Hey how's it going

dude, you need to discover paragraphs

Worst punctuation ever.

I can smell your cunt OP

0/10

Why the fuck do morons have to say, "never married, no kids" That is pretty much a given these days. Jeesass Christ.

My name is Luka, I live on the second floor. I live upstairs from you, yes I think I've seen you before.

Is this a parody post, or does OP really not know about punctuation at all?

It is probably some scammer from Ghana who copied a pasted someones profile from a dating site. They aren't smart enough to realize this isn't a dating site and there is no way for us to contact each other.

This is s BILL TAYLOR type parody post.

OP is a Nigerian prince who needs to allocate 1 million dollars.

Ten for Carl:

. . . . . . . . . .

Carl, I regret to inform you that you lost (at least) 80% of DL with "I don't like cats at all lol."

Carl honey, you left out some crucial inchformation.

TL;DR

Hey dude give me a hit if your serious an I will give my numer you sound just like what I am looking four just post me here and let me know if your real $eriously dude

Who are the dim wits who think DL is a place to post personals?

Carl seems to be dumber than a box of rocks.

Well ! Smell our lady of high standards at R13 ! "Inchformation" . Hilarious!

What happened to "dumber than a box of hair"?

He sounds sincere. Just surprised he's almost 31 and has never bottomed.

He actually sounds like a lot of fun.

He doesn't belong here.

Carl just gave me — absolutely free — the Mrs. Fields Cookie Recipe!

Hey pilipino man who wants a video call I'm a gay!!! I'll call you who wants

Tooken?

Well, you've got my motor humming, Carl!

One thing that never seems to fail on DL is, although we never get to know if an OP is genuine or an EST, we see plenty of evidence that many DL responders are bona fide assholes.

(Note to Carl:

Dear sir,

As noted upthread, DL is not a dating site. However, if it were, I assure you that you’d be better off casting yourself into a grease fire than wasting one second pursuing the humorless, pompous schmucks that have largely succeeded In taking over, and cheapening what once was a delightfully amusing gay forum..

I assume you are aware that many baubles, though they glisten and sparkle, on close inspection reveal themselves to merely be trinkets, fashioned from brittle plastics, prettified cheap metals and artfully colored worthless pastes. Never reduce yourself to buying junk jewelry; it has no value!

Very truly yours,

Beenthere Donethat

You lost me at my name is Carl.

I'll have what she's having!

Sorry, I don't date windbags.

Ha. Very good, OP. I like the bit about having never bottomed before but you're "open to it".

Shaved down there, does not like cats. I hate you already

4/10

2 for getting at least 30 responses. 2 for garnering serious responses like R30.

R2, he admitted being from Georgia, 'nuff said.

Carl! Ah am breathless just reading your post! How you do run on!

Seriously, you must be more conscientious about formatting.

Carl would be good for BILL TAYLOR, since BILL always has an extra comma every sentence or two,,.

[quote]February 17th Zodiac As an Aquarius born on February 17th, your personality is characterized by a romanticism, impulsiveness, and charm. A romantic at heart, above all, you enjoy giving and receiving love. As a result of this quality, you have had many close relationships, but your impulsiveness makes it easy for you to fall in and out of love. Socially, you display the same warmth and passion. Your innate charm and mystery has earned you many admirers. You would be surprised to know that even your closest friends still find you a bit mysterious.

You sexy Aquarius, you! You're even shorter than me: I like shorties!

The grammar queens will need the smelling salts when they spot this post.

He’ll find an eldergay who will take him hoping for love in and in six months the eldergay’s family will put out a silver alert because he’s gone missing.

Translation:

Desperately Seeking

Sounds like a craigslist ad, or a parody of one

I’m gonna buy the “Tooken” trilogy LOL

Carl doesn't exist. And that opening post was far too lengthy to be taken seriously, or for anyone to read in its entirety.

But on the off chance that Carl does exist... Hey, Carl. Let your pubes grow back then let's drop some acid and I'll teach you how to bottom.

Carl might not be real. He might be a disabled dom looking for a submissive or he might be a 25 year old who was dating a much older man. I don't think he's John or the person who judges others based on whether they have a passport or someone whose aunt enjoys community theatre. Maybe.

And where are you currently incarcerated, Carl?

Marry me

, ? . - - - , - - - , . . . . , . , . , , , , , , , . , , , . , . . , . . . , , , . . , . . , . , , , , , , . , , , . , . , - - - . . : , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . , . . .

There. A taste of all the punctuation missing from the OP. I undoubtedly missed a few, because all the commas and periods start to blur together after awhile.