I stole a pair of my hot upstairs neighbour's filthy underwear...

There is a word for your kind: Thief.

OP is a panti-dorobo.

Masturbate with it and then put it back in their next clean load.

WHERE IS THE IMPORTANT INFO? How does it smell? Any exciting stains? What kind of briefs? Did you jerk off yet?

Sheesh - you did a pervy thing now enjoy it.

Dump a few wads in them, OP, let them dry until crusty, then one day when you see the guy alone, return them to him with the excuse you found them in the laundry room and you think they might be his.

I'm sure there's a Benny Hill sketch about this.

Keep them. Take a picture and put on Instagram Nd then ask him to check out your IG.

Might as well go full on crazy...

He won’t miss them. He will not even notice they’re gone. Do what you want with them and throw them out.

Are they stained, OP?

Wear them over your head and sniff to your hearts delight

This really happened.

nice work!

I really don’t get this underwear-sniffing fetish. I’m glad if it works for you but it does nothing for me. Oh and you stole something that doesn’t belong to you - not cool

Did he steal something that doesn't belong to him?! Why the nerve. One should only steal one's own stuff.

more details please

Sounds too easy. I think you've been overly pervy and this was a trap. You were being filmed by the ghoulish girlfriend.

I love the smell of a dirty jockstrap in the morning.

Perfect

Does your apartment have security cameras??

You found his underwear in the cellar?

Oh you did something pervy, get over, enjoy them and if you find the opportunity to do something nice for him then you can feel like you paid him back. Just don't make it a habit, think you are feeling bad now, imagine if you have been caught taking them.

well. DESCRIBE THE STAINS please

OP if you really want to be extra pervy, wear them, then wash them, put them in a zip lock bag and hang them up in the laundry room with a note, found in my laundry but they aren't mine.

Then every time you see him you can wonder if he is wearing the underwear you wore.

Ooohhh r24 expert level funny perv.

[quote] Does your apartment have security cameras??

Obviously you have never lived in an apartment building with a laundry room. Stuff goes missing all the time. Socks, t-shirts, underwear. People drop things or they get overlooked in the dryer. The thought of someone going to the super and asking them to go through security footage to find a missing pair of underwear is laughable.

R8 is right, he'll never notice they're missing. Who the fuck counts their underwear?

R26 I wrote the security camera thing as a joke. As if anyone is trawling video footage to see who pinched a pair of whats probably an 8 year old pair of skidded up Calvins.

A common laundry room? You must be poor.

Okay, no description of the smell. Very good. Hemingway you ain’t.

He steals undies from a really hot guy and you don’t describe them smell? How fucking awful are you!!

[quote] I wrote the security camera thing as a joke. As if anyone is trawling video footage to see who pinched a pair of whats probably an 8 year old pair of skidded up Calvins.

Oh, sorry R27. I made the mistake of posting during Rachel Maddow. My sense of humor must've been temporarily buried under all the outrage about the latest atrocities from the Orange Shitgibbon

[quote][R8] is right, he'll never notice they're missing. Who the fuck counts their underwear?

I have my favourite underwear and socks. I might not notice right away but eventually I'll realize their missing.

Good job, OP. If you don't know what to do with them, you can send them to me.

I'll happily wear them like an oxygen mask during a 6 hour bate session. I'll wear them to the gym, then send them back to you.

I can see why you were momentarily blinded by rage r31. The orange shitgibbon will do that to normal people.

Well, duh, OP. Of course you return them to him, when he's alone, saying that you found them in the laundry room, and their aroma reminded you of him. Make a point of caressing them as you stand there. Tell him that you really like their design and were tempted to,try them on, but that you wanted his permission first. Put some glycerine sweat on your neck and give it a swipe with the shorts, as you comment on what a hot day it is.

If he's straight he probably wont even notice. He is DL he will def notice.

Picture this! 1984! A shitty old house in a shitty midwestern suburb!

My brothers rent "Porky's". Much to my dismay, it is NOT a modern retelling of the classic "Porgy and Bess". There are lots of jiggling floppy breastesses. Meh. But, there's a scene where a a a a woman is huffing filthy jock straps. My brothers are laughing their asses off. Oh, the hilarity!

It was the hottest scene for me.

OP, I was raised strict German Lutheran so I can't condone your theft. We usually demonize, torture, and kill people before we take their stuff. We call it 'cleaning up'.

^^^^Sophia?

Well. OP..

What did you do with them?