Hickory Farms Insider

Tell us about your co-workers!

Oh, hon

What are the anchor stores in this mall?

Is it true that hickory is related to chicory?

Are the farmers hawt?

Have you ever chucked an artisanal jam jar at the head of a kiosk vendor?

Well every year they hire these single moms on welfare so that they get these federal wage subsidies. And they never last more than a week. My one co-worker told me that she doesn't like the one we got this year and so she did her own internet search. The girl/woman was arrested for heroin possession just a few months ago. She should be worth some entertainment value till they catch on if they do.

Is this the dirt mall where Priscilla Barnes squeezes her third nipple into big, big savings?

Do you get to keep the smock?

Great thread OP!

Questions:

Who buys the stuff? Where is Hickory Farm? Do you personally eat the sausages?

Our anchor stores are Macys, JC Penny and the Bon Ton.

Exactly how big-n-tasty is the salami in the "Taste of the Trade" basket?

-9,087,864/10

No one who lives in Flyverolandia ever, ever, ever, ever, ever refers to it as Flyoverlandia.

Sometimes a heroin addict can work two or three months at a job, before they relapse. Give her a chance.

Sometimes a little heroin can get you through the day. Give it a chance.

I've never thrown anything artisinal at another kiosk. Even using a liberal definition of the word I don't think you could call anything we sell artisinal.

Do you sell heroin-fused sausages?

Do you sell pumpkin-spiced delicacies?

I just made up the Flyoverlandia word. I know not very original. Trust me when I say that all the NYC and LA gays would consider this Flyoverland or whatever the term is.

I'm not sure about the Hickory Chickory thing. Isn't Chickory some made up word from an old coffee commercial?

Sausage party!

We don't sell pumpkin spice anything. I know. MARY! We really don't start selling anything until the week before Tgiving and I think by then most people are pumpkinned out.

Will you prepare any more samples? I don't want those; people have touched them. You're going to put on a bouffant and gloves, right? Yeah, this cheddar is so much cheaper at Aldi's. Where's the nearest Aldi's? Hey, Hey, Hey, I've got a deal on smartphones with the latest in 3G wireless technology! I'll wait for my samples out here in my kiosk. Maybe we could barter or something. Put on your bouffant and gloves and get slicing; I'll give you a gift card rebate for Tracphone!

Well, OP, at least you've got some money coming in. I know retail is a drag at Christmas, but do you find any joy or humor in your job?

Their cheese food products are inedible. I rather like the cranberry mustard to add to turkey sandwiches. I stock up this time of year to last the following year.

We don't get to keep the apron but a related story. A few years ago they had new aprons made up that said something like "Try Some of My Sausage!" No one wore them. They were replaced the next year.

Cool thread OP!

OP you seem like fun. I would come by your kiosk and buy something from you!

I've never met any of the farmers so I don't know whether or not they are hot. Their corporate headquarters are out of Ohio where they were founded by a farmer. About 20 years or so ago they went bankrupt and closed all their mall stores. They reopened a few years later after being purchased by some venture capital group out of Florida and switched to the seasonal kiosk model.

Well, OP, *I* happen to love the Hickory Farms honey & pineapple mustard. I order a year's supply of it (2 six packs) from the HF website as soon as they get it in stock every fall.

If you worked at the mall in my town, I would come by and see you and we could go get a slice of pizza at Sbarro.

Everybody laughs at Hickory Farms but if you set it out on a plate, people snatch it up.

Quite a few doctors have opiate addictions.Its not just temp Hickory Farnsworth employees.

Think about that the next time your usually impatient and smug doctor gives you that benign smile.

OP, do you have a moment to discuss the latest in eye surgery? In ten minutes I can correct your vision to 75/20 using the latest in layzicks technology! Using this engineered light scalpel that looks just like a laser pointer, I can restore your vision. You won't need bulky glasses and you will no longer have to hold your pill bottles at arms-length to tell what's inside them! All it takes is a small recurring charge on you visa/mastercard *no Discover, sorry* and you'll be cradling those pills to your breast in no time at all. Are those samples free? Hey, let's Desposito!

If you had to combine 3 HIckory Farms products for a snack, which ones would you choose?

How do you handle repeat customers who come back to your kiosk every 15 minutes mooching the free samples? Are you ever tempted to poke them in the eyes with the toothpicks?

Who buys the stuff? Mostly white people. This area is 95% white. All ages. For a lot of people various Hickory Farm products have been part of their holiday traditions for years.

How often do people deep throat your smoked meat?

Post some pictures of the mall and its inhabitants!

Does Hickory Farms still sell those Christmas gift boxes containing meats, cheeses and mustard.

Love this thread!

OP, what do you think is the worst-tasting item that they sell?

I actually do find a lot of joy and humour in the job. I've become really good friends with some of my co-workers. We all tend to be overqualified with the exception of the welfare moms. And of course I eat the sausage. It's damn good!!! I get a really generous discount and I might help myself to a sample or two. Even though you're on your feet all the time the job puts another ten to fifteen pounds on me.

OP, what's the most effective way of wrestling a mad lesbian SJW animal rights loon to the ground?

Will eating sausages aggravate my fibromyalgia?

I'm not even sure where to start with the questions and cimmenrs about the samples and the health code. I've got to take a deep breath first.

I'm a 55 year old eldergay prone to moobs. Are Hickory Farms meats loaded with hormones?

You seem cool until your bitchy comments about welfare moms and your co-worker who went and researched the one to give her a hard time sounds like a right twat. I mean, at least the chick is trying to work and stay clean.

What the hell are you talking about Willis upthread saying our cheeses are inedible? Present your case.

We really don't have any bad tasting items and I've eaten them all. Back in the day when we had the actual stores we sold some, by today's standards, bizarre or gross sounding items. None of that has carried over to today's hickory farms.

I like spicy meats. Does HF sell meats with some heat?

I do love the HF summer sausage.

Merry Christmas, OP!

We have a spicy version of our beef summer sausage with chili pepper black pepper and red pepper flakes.

Are there any products from the past that people ask for?

What's the best selling item? Which item do you recommend?

Tell me what mall you're at so I can come grope ya!

You cocksuckers crack me up.

Somebody in the "Let's Be a Mall in the '80s" thread mentioned hard candies that tasted like mixed drinks—are those still around?

Do they still sell any sweets? What kind? Do they have petit-fours?

Do you still sell that dry rye bread?

Did you meet any of the Santas?

My late father in law loved Hickory Farms. My husband still buys the gift sets.

The smaller-sized summer sausages that come in the gift boxes are great to store and take camping as they can be added to noodles and stews.

Items from the past that a good amount of people ask for are the really big cheese balls or cheese logs and the holiday blend coffee. I do know one of the Santa's and there are rumours about him. This is so cliche but he's been the Santa for a good number of years andctgey say he was fired one year for coming to work drink too many times.

Three products to combine for a snack? One 10 oz turkey summer sausage, one 10 oz block smoked Swiss cheddar blend and a sweet n sour apricot dipping sauce.

Sorry no rye bread.

I'm not as drink as you thunk I am.

I hope you don't allow the dope addict to have access to the till.

Why do they not make nutloaf?

Back in the 80's my favorite Hickory Farms product were the Rounds O' Rye crackers (I believe they came in flavors; Sour Cream n' Onion, etc.) Do those still exist?

R12, that's completely not true. Flyoverlandia is filled with people who are there for some particular reason other than they actually like it there. And they bitch about it all day long.

Big hug to you, OP. That was good advice above about your heroin addict and the cash drawer. If she has access to it, make a plan now to protect your ass when the money starts disappearing. Get that report your friend found. Print it out. Have it ready to serve on angry managers.

[quote]I do know one of the Santa's and there are rumours about him.

"Rumours," OP? Is that a flyoverlandia spelling? I think not. Busted.

Is the Men's room at the mall considered high traffic with all the horny lumberjack clad DILF's?

How do you secure the kiosk when you need to use the facilities?

Do you re-plasticize the summer sausage when you're done doing your dirty with it, or do you just wipe it off under your arm and put it back in the stack?

Are the woods surrounding the mall swarming with Bears?

Interesting question, R71. And why is Hickory Farms selling summer sausage during the autumn and winter? Seems suspect to me. I wouldn't touch it.

Is this a kiosk or a full store? My how the mighty have fallen.

I once fucked myself with a Hickory Farms summer sausage. Was the best sex I'd had that winter.

Those giant gift packages are a sucker's game, right? After the meats and mustards are gone, those little cheese samples get tossed by Valentine's Day. Sad!

Is there a loccitane or do you have the lower class bath n body werx?

R75 Did he at least take your call the next day?

Dobosh! I swear, Hickory Farms once had Dobosh Tortes good as Swiss Colony's. Then one day they was nada! Would you agree that Hickory Farms neglects pastries in general?

Which meat stick would be best for an anal virgin?

Asking for a friend.

^ Call me!

Do you still have the strawberry candies?

OP, do you fraternize with employees of other kiosks?

Lani O’Grady worked at a mall kiosk shortly before her untimely demise.

R68 is right:

Flyoverstan wouldn’t type ‘humour’ or ‘rumour’

What is the flyover country in the U.K.?

He could be Canadian.

There are definitely flyover areas in Canada (Hi, Manitoba!), and a quick search showed HF locations there.

Yup. Humour and Rumour would not be common in Oklahoma, but not at all uncommon in American states along the Canadian border. A friend in Michigan always spells the words that way. Colour. Seems too much to me, but that's how he learned it in Michigan.

My iphone always switches to UK spelling. No idea why. I hate that

R90 Pretty sure you can change that.

Have you had your eyebrows threaded yet? In our miserable mall, the eyebrow threaders are giving the cell phone kiosks a run for their money.

R90, you need to change your language preference on your iPhone to American English.

Do they sell cranberry mayo? I'd but that for turkey sandwiches, but not cranberry mustard.

I miss the olden days when my parents would bring home stuff people gave them for Xmas, or that they won at church Xmas fairs. Basket of cheer (from the church - can you tell we were Irish catholic?). Cheese and nuts and jams. Sausages and crackers. Homemade cookies. Someone always gave my mother Bailey's.My mom's German boss would make Linzer torte and Linzer cookies. So not-American because they weren't pure sugar. I loved them. One year, someone gave my parents a bottle of Harvey's Bristol Creme. I loved the box it came in and the name. I thought it must taste like some heavenly dessert, all creamy and vanilla-y. I begged my mother for a sip.

"It's sherry," she said.

Sherry sounded like it would taste good. Like cherry, Vanilla cherry cream!

Oh, Christ. I couldn't stop coughing. It was disgusting. I said, "No wonder Indians called that stuff firewater."

Oops. It's Harverys Bristol Cream, not Harvey's.

How is 'Processed Cheese Food' raised and what diet is it fed? Is it raised free-range and humanely, or squeezed into a tight box to live out its pathetic days?

OP Flyover mall peeps do not spell humour with a 'u'. Nice try smokey cheez.

R96 Its a concoction of food scientists, something like Velveeta, that can sit on shelves at room temperature for months or years without “spoiling.”

Do you still sell the individually wrapped strawberry candy pieces? They used to include a few in the gift packs.

Why IS it called summer sausage, btw?

Because it doesn't need refrigeration.

So is there such thing as winter sausage?

Are there any quality HF products that one should buy directly from HF? Or can we get the same or better quality elsewhere?

[quote]There are definitely flyover areas in Canada (Hi, Manitoba!), and a quick search showed HF locations there.

Hi yourself, bitch.

OP, why do you go back year after year to work there? Why not another holiday job in the mall? Just curious. Thanks!

R105, I'm not OP, but I can think of many reasons someone would return to the same job year after year:

- they're already familiar with the company and its products;

- they LIKE the company and its products (and therefore enjoys their time there, as well as getting use out of the corporate discount);

- and perhaps they enjoy the type of clientele that HF usually gets (vs other types of kiosks/stores).

Does that help?

Let me add something about my heroin addict welfare mom co-worker. Without going into too much detail no one could ever accuse me of not helping and being sympathetic to the downtrodden. However in this situation I find it ironic and funny. This is why. Every year the temp company outsourcing conglomerate that hires us (we technically don't work for Hickory Farms) tries to save money and have the government pay some of their employer wages through these programs. And every year the people they hire end up stealing from us and are not good workers. In the end they always end up costing more to the company. And I am being very nice and helpful to the heroin addict. She's still going to steal from us though.

Yes, thank you, r106! Of course that makes sense. I had not thought of it that way.

Regarding food safety issues with the sample tray, we get a lot of training in this area and are very conscientious about it. If a single person grabs a piece of cheese already stuck with a piece of cheese on it instead of us handing it to them we have to throw the entire tray into the trash. Also I'm not going to comment on the Aldi comment because this is a Hickory Farms thread not an Aldi thread.

I don't get mad at people who want to eat a lot of samples because the more they eat the more I can tell them about the products and the more they usually buy. Now the people who stick their bare hands into the sample tray. That's something else.

I was going to make a snarky comment about HF. Instead, I now find myself nostalgic for the sausage, the rye bread, the free cheese samples and those darn strawberry candies. Darn it, I miss that place! And those darn strawberry candies. And the crackers and mustard.

How could there be 111 replies and no reference to the Hickory Farms mainstay, "Beef Stick."

The homo-eroticism of the name was not lost on me, even as a child, even when I had not yet heard the term "homo-eroticism." The shape. The firmness. The name. All of it means Christmas to me.

R112 Try reading the thread before responding.

I remember the stores. The summer sausage is the dry sausage, right? The only sausage I ever liked. I could easily get out the bigger peices of fat in the sausage when it was sluced. My mom always bought these mint candies there for her parties. In the shape of Kisses but yellow, mint green, and I think pink, mint candies with little white bead candies on the bottom. She always kept some in a drawer on the China cabinet and my sister and I would go eat them and she would get upset and tell us they were for company.

R114 Those are sherbet mints, not specific to HF (that shape might be, but generally the same texture/flavor elsewhere).

R114

"These easy-to-make mint candies are perfect for any occasion throughout the year. Simply tint the dough the appropriate color. Friends and family will gobble these up in a jiffy! --Mrs. William Yoder, Bloomfield, Iowa"

1/2 cup unsalted butter, softened 4 1/2 cups confectioners' sugar, sifted 2 TBSP + 2 tsp heavy cream 1 tsp peppermint or spearmint extract Red and green food coloring

1. In large bowl, beat butter until creamy. Add sugar, cream and extract; on low speed, beat until creamy. Divide mixture into thirds into 3 bowls. Tint 1 third pink (1 drop red coloring) and 1 third pastel green (1 drop green); leave remaining third white. Keep at room temperature.

2. Line 2 large baking sheets with nonstick reusable baking-sheet liners or waxed paper (coat baking sheet with cooking spray to prevent liner or paper from pulling up during piping). Scrape white butter mixture into pastry bag fitted with 1/4 inch star tip. Holding bag perpendicular to prepared to sheet, squeeze out 1 inch star on sheet (about 50 total). Repeat with pink and green mixtures.

3. Let air-dry at room temperature overnight. With small spatula, carefully turn mints over to expose bottoms. Let dry, another hour. Transfer with spatula to airtight container. Store at cool room temperature up to 6 weeks.

Stuff it, R113. References to summer sausage are all over this thread, but the Hickory Farms brand name is not. And it is a notable name.

It takes all kinds of critters to make Pepperidge Farm's fritters!

This is Hickory Farms.

Weird

^ Is that foodstuffs? Or gay ammo?

Summer sausage.

The term "Summer Sausage" is not unique to Hickory Farms. It has some connection to Europe as to the time of year they would slaughter the animals and actually make the sausage.

There's this guy who works at the Sunglass Hut who is a cute gayling. I've been putting the moves on him by hissing and giving him lots of free samples. The Indian girl who threads eyebrows has a crush on me. The intellectually disabled mall janitor likes to stop and stare at me. I don't think I'll find love at the mall.

There's this whole underground economy black market thing going on here with sharing/trading employee discounts. You can get fired for doing it. Unfortunately there is nothing I want to buy from Spencer's Gifts, Yankee Candle, or the Limited for Men. And the queens who work at Macy's think they're working at Saks Fifth Avenue.

Bill Taylor should stop by and sample some of your wares.

BILL! Have you tried the kiosks at your local mall in your quest for late-in-life love?

[quote]There's this whole underground economy black market thing going on here with sharing/trading employee discounts.

Really? Interesting!

I used to work in a small burger joint, and sometimes we would "trade food" with the employees of nearby restaurants. Meaning, the employees of, say, Subway would make subs for us, and we'd make burgers and fries for them, but no money changed hands (and the food was written off as waste). It only happened occasionally, and of course only when the bosses/owners weren't around.

R122 that should go in the fridge, but not in the BOTTOM!

Those strawberry candies are similar to the type of nasty candy your Aunt Ethel would have in the bottom of her purse. They taste like lost hope,

OP sounds like he also has "cradled a mug" a time or two.

I started cradling my mugs after learning about the stigma on DL. I love cradling! Also very few of our products need refrigeration. Most of them are vacuume packed. We have a small cooler for our cheese balls, spreads and our world famous Chudder!!!!! That's right! Chudder! Is it Cheddar or is it butter? Neither. It's Chudder you bitches!

a true delight for the mind and eye!

I shudder at "Chudder."

The guy at the Sunglass Hut is hot. I hope he's a slut. The Hut Slut.

I asked this in some mall thread but you can actually give me an answer, thanks! Do you still by some chance sell the liquor flavored hard candies? That came in flavors like Sloe Gin Fizz? I am dying to find them again, sure there was no actual alcohol in them but they tasted amazing.

I love those damn mint meltaways.

Sorry no more liquor flavored candies. We have other sweets and chocolates that are quite good. Tr

I live in Wisconsin and have accidentally used the British “ou” many times. It comes from reading British mysteries, I think. It means nothing. Don’t be so picky.

Great thread. My fondest memories are of humble family Christmas Eves when Grandma served Hickory Farms or Swiss Colony cheese and sausage. We sat in the kitchen, listening to holiday music on her tinny radio. Nothing better.

Hickory Farms was always a go to shop for last minute gifts for my Dad. Mmmm processed meat, and a triple by-pass at 60.

I feel I must crash this party to bring it taste and refinement

What a great thread! R126 as soon as I saw the title of this post BILL was the first thing I thought of

And am I the only DLer would would love to have one of those aprons? "Try Some of My Sausage"!! I know someone who'd wear that at our next football tailgate

OP - Have "Scott" and "Stefan" stopped by yet?

Is the stuff they sell at Target legit HF product?

In the 80's my family would buy HF "Beef Log" at Christmas. Is that the same thing as the "summer sausage"?

I had completely forgotten about Chudder. I don't know whether to praise this thread or curse it.

Oh please God don't let this be OP!

OP, is it true most people do not shop at malls anymore, even in flyover states?

Did OP survive the Black Friday rush? Any good stories to tell?

Is he still alive, or was he beaten to death with a beef stick?

Do you sell Spanish saw-sheg?

I think the OP sounds like a very sweet man.

I learned that Summer Sausage is called such, as it does not need to be refrigerated. I love the DL.

Thank you very much OP!

OP hard at work

OP could you please tell your fellow employee "Vivian" that uptalk and vocal fry is annoying and makes people not respect you? Thanks!

Where do you think sow-sage comes from, Joan?

Is this one of those high end malls in Flyover that also has a Harry and David's?

Some of you are real jerks. I love this thread.

[QUOTE] Where do you think sow-sage comes from, Joan?

The supermarket, R152

Hickory Farms is still around and still a thing" I haven't read the entire thread, but wow. Memories of my childhood.

same here R156.

I saw Hickory Farms products in Target last weekend. It wasn't the same...

r19 chicory is a pretty blue/violet flower and they use chicory root for something like coffee substitute...

a friend of mine came home for the holidays and someone gifted him a large basket of hickory farms foods. he didn't have much money so he lived off the basket for almost a week. he saved money on food and had more for drinks. anyway he ended up in the hospital with what he thought was oncoming death. he had so much discomfort and collicky pain he thought he was having a heart attack and fled to the emergency room. they did all these tests and could find nothing wrong with him. the doctor listened to his lower back and abdomen and asked him if he had been eating any processed meats and cheeses. i almost died laughing. when he told the doctor in the ER what he had done with the hickory farms basket, the doctor said it might be a few more days of discomfort, and to avoid doing that in the future. he said eating all that cured crap can give you an intestinal blockage.

Any updates OP? I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and a great 2018.

I love this thread. OP sounds great. I say you should go after the Sunglasses Hut Slut with all you've got. Give him a kielbasa and then wiggle your eyebrows suggestively. He'll swoon.

Not sure how good my memory is, but I think when I was a teenager I used to buy this port wine cheese spread at Hickory Farms. It was sort of cheddar-colored with a ribbon of pink running through it. Anyone else remember it?

Is there a Honey Baked Ham kiosk nearby or are they only found in more upscale malls?

When you see Hickory Farms products at Target, JC Penny or Wal-Mart they are usually packaged in smaller quantities with lower price points. I've always suspected that they are also of a slightly lower quality. Also at the kiosk we only sell beef and turkey sausages but you can get pork products in some delis and supermarkets.

Thank you for chiming in, OP! I was concerned you had forgotten your loving fans on. DL!

Have there been any particularly hideous customers you want to talk about?

Any hot guys with a big beef stick?

Hickory Farms discontinued their port wine cheese spread, but Kaukauna is going gangbusters with theirs in tub, log and nut ball options!!!

Sorry guys for not keeping up with the pace of the questions. I was informed recently that I was behind on my quota for distributed samples and am on "probation." I'm not really concerned because when you're an eldergay living in your parents' basement and not getting laid much, if at all, it puts your life and what's important in perspective. Back back to you and you inquiries. . . . We have very strict rules regarding how we prepare and distribute the samples. We usually have a health inspector visit us a couple of times over the season. We have plastic gloves that we must wear at all times. They are very cheap, rip easily and are difficult to put on. Everytime you ring someone up or touch any other products you have to put on a new pair. I purchase my own gloves. There is no hairnet but occasionally hair gets in the sample tray and when a customer points that out to me I am horrified and we must throw out the entire tray. Likewise if someone helps themselves to one of the samples instead of me handing them some sausage and cheese on the stick the entire tray must be thrown out. We all have our own individual techniques to try to prevent this from happening. It's sort of like mixed martial arts. Sometimes I lose my patience and when people sneak past me like when I turn my head for a minute or there is a group of people surrounding me and they just help themselves. Then I yell, "Don't Do That!" or as soon as they take some I turn around from them and the crowd and throw the entire thing away so they see what they have done. It's actually sort of funny. Most people are apologetic. I apologize a little as well. The people who don't apologize or don't get the mention are deplorables.

living in your parent's basement

OP, that is such delightful creative writing.

oh Mary, the whole sample tray ordeal would stress me out

You'd never last a day at Costco. Maybe Trader Joe's.

Do you buy your cheese and sausage at Costco, OP?

Perfect job for me.

The Port Wine Cheese spread has not been permanently discontinued. There are three different refrigerated spreads that are sold each year and they rotate them. Big Kahuna spreads are made of Velveeta.

There is this middle aged woman in a wheelchair who gets dropped off at the mall at 9 am everyday and is then picked up around 4. She doesn't look disabled in any way. We've tried interrogating her many times about why she lives at the mall, who drops her off and picks her up, where does she live and the like but while she is talkative she never answers the questions. She eats a lot of samples and asks a lot of product questions. Then she wheels away saying thank you she's going to have to think about it. A few days before Christmas she'll buy a few small items.

OP, she obviously keeps coming back for samples. If you cut her supply off, she'll go find somewhere else to live.

Do the sausages grow on trees or on vines?

What type of wine do you recommend with summer sausage? Why do they even call it summer sausage? Wouldn't "Holiday Sausage" be more appropriate? And just how long is your sausage?

Do you recommend dipping your sausage in mustard?

I buy my port wine cheese ball, covered in slivered almonds @ Aldi's for $2.49, and it is the best I've tasted!

And Specialty Select crackers ( butter crisp or garden vegetable ) for $1.69/box.

Can you beat those prices?

Do they still make their Holiday Blend coffee? I loved that stuff, but it's probably $25 a bag now.

R175.........Maybe she lives on the upper floor of the mall in one of those micro apartments. Living in malls is all the rage now! One stop living and shopping, all under one roof!

And an endless supply of free samples!

I'm in AA. If I hate one of those wine/cheese balls would that be a slip? They look so attractive.

Have not hate. WTFs wrong with spell check, have is a word!

OP, if you are an eldergay living in your parents' basement... how fucking old are your parents? How much longer before Tara becomes yours?

Can you be lactose intolerant and still be able to sell cheese?

This is an ideal eldergay flyover retirement option. Are there any gay organizations in your area, OP, to keep you busy when not doing this?

r182 [quote]WTFs wrong with spell check, have is a word!

But "chedder" isn't.

Do they still sell the cheese variety pack shrink wrapped with the complimentary set of three trivets of graduated sizes. Always such a tasteful gift.

Is organic milk used when making the cheese? Where does the milk come from what Farm?

OP, are you cut?

OP, are you hung?

Way to fucking kill the thread R190

OP do you know where the Italian Swiss Colony is?

I am not hung but I'm a grower. I am cut. The Italian Swiss Colony? No. I never heard of it. I don't know anything about the milk used in our products or where any of them are made. They don't tell us. The only exception is the Summer Sausage. We are told that it is made in North America. We don't have any gift pack with trivets in it but I'll let corporate know you were asking.

I dont think I could stop feeding the woman who lives in the mall. She wears tacky holiday sweaters and reindeer antlers. I kind of like her. She only takes three or four samples a day.

[quote]The Italian Swiss Colony?

Italian Swiss Colony was a winery in northern California. They were famous for their "Little Old Winemaker - Me!" commercials.

SWISS Colony is (was?) a mail order firm that sold products similar to what Hickory Farms offers. Figi's is another one.

Thanks for the Swiss Italian Colony report.

r195, thanks for undoing my cornfusion:

Did you survive OP? Do they still have after Christmas sales to get rid of anything leftover, or are you finished for the season?

[quote] I'm an underemployed basement dwelling overeducated eldergay

I didn't think overeducation was possible in an age where you have to have experience to get your foot in the door.

I was gifted the "Beef Hearty Hickory Gift Box" this year. The summer sausage is pretty good, better if you remove the casing first though! I ate it with my first slice - is it edible? The sweet hot mustard is good too. I wouldn't mind having more of it. The crackers were crushed, interesting because the box wasn't. And the less said about the shelf stable cheeses, the better.

I, too. hope you had a wonder Christmas OP.

OP, you should seriously consider turning this into a short story, novella or something more. Really.

We should help him with a title R201.

"My life among the beef sticks"

"Free Samples are for Fatties"

"Please Hold my Cheese Balls"

The Hickory Farms Chronicle.

Thought of you HF insider, when a sweet, elderly neighbor (whom I look out for) gave me a "Warm & Hearty Welcome" gift box for XMAS. :-D

This reminds me of a field trip to the sourdough bread factory.

Did you get a lot of desperate last minute shoppers in need of a holiday basket, OP?

Where are you, HF Insider?

How are your cheese balls?

This year, has the kiosk been able to upgrade to one of the vacant storefronts that comprise 40% of your mall?

Last year you were a hoot, OP, I hope you are still alive.

I hope you are well OP and have a wonderful Christmas and a great 2019.

How did the heroin addict turn out, OP?

I did enjoy this thread last year.