Things You Never Clean

I clean all of those things, and more.

OMG, Don't ask.

You’d never guess

I clean everything. I took biology in college and frankly, there no going back.

Omg, you have no idea.

Pierre you disgusting pig. Of course I clean all these things. And so should YOU.

[quote]The manual can opener.

Yikes, can't imagine not cleaning that. I keep a toothbrush in the dish drainer mainly for that purpose and clean the can opener's blades after every use.

Moo

In the coming years, it will be up to you to bring a can of Lysol every where you go because America is joining the third world when it comes to filthy public spaces and free-flowing viruses and bacteria.

The standards have gotten so low now that anything goes.

When I polish the floor, I never move the potted tree.

The remotes. Crusted with hand cream, lube, semen, popcorn grease, etc.

From my rueful experiences, apparently wiping their ass after taking a huge, nasty dump. Guess everyone is too busy on their phone to wipe their ass cracks.

Perhaps, R12, they should read the "Bidets" thread.

That part of the toilet on the side and where it bolts to the floor.

I REALLY didn't need THAT picture

Vaginas are self cleaning.

Your iPhone.

I never use the freezer for anything but ice cubes and ice cream, it is otherwise just a really cold trash can. I cook small portions so there are no leftovers.

MY SPHINCTER

I admit, I haven't cleaned the doorbell in a while, but it's winter here, and you can damn well get you and your dirty fingers off my porch! I don't own a corkscrew, but I clean the other stuff regularly.

The floor under the refrigerator.

We will have you know Person-With-A-Vile-French-Name that [italic] we[/italic] the members of Datalounge's Maiden Aunt Brigade, keep our households spotless.

We cannot actually be fraus, so we will out-frau them on all fronts, from our superior potato salad recipes and holiday dinner menus to our more tasteful home decor to the spotlessness of our housekeeping.

We have decided that you are probably the sort of person to engage in hiring someone else to clean for him!

Imagine, letting someone else touch your unmentionables!

Yuck!

The air popcorn popper

The water reservoir of your drip coffee pot

The head liner of your car

R7, George, but do you clean the toothbrush?

My hole

The soap after dropping it. I always rinse it, but that seems to awe others.

Were you taught not to touch any food remnants within the mayo jar when you make a new sandwich? I concluded in adulthood that, if this were truly dangerous, we would all already be dead. It might be gross, but not deadly.

Convince me otherwise.

[quote] The manual can opener.

If you use a smooth-edge type can opener that cuts the side of the can, it never touches the contents in the can, so you don't really have that icky cleaning issue like with the old-fashioned kind that cut into the top of the can.

Many ignore their dirty windows. It's quite sad when there's actually a nice view on the other side of the grime. I strive for outdoors at least four times a year, inside as often as I can. Some friends have fessed up to never cleaning them in years!

I don't clean towels. When white bath towels become uniformly yellow and can no longer absorb water, I throw them out and get new ones.

True story: I worked in PTown years ago as a house frau, long before the business was taken over by the Jamaicans. (This was when it was still college students and vagabonds from the US and Canada, mostly, cleaning guesthouses). This was also before they had a central sewer hook-up. Every place had a septic tank, and it filled with overuse of the laundry washer or other water services. There was one guest house that would inspect their guest’s used towels, and if they looked clean, they’d skip the washer, and just put them in the dryer. Then put them back on the shelf for the next guest.

Many places had automatic lawn watering systems, but the law required that any automatic system had to be well water. If it was tap water, they required hand-watering. They posted signs saying “don’t drink the water”. I learned that they weren’t being cheap, or mean, or whatever; it was that the watering wells were too close to the septic tanks to be safe to drink from, though ok to water the lawn. So, unless you like ecoli with your water, take those signs seriously when you see them. I think town hall has them today.

When I hired my cleaning person, 20 years ago! I asked my Mom, who had 7 kids, and had cleaning help, what she knew about hiring a cleaning person. She said “All I know is that they clean a little less every time they come.” Lol. It’s true!

My sister had an old women who cleaned. The old woman mostly watched TV and napped. My sister had to hire a second cleaner, because for a while, she couldn’t fire the old lady.

[quote]Things You Never Clean

My dick before I stick it in your WHORE mother's mouth.

My butthole.

My hands after I shovel McDonald's in my face

I think it’s due to DataLounge but I now have a year-end chore list of things to do, like change various filters. I didn’t know my vacuum had three filters for maybe a decade. Plus other stuff.

I love clean windows. No matter how nice an apartment I visit, I’m always first drawn to looking out the windows! I even are old fashion with the old storm windows, so it’s a bit of a chore, but I do it every year, or sometimes twice a year.

R30! That's so nasty! Like... bath towels???

Do you really clean your doorbell?

My prosthetic testicle.

My oven. I really should clean it soon.

[quote] If you use a smooth-edge type can opener that cuts the side of the can, it never touches the contents in the can, so you don't really have that icky cleaning issue like with the old-fashioned kind that cut into the top of the can.

I use a side-cut can opener, too. It doesn't leave a perfectly smooth edge on the lid, though. Still, not sure why more people don't use it. So much cleaner than the other kind.

You can put most can openers in the dishwasher.

I have a window cleaner come every two weeks to do the outside and I do the inside with a Karcher window vac. Takes a while though as I have 30+ windows.

What R42 said. I throw my manual can opener in the dishwasher after every use. Is that so hard?? I also throw the kitchen sponges in every time I run it which is usually every other day. Easy.

I don't clean above my kitchen cabinets.

This thread made me get out of bed and spray lysol on every doorknob

Consuela!

I clean all those things. My metal can opener and corkscrew go through the dishwasher.

Once a week I clean my keys, iPhone and wallet with antiseptic spray, I can't imagine what germs are on them.

r32 Always pay attention to what your mother says about the cleaning lady. I lived during my mom's last years and I brought in a cleaning lady, Patricia, to help. My mother watched her with an eagle eye. She followed poor Patricia from room to room. I was so embarrassed, thankfully, I was working in the other room.

At Mother's funeral Patricia asked me, as everyone was leaving, if she could leave, too. I imagined she was traumatized and didn't think she could depart while corpse was still displayed. I told her yes, she could leave but I would love it if she still came once a week.

At first it was horrendous, she addressed me as Doña and asked me to inspect the rooms and wash, etc. I set her at ease and we settled into a more easy-going style. That is, until I found out she stole $5000 through my credit cards.

I had let her go. I felt bad about it.

[quote]You can put most can openers in the dishwasher.

Mine is rusting a little just from being hand washed after use, the dishwasher would turn it into a pile of rust bits in a hot second.

R48 can't come to the phone just now, it's his evening to disinfect the small electronics and personal items.

You type dirty, OP.

I clean all of those things.

OP, honey....

cockrings

[quote] The manual can opener. The corkscrew. The doorbell. The freezer. The water basin container for your Keurig

I would never use a manual can opener (those went out in 1988) or a Keurig. There's no way to get a Keurig completely clean, plus they make shitty coffee that's not hot enough

I always clean my corkscrew

The broiler section of my oven, including the broiler plate.

Keys - good one!

How about the salt and pepper seller? Never, right?

My doctor discovered I had too much iron in my blood test, I had one of those pepper mills that grind the pepper kernels, and it was 30 years old. After I threw it out, my iron level returned to normal, haha. It apparently was bringing the rusting mills-wheels into my food. Yum!

Jockstraps.

I clean under the fridge when it is moved for maintenance. Same with the bed, when, for whatever reason, I move the mattress, I will clean the dust bunnies. I clean under the stove when I replace the mouse traps there. This is every few years. Otherwise, I leave them all unmolested.

Tops of counters every year or so. I have lights up there and glasswork on top that needs to be dusted anyway. It’s amazing how dusty it is up there.

The more you scrub and clean and purify and sterilize the less you'll be able to withstand germs. We evolved for millions of years drinking out of streams where animals piss, shit and die. Eating raw this and unwashed that. Rarely bathing. Humans are tough.

Cash and coins.

If you used canned products..need to clean the tops.

I don't clean. That's Rosario's job.

r63 Not anymore, bitch.

TINAAAA!!

Somebody on DataLounge said that he goes to the grocery market, sticks his finger down his crack, and then wipes it on the tops of soda cans. He didn’t get shit for it, too! Maybe it was too unthinkable for people to respond. But you’ll never look at a soda can the same again.

R55 I use a manual and open about two cans a year.

I avoid canned food so it is no big deal.

Am I the only one that still uses an electric can opener?

Yes, they are a bit pointless if you aren't opening 30 cans a day. (though maybe you have a dozen cats to feed?).

They are up there with Asparagus peelers as one of the most useless pieces of crap you can own

[quote]Am I the only one that still uses an electric can opener?

I've never owned one in my entire life, e mi chiamo Ancientgay. My cats came running when they heard the twirl of a manual. This is the one I used for decades. Now I have an OXO.

Good god, you bitches have no problem sticking your tongue in some shitty hole, or licking cock fresh out of the hole, and you're fussing about can openers?

under my foreskin. I grew quite obese over the years and don’t get any action anymore, so one day I just said fuck it. It’s one less thing to do in the shower. Same with my asshole although at least I do shoot the water from the hand shower up there, that’s good enough. But soap in those areas too much effort since my midsection is so large.

R71 Many of us would never do such a gross thing. Rimmers are minority.

[quote]Many of us would never do such a gross thing. Rimmers are minority.

Ha! And what alternate planet is it that you inhabit?

I had a funny exchange with a dinner guest last night who told me while I was preparing dinner that she routinely cleans her married children’s refrigerators. She took a look at mine and gave me a pass!

My cleaning person cleans THAT, R14.

My cleaning person resume to clean my fridge.

I feel reading this thread will not be good for my OCD

"Am I the only one that still uses an electric can opener?"

No.

I HATE manual can openers and have had an electric one for as long as I can remember.

Okay, I can't remember the last time I used it, but at least it's there.

R79 So, this "thing" sits on your kitchen counter even though you never use it?

I just gave my blender to Goodwill. I never used it, since I bought it in 2007. It cost, maybe $300, and matched my other appliances and the kitchen. It was on my counter for a while, then taking space in my cabinet. I think somebody got a good deal.

The Harriet Craig Memorial To-Do List....by the time you reach the end, you're dead.

“Housework expands to fill the day”

- Some feminist frau

Another oft neglected spot is tops of picture frames, doors and doorframes. I've had to point these out to cleaners over the years. Rads get ignored all the time too, especially if they're concealed in cases.

Winter gloves - how about that one!

R85 I have washed fabric, even wool, but have considered how dirty the suede and leather could be...I don't wish to overthink it!

The mix of dust and grease that furs over the top of the refrigerator.

R79,. I still use mine every day, but yours looks considerably more modern.