Is this Simon Cowell's New and Improved Health Regime?

She is one hot mess!

[quote] Health Regime

Oh, dear.

He's British. Cigarettes and alcohol are non-negotiable.

I look at someone like him and laugh at how pathetic he is. He's reached the lofty heights of celebritydom yet he still does not have the smarts to look at himself in the mirror and see that he is nothing but a caricature of what many people think a Hollywood celebrity is. He actually must think this smarmy open shit/hairy chest look he's had for many years is impressive. I get the feeling he either has quite low self esteem and thinks dressing himself so laughably looks hot, or he has never learned that the days of anything near that look were over 30 years ago. Oh well, the British always has been very slow in catching up on the current styles.

He looks like crap . Needs to stop with the Tom Jones shirts. You aren’t 25 and an InstaHo, girl.

Miget looks like he smells.

R2 If it's good enough for the proofreaders at The Guardian, it's good enough for DL.

Save the dears for actual emergencies lest they lose their punch.

He looks like a monkey.

All that money and he can’t buy trousers that fit? They look like Hostess Pants. And why is his face so puffy? He’s so totally gross.

He believes that they make him look taller, R9.

Is Simon a homosexual?

R2 does not know British English but presumes to judge, therefore her "Oh, dear" deserves an

Oh, dear.

SHE HAS A DEATH WISH

And tragically his helpful acquaintance Max Clifford, sleaze bag extraordinaire, is no longer with us to place laughable upbeat tabloid stories about SC's youthful exploits.

What is the deal with the baggy pants and pointed shoes?

That plastic surgery is containing the face in.

Messy bms

All that baggy clothing, he's starting to look American.

R2 - Are you a Yank?

Simon Cowell dreams of being Tom Jones.

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A good bra would solve all his sag.

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Some helpful guidance for Simon as he reaches for the vodka bottle.

Hot milk--is that explanation from a publicist or Daily Mail bitchery?

Publicist. Cowell's face looks like a helium balloon.