyway.