Let's be A Period Piece Film

I'm the ball room scene

I'm Glenn Close trying really hard to win an Oscar with this performance

I’m the sweeping, romantic score

I'm the aria by Handel

I'm the hairstyles that are actually of the time that the movie was made in. If I'm a film set in 1862 but made in 1965 , all of the women will have mid century bouffants.

I’m the debate about which are and are not real period pieces.

I’m the Oscar for Best Costume Design

I'm author Jane Austen

I'm Henry James

I’m the hope for a best costume design Oscar

I'm director James Ivory.

I’m Marisa Berenson

Helena Bonham Carter

I’m tea.

I’m Sir John Gielgud

I’m the British moorlands

I am the "GOLDEN BOWL" Why is this FISH picking me up...I do not have a crack on me!!

I'm the will they/won't they of Anthony Hopkins and Emma Thompson

I'm Bob Balaban playing the only American in the all-British cast

I'm the forbidden gay or lesbian love. I can only be acknowledged in furtive and longing glances.

I'm the one nude scene to get an R rating

I'm the breasts. I'm usually much larger and rounder than I would have appeared in the clothing of whatever time the movie is from, especially if corsets are involved.

I'm the Starbucks cup left on set that shows up in a few shots

I'm the Strauss waltz at the obligatory ball scene

I'm Keanu Reeves throwing the whole thing out of whack.

I'm the murder

I am the "Tour of Italy"; they always have to tour Italy. Venice, here I cum!!

I'm the twenty pounds of shifts, pantalettes, underslips, overslips, corsets, birdcage hoops, and bodices it takes the actress's dresser two hours to put on and over the actress's head, and fasten with hooks, ribbons, and laces. The actress's furious rant during this process, and as she staggers in us to the soundstage, are unprintable.

Meanwhile, the dresser keeps muttering to herself, "It could be worse, it could be worse: I could have to launder it all."

I'm the room with a view.

I'm E.M. Forster. My contributions to this genre are only slightly fewer than Austen's, but several planets higher in literary value.

I'm the coach brought on to teach the actress's how to walk in this shit, because most of them waddle in the costumes.

Can someone PLEASE remind the actresses that only whores lift their skirts with BOTH hands?!

Ladies of virtue lift the skirt with one hand and to the side when managing stairs.

^*actresses (not actress's)

I'm the faux jewellery. I fool no one.

I'm the real jewellery looking sadly on. It's too too bad they don't borrow me from places like Grey's in Bond Street - the faux shit fools no one, and it so brings down the look of the piece.

It's how they cheap out on filming cost: the insurance, you know.

I'm the powered wigs.

I'm the hairpieces needed to replicate all those chignons, buns, and braids. The actresses all go home with migraines.

I'm the satin breeches. Wink wink . . .

I'm the faux beauty mark applied last to the face.

You can always tell who the Bad Girl is, because, oddly, the Nice Girls don't wear them.

I’m the hundred thousand dollar antique guitar borrowed from a museum that gets smashed by accident because it wasn’t switched out with the prop one at the last minute.

I’m the 1970s character actress who shows up in one or two scenes.

I'm the dresser stationed at the loo, because I have to pick up all that cloth and hold it up while the actresses pee.

And, yes, there IS a slit in those pantalettes.

I'm Beethoven's Razumovsky quartet that is the main feature of the score. The audience doesn't know me from a hole in the ground. and then when the credits roll at the end, nod knowingly, "Ah, the Razumovsky!"

I'm Maggie Smith's performance. You've seen me 1,256 times, since 1962, but you never tire of me.

I'm Maggie Smith's Oscar for Best Supporting Actress.

I'm American actress Anne Bancroft portraying Madge Kendal, the greatest tragic actress of her day.

I'm the gun wrangler.

I'm Michelle Pfeiffer 's face screaming "california 1990's" while sipping my tea in a lovely gown

I'm the dinner place settings, which have been laid out in excruciating meticulous detail, and yet historians will always find some minute flaw.

And I'm John Malkovitch's Midwestern r-colored mumble, sprinkled with an inconsistent dash of British vowels.

I'm Luchino Visconti. My movies are untolerable snoozefests, but I get to fuck all these lovely european male stars, and some of the americans too, which is my main reason for making them. Oddly, because I put some Classical music and litterary references in them, I can even sell 3 hours of a elderly pedo chasing teenage ass, and clueless females italian teachers the world over will bring their classes to watch me.

I'm a heaving bodice.

I'm the Charlie Rose interview with the director right before the film hits theaters

I'm a rouged and powered bosom.

I'm the parlor palm.

I'm Ralph Nathaniel Twisleton-Wykeham-Fiennes, #1 on the call-sheet.

I'm the GO-BETWEEN .I'm the most perfect IMDB entry ever. Every name in me is the peak in their craft. I win Grand Prix at cannes. I don't even get a DVD release.

I'm snuff.

[quote] I'm Bob Balaban playing the only American in the all-British cast

I'm Ryan phillippe, and I'm no chopped liver

I'm the consultant on court dances and the language of the fan.

I’m an E.M. Foster gay undercurrent. EMF is so wonderful to read.

I'm Geraldine Chaplin. Thank God I don't have to live off my acting career, because I'll be guest #3 again

I'm Christine Baranski, the inevitable addition to the cast . I can't wait to go head-to-head with Maggie Smith.

I'm 'Oh my dear little father' which along with 'No one sleeps' are the only two opera arias moviegoers know. The means class!

I am the Black Man cast in the lead. Even though it is a biopic, we will just ask the audience to use their imagination.

I’m the large manor house that can trace my family back to Adam and Eve. The conflict is that I am entailed to a stranger and the current residents are creating drama around it.

I'm the french star who was originally cast as the lead. I had interminable lists of demands, arrived late for the shooting in the farthest possible hotel, fucked my married costar, complained that I wasn't treated with the respect I'm entitled to, since I've worked once 15 years ago with Truffaut/Godard/Fellini/Polanski/Welles, fucked my other married co-star, had a nervous breakdown, refused any kind of contact with the press before/during/after the shooting, all in the first week, and finally stromed off the set saying I couldn't possibly play that part, since I have a young husband, and my character is supposed to be over 30. I have to be replaced and all my scenes reshot. People wonder why I 'm so scarce on the big screen, outside my homeland

I'm the royal crown derby

I'm the dying heiress, completely unaware that my emotions are being TRIFLED WITH!

I'm Ryan Phillippe's scottish accent. I'm from a part of Scotland where very few people have actually been. The part where Brigadoon also is.

I'm the dialect coach hired for Ryan Phillippe, Keanu Reeves, John Malkovitch, Michelle Pfeiffer, Winona Ryder et al.

I'm Keira Knightly, yet again.

I'm Kiera Knightley's pout. Remember me ? I was everywhere in the 2000s

sorry R72, parrallel thinking

Jinx! @R73

I'm the thrifty box-office returns

I am The Cold. If an Austen heroine dares to go for a solitary walk, it will surely rain and I will befall her, even unto threatening her life and propelling the remainder of the plot. Oddly, no one suffering under me ever sneezes or blows their noses but all nearly die of me.

I'm the Heroin's aunt. I'm a haughty, cold-hearted, immensely wealthy dragon living in a humongous mansion on the outskirt of town. My husband inevitably died 45 years ago. I have a very curly wig. Everybody, in fact, depends on me one way or the other.

R77 - Oh dear. Please fetch my smelling salts as I sink elegantly to the fainting couch.

I'm the orphanage scenes in the first 20 minutes.

I'm the spaniels and the pugs.

I'm the oscar won by the historically inaccurate costumes

I'm Brad Pitt. I'm Julia Roberts. And I'm Bob Redford. It's best if we don't try the accent. ( But don't bother changing the script to make us Amerrrican.)

I'm "this" , as in "what,even, is this ?" I'm a pinafore of sorts

I'm the well known Picasso painting that was NEVER on the Titanic, but who cares ?

I’m Lilian Hellman, mining my past for good personal stories to make into period piece films that are lies, all lies.

I'm the horribly self-conscious bad actress playing Lilian Hellman. You know who I am

I'm the unconspicuous wood bench that will finds its way into the "random movie prop items you would like to own" thread on DL in 50 years from now

We’re the dueling actors both playing Truman Capote telling the same story in two different films released less than a year apart because Hollywood has such a hard time coming up with original ideas. One of us had the good grace to have Catherine Keener as our Harper Lee, the other one, unfortunately, Sandra Bullock.

I'm the anal movie watcher who can't wait to add something to IMDB's Goofs section. Something like the 1963 Ford Galaxie's rear interior door locks were 3.25 inches from the door edge. This car's locks are 3.5 inches from the edge. This clearly a 1964 Galaxy, not a 1963 model. Geezus, everybody knows this.

I’m the book to movie adaptation.

I’m the three quarter length sleeve that was actually a half inch higher between 1906 and 1912 when the film is set that they always get wrong.

I’m the lead female who is all to self aware of her circumstance. You might even say my views on feminism are a few centuries ahead of it’s time.

I'm the aging Hollywood diva trying to out-wig all these young european beauties. I want to be SEEN

If I'm from the golden age, I'm the score by Franz Waxman, Erich Korngold or Max Steiner. Unless I'm from MGM and Herbert Stothart did my score for less money. I'm second tier but LB is too tone deaf to hear the diference.

I’m the geographically nonsensical mishmash casting of UK accents all together in one family or location because the target Americans audience will never notice anyway.

I'm the only ever actress who knew how to move in a period dress

I'm this british actor with a long nose and pale eyes you've seen in every period piece film for a short few years, and then never again. Apart from my curly hair that looked good in the rain, I've aged like unrefrigirated custard. I do Shakespeare now mostly, I'm touring a lot.

I’m the Mid Atlantic accent that evened out the vocals in American production castings in period films and made them feel timeless and regionless.

R92 Women are fierce queens who will not be gaslit by narcissistic Old White Men. By the way, I would like to be referred to as They, rather than she, going forward.

I'm the international cast playing russian aristocracy with a vague standard english accent

R66 I am Catherine Deneuve? Bridgette Bardot? Geneviève Bujold? I honestly can't think of anyone else

R101 I'm a mix of Anna Karina, Isabella Aggiani, Simone Signoret and Anouk Aimee

R102 Gotcha. I figured it was a mix, but I was close lol

I'm Christopher Plummer and I am going to hate this film for forever

I'm The Cartier Jewelry in ‘The Great Gatsby’

Oh dear, r77...

I am the slave cast, below the servant class, that was forced to build and maintain the properties that is accurately depicted in these period piece adaptions.

Oh wait, they are never mentioned or seen.

I'm the tree lined approach to the grand estate.

I'm the clippety-clop of horse's hooves heard menacingly in the middle of the night, almost certainly bringing bad news.

I'm the innkeeper obsequiously bowing and scraping as the aristos descend from the coach for a bit of refreshment.

I'm the coach and four. I am just possibly the most uncomfortable vehicle for travel ever developed. As soon as the director calls, "Cut!" the actors get out and start groaning and clutching their backs, barely able to walk. Even though they haven't really travelled for two days in me. Trust me: a half hour will cripple you for life.

And why those narrow little wobbly steps out the door don't collapse under the weight of the ladies costumes, I don't know. I'm waiting for it. It will absolutely, totally, memorably, make my day.

I’m the fop you’re all wondering about.

We're the four pulling the coach. We're specially trained. The poor sod of an actor they've got playing the coachmen, clearly wasn't. For a brass farthing, we'd trample him underfoot.

I’m the busty gal in the English Hammer films that always seems to attract the vampire.

I'm the vast kitchen where roasted suckling pig revolves on a spit in a giant fireplace, whilst stout women in white caps and muslin dresses with white fichus across their bosoms pluck fowl and make pudding.

I'm the leeches the local doctor applies to the pale arms of the heroine to try to cure her mysterious malady - she is, in fact, enceinte, but no one knows it yet.

I'm the duel. I am either rapiers or pistols, depending on the century. But no period epic is complete without me.

I'm the white Romeo shirts with billowy sleeves the duellists usually wear.

Occasionally it's a frock coat, if it's really cold out.

I’m the anachronistic hairdos that inevitably appear in every period film.

I’m the evil head maid who will try to ruin the main protagonists from behind the scenes.

I'm Janet Suzman and I am on loan from the Royal Shakespeare Company

I am those voluminous hooded velvet cloaks the ladies wear when they silently run away in the middle of the night.

I'm the hunchbacked nun

I'm the foolscap the villain writes his confession on just before the hero is hanged for the villain's crime, it is so delicious the way the quill pen scratches on me as he writes.

I'm the gallows in the town square. Sooner or later, I will play an important part in this film.

If the film is earlier than the 17th century, I become the block.

I am the women in the audience, privately wondering how the fuck those women survived without tampons.

I'm the bodice ripping sex scene.

I am the despairing look the heroine gives her lover as she is married off to a man whom she not only does not love, but who is 30 years older than she is.

R128 I am that man and my name is Sam Neill.

I'm Lorna Doone.

I'm also the Prisoner of Zenda.

I'm also the Count of Monte Cristo.

I'm also Barry Lyndon.

I'm also Newland Archer.

I'm also the Scarlet Pimpernel.

I'm also Sidney Carton.

And Edgar Linton.

^*I forgot, I'm also Mr Rochester

(I refuse to be Heathcliff - that man was a fucking sociopath)

I'm the locket the orphanage kept as the only clue to the identity of the infant left on the convent doorstep 17 years ago.

Eventually, the locket will prove my owner's noble lineage and I will be passed on to his son one day.

I'm the candles.

I'm the chamber pot.

I'm le droit de seigneur.

I'm the fat cook.

I'm the Duke of Madeuptitle

I'm especially the women characters' hairstyles and costume shoulder silhouettes that are most likely reflective of the time in which the period piece is filmed (plus the Mary who, of course, will notice and write this...!).

I’m Melinda going after the wrong man and regretting it for years to come. I guess you could say that it was Not a clear day.

I’m not even sure I can say I was in a period film. Well, as Scarlett O’hara once said to Rhett Butler once…partly.

R96 I beg your pardon?!

I'm that pesky issue that always dogs the heroine: love or money?

I am Errol Flynn and Basil Rathbone.

We were born for period costume.

You can take the boy out of Sherwood Forest, but . . .

I'm the contrast between the silk and lace dresses of the well born ladies, and the brown muslin of the servant girls.

I am Lenski's aria from "Eugene Onegin", sung before I head off to a duel with my former friend, and Tchaikovsky's exquisite music make it clear Lenski is going to lose as he sets off in his frock coat and high hat to meet his second and get on with it.

I'm the setting. You only get five choices:

United Kingdom

France

Russia

China

United States

I'm a young English actor whose twinkdom was captured on film. Enjoy it, 'cos it's brief. Ah well, I'll trade up and thanks to the BBC/PBS/RSC/LCT (take care of T-C-B!), I'll never tire for work or respect.

I'm the extraordinary amounts of red meat, wine, mead, ale, and pastry making the tables in the grand halls groan.

These people should all be dead by forty.

I’m the music that gets loud and ominous when walks into the room a guy you thought was just an o.k. bloke and turns out to be the bad guy.

I'm the two young and inexperienced actors that have to carry this period piece.

The supporting cast outshine us- Tom Baker, Jack Hawkins, Sir Michael Redgrave, Eric Porter, Harry Andrews, Maurice Denham, Timothy West, Irene Worth, Michael Bryant, Ian Holm, John Wood, Brian Cox, Julian Glover, John Neville, and Lord Laurence Olivier

I'm Jenna Malone, and I hold the distinction of being the only actress in any period drama who's appropriate ripened lack of hygiene comes straight through the silver screen. I look as though I haven't had a good bath in six weeks, and that is how it should be - being true to the period.

I'm all that repressed emotion. Sometimes I implode, sometimes I explode.

I see your Jenna Malone and raise you by Gerard Depardieu in Danton.

I’m Mr Darcy. Who will play me again next in yet another remake of P&P?

R149 You left out Stanley Baker, Paul Scofield, Trevor Howard, and Robert Shaw.

I'm the highwayman lurking in a stand of trees for the coach carrying Lady Stanley-Gascoigne and her jewel box.

I am ten times the man her cranky husband is, and she'll give me more than that box after ten minutes.

I’m Julie’s tampon.

Who would that be R97?

I'm Sir Ralph Richardson. I will playing the no nonsense widower who thinks my daughter is fugly and will never marry for love.

I'm the feeling of being faint from "the vapors."

I'm the decadent male lothario whose sole purpose is to spoil the heroin and destroy her. Proof of my evil ? I 'collect china'...Y'all know what that means (wink wink)

I'm the caracter actor who plays the mother/father of the lead, even though I'm only 12 years older than they are.

I’m the weight of second hour tedium that ensures an Oscar nod.

I’m the disappointingly framed full frontal male nudity included for saucy publicity interviews and blu-ray sales to timid gay guys.

I'm the British Empire

I'm the rose garden in which the plain but wealthy county catch proposes to the heroine, who accepts him in order to save the family estate.

In the end, she realises he's worth ten of the handsome Hussar she's been pining for, but who was two-timing her with the rich widow in the next county.

I could have told her that, but who listens to roses?

I'm the respectable but not well born lass who captures the heart of the Duke's heir. The family isn't having it. It's going to have to be Gretna Green. Then there will be nothing they can do with it.

I'm the country bumpkin who saves the day by delivering this so important message to the Countess atthe last minute

I'm Gretna Green. Oh, the stories I could tell!

I'm smelling salts. I have a busy life, a very busy life.

I'm the lead in all the pewter dishes they eat off.

I'm the male clothes the heroine dresses in to run off to meet her lover at an inn.

Amazingly, I fit her perfectly, and she looks quite, er, toothsome as a young man, I must say.

I'm the seconds at the duel. No one pays the slightest attention to us, and we are, after all crucial to the legitimacy of the outcome!

I'm the military officer character

I'm the hay in the hayloft.

I'm the opera overture played during the closing credits

I am the interior color palette. Monochromatic but with colors unfamiliar to today’s tastes; Teal dining rooms, canary yellow salons, raspberry colored drawing rooms, sanguine red bedrooms. You get the idea.

I'm the 2nd movement of Beethoven's 7th Symphony. I'm often worked into the background score to add gravitas and class.

I'm Vanessa Redgrave's stupid, ecstatic smile.

I'm the bumbling village vicar with a giveaway red face.

R179 Simon Callow is that you ? WHET you, dear ?

I'm her

I'm the silk purse dangling by a cord from the heroine's wrist. You have no more idea what I contain than you did the Queen's purses.

And that's as it should be.

I'm the tapestries hiding the rot in the grand homes' walls and keeping out the mighty draughts in winter.

We only do period pieces set in the UK, because we can only do a British accent and play grand dame roles.

[quote]I'm the one nude scene to get an R rating

As a horny middle schooler in the early '90s with no access to video/print porn, I used to rent period movies from the '70s and '80s (particularly foreign) to get my rocks off. I knew there was bound to be male nudity. 😂

Thankfully, my family got internet connection in 1996, when I was a junior.

R184 Didn't they do some India and Italy ones too?

R44 Maggie Smith didn't win her Supporting Oscar for a period film. CALIFORNIA SUITE was set in then contemporary 1978 though now that era (forty-four years ago) is considered period, I suppose.

Man, to think that in 1978, forty-four years ago was 1934!

I'm the horses. Don't believe that shit at the end of the credits where they state that "No animal was harmed during the filming of this production".

I’m Miss Havisham. The best damn period piece that was never had. Bow down bitches.

I'm the footpad. You will never see anything but my shadow.

I'm the crone in the broken down cottage at the edge of the wood. The young women seek me out because they know I can predict the future. They always bring me a gift: a few coins, some tobacco, some eggs, even a bit of port. It's not much, but it's a living.

I really can see the future, but I have to be careful, or I'll end up at the stake.

In other words, I am an old crone who can see the future playing an old crone who can see the future so I appear as an old crone chivvying silly young women along for some money, tobacco, eggs, and sometimes a bit of port.

If they only knew.

I'm the witty retort delivered in exactly the same manner by Dame Maggie Smith for the last 50 years to rapturous wonder by armies of wizened homosexuals across the English speaking world...and beyond...

I'm the Horned God. After those fertility festivals that the peasants persist in holding, God love them, I can't walk for days.

R192 "Wizened"? Who are you calling "wizened" sirrah!

I'm the expression "La!" which not one lady of the Regency period ever uttered in her life.

I'm Tintagel Castle, and as you know, the walls have ears.

And if you believe for one moment that Igraine didn't know Uther wasn't Gorlois, you'll probably believe everything you see in yet another bloody filming of the Arthurian legend.

I'm the handsome but dead-eyed young actor haunted by Franco Zeffirelli's midnight visits to his hotel room, his needy and clammy hands, his semi-erect cock and bad breath.

I'm the highwayman.

The Highwayman came riding, riding, riding…

I'm the costumes from "Nicholas and Alexandra," "Zhivago" AND "McCabe & Mrs. Miller" that are all supposedly period films but TOTALLY 70's, who did they think they were fooling?

I'm also Denholm Elliott.

I’m the CGI. You didn’t really think they built all those fancy shmancy sets and buildings, did you?

Meet my partner, Green Screen.

R199 I'm Bess, plaiting a dark red love knot in my long black hair.

I'm the rhythmic thumping of the tell-tale heart, beating steadily, as we lay quitely next to one another, sharing but one cover in the room of all the matronly aunties, their husbands and spawn... howling winds, creeking wood beams, have nothing on Gertrude's snore.

r199 I'm the Lady of Shalott... you might come riding, riding, riding but I'm just going to lie there dead until I nearly drown, forced to clean to a post for life until my raven haired beauty, my eternal rival, comes to rescue me and I reluctantly surrender myself onto him.

I'm R43 = I'm Maggie Smith's performance. You've seen me 1,256 times, since 1962, but you never tire of me.

[quote]R192 I'm the witty retort delivered in exactly the same manner by Dame Maggie Smith for the last 50 years to rapturous wonder by armies of wizened homosexuals across the English speaking world...and beyond...

R192, aren't you ashamed of yourself ? is taht what you do ? are you Amy Schumer, stealing other peoples's jokes ?

I'm Kiera Knightley's complete lack of talent

I'm the Americsn accents!

I don't know why they keep putting Keira Knightley in period dramas. She's too thin and morose for the eras.

I'm the corsets.

If I'm in a British film, I will be correct for the period and look as uncomfortable as hell. If I'm in an American film, I will be some colorful satiny thing that looks like it came from Victoria's Secret, and I'll probably be worn on the outside of the gown!

I'm Julia Roberts' costume in her one attempt at period drama, screaming for casting to give it a rethink and put someone who looks like she belongs in something besides a miniskirt in the role.

And it wasn't even that far back.

Christ, Neeson would have looked better in that midi-blouse and skirt

Did we need to add her to The Troubles?!

Incidentally, Brit Emma Watson is very anti-corsets (she says they are symbols of female oppression or something) and has refused to wear them even in period films.

This is why I hate us.

My friend though having her period in 6th grade was cool cause she said she could piss blood

I’m the affected, pretentious acting style.

I'm Columbia Pictures, and we are proud to present....

I'm Ruth Prawer Jhabvala!

I’m the smell of mothballs. All of those 1960 vintage wool suits the extras are wearing reek of me.

I'm the Gothuc script the credits and titles are done in.

Don't even bother, no one else can decipher them, either

^*Gothic

I'm an antique book somebody is reading. For some reason producers always use us yellowed, brittle books or magazines from the actual era their period films are set in even though we would have been new at the time.

I'm also the 8 Academy Award nominations (no more/no less) for dull shit like Best Adapted Screenplay, Costume Design, Original Score, etc. and never for the acting or directing.

I’m taking my carriage over to Larkrise with a basket full of Chillicothe sandwiches. I have a distinctive lilt in my voice to draw the line between town and country. I’m also taking the doctor to treat the young country child suffering from Biliousness, we’ve brought leeches!

Speaking of period films, they are finally making a movie of Are You There God, it’s Me Margaret.

I'm the end credits that label the actors and characters "The Players" besides "Cast"

I'M THE COLONEL BEING UNEXPECTEDLY AND MYSTERIOUSLY CALLED BACK TO LONDON in the middle of a picnic, whisked away on my horse, leaving my females guest aghast and vulnerable to their seducer

Who is Christopher Brandon?

Let's try notable historical whores for a thousand, Ken.

I'm tea laid in the expansive grounds on a languid summer afternoon, with antique china, linen and silver, and a table laden with sandwiches (no crusts), and cakes by that insufferable Mrs Crocombe Hardcover who does those frightening recipes "The Victorian Way".

I'm Julie Christie elegantly brooding in a hammock

I'm Alan Bates looking untolerably sexy

I'm the chamber pots under the bed they never show being used.

During Lockdown I started to watching Eastenders on Daily Motion from its first episode. I think it stated early 1980s (close enough). It occurred to me that that is now a period piece.

^ Or the horse shit which would have been all over the streets and roads. Excepting the London ball arrival scene in S and S "Do be careful as the horses have been here!" - Mrs. Jennings

I'm the horse shit falling straight from the horse's ass on the perfect manicured lawn in DEATH ON THE NILE overture shot plop plop plop

I'm the token American actor/actress in an otherwise all British cast

I'm Kevin Spacey, sexually harassing all the good-looking actors and crew members behind the scenes

Or I'm the British actor playing an American role and sound distinctly un-American.

I'm the lack of contractions in the dialogue.

I'm the absence of all bodily functions, odd for any era.

I'm the plucked eyebrows, shimmery highlighter, and L'oreal Voluminous Mascara on the 19th century maiden

[quote] I'm the lack of contractions in the dialogue.

Except for shan’t and daren’t.

I'm Jeremy Northam. I know y'all wish to see more of me

I'm the maddeningly dim candlelight in the dining room for artistic verisimilitude.

I'm the below stairs hierarchy.

I'm the hilarious nightcaps worn to bed.

I'm the hot gamekeeper the Lady of the 'Ouse pines for, always hanging about with a rifle in the crook of his elbow.

I'm the quadrille danced only after supper.

I'm the framed needlepoint piece that the actresses pierce repeatedly in the drawing room as if they actually knew what the fuck they were doing.

I'm the strawberry eaten lasciviously by the heroin

I'm the rogue who cheats at cards, going through my fortune like water and disgracing the family name. Eventually, I will put a bullet through my head.

"I'm the strawberry eaten lasciviously by the heroin"

Oh, DEAR!

I'm the actresses with long flowing hair in a 1920s period piece. We were too vain to cut our hair into a bob.

I'm the actors and actresses in the same movie with orange spray tans and gym bodies

I'm the bought marmalade

I'm the crimson silk gown worn at the ball where every other young woman is wearing white or pale pink satin. Subtle I'm not, but how else would you know my possessor is DOOMED.

I'm the PERIOD PIECE FILM of the MUSICAL sort. I've decided this time that my cast would sing LIVE on set. The industry is so shocked that the first reaction is to throw awards at me like it were raining oscars. After the dust settles, I become an legendary object of horror and ridicule. looking at you , Russell C.

I'm the infant in swaddling clothes left on the doorstep of the orphanage.

I'm the Lord of the Manor who, oddly, although long married, only has three children, whilst his tenants in their thatched roof cottages seem to have swarms of them.

I'm male primogeniture.

The Queen may have gotten rid of it for the royal line of succession, but I'm hanging on in the hereditary peerage.

Without me, 60% of those story lines would either.

R257 only has three *legitimste* children!

Like c any gentleman, he has at least 20 bastards.

I'm the shitter down which went straight the career of Hilary Swank, famously unknown double best actress oscar winner

Am I "to the manor born, or to the manner born, ?" , Datalounge's enduring controversy, second only to the pasta draining scandal.

R251 You may well arsk. In looking it up, I found it used both ways legitimately.

I'm DAME EDITH EVANS

^I'm Dame Flora Robson.

I'm the sound of horns blowing and hounds baying as the hunt commences.

I am the sound of civilised savagery, and the audience know it.

I'm Deborah Kerr as The Governess

I'm the remarkably good teeth displayed by people living in an age of brutal dentistry and on diets that probably rotted their teeth by twenty.

I'm the strawberry jelly that Gene put on the tampon for his table-scaping competition.

I'm Sir Robert, I'm Prince Amerigo, I'm sir Robert again, I'm Mr Knightley, I'm Ivor Novello, I'm Thomas More, I'm hot as fuck and more handsome even. I'm...

I'm the bad Italian spoken by Brits