FAT WHORES REJOICE! Christmas cookie season is upon us!

Even with the TACKY M&M's those cookies look good. Don't tempt me OP I just weighed myself this morning I'm 259 pounds!

I wish I could find some fantastic gingerbread men cookies or molasses cookies.

I am not a good cook so I am trying to steal all your ideas for Christmas cookies!

It also brings me some sweet nostalgia, since it was something I did with family members no longer here.

I'm a simple classic Chocolate Walnut Fudge kind of gal. Eaten with good hot black coffee I'm in heaven.

R2 Try these. I am an absolute cunt when it comes to ginger/molasses cookies because I find most recipes do not have enough ginger flavor. These do, plus a great texture. They never fail!

Thanks r5 - that recipes sounds tasty.

I have the original Ms. Fields Cookie book. Favorite cookie recipes.

I have the Neiman Marcus Chocolate Cookie Recipe. I got it for only $2.50!

r2, it's really not that hard to make a decent gingerbread. And it's likely to be better than anything you'd buy.

Cue the dollar store fruitcake fan.

Snickerdoodles.

Gingerbread men et al.

Gun cookies(butter cookies)

Russian Teacakes/Snowballs.

Chocolate chip cookies.

Pizzelles. Aniseseed, or vanilla ones filled with chocolate and rolled up like cigars.

All indispensable for the holidays.

[quote]Cue the dollar store fruitcake fan.

It's POUND cake, you fat stupid whore!

Spritz cookies - colored red and green, made with a cookie press

Russian Tea Cakes

Sandbakkels - Delicate cookies pressed and baked in a mold. They can be used for mini tarts or eaten plain

M&M cookies using the Christmas red and green M&Ms, like the OP's picture

Rosettes (deep fried with a Rosette iron and then sprinkled with powdered sugar)

Sugar cookies rolled out and cut into decorative shapes, then frosted.

I make these every year. They're very sweet but I cut it down a little by using unsweetened toasted coconut. I also use the Hershey's dark chocolate chips or the Ghirardelli brand. Nestle chocolate chips are inferior tasting. And you must use real butter, none of this margarine crap.

A Moment on the Lips, Forever on the Hips

OP, you fat type like both your hands are in the cookie jar.

I hate chocolate chip cookies with M&Ms..That is some frau shit!

I love chocolate crinkle cookies, irish whiskey cookies, almond cookies, rugalesch cookies

R16 I don't have a cookie jar, I have a cookie snack purse, thank you very much!

“Don't tempt me OP I just weighed myself this morning I'm 259 pounds!”

Me too; my bathroom scale announces my weight followed by “That’s the way the cookie crumbles, you Fat Whore!”

I got on the scale this morning and Regina George popped up to tell me what the scale said.

[quote]It's POUND cake, you fat stupid whore!

OMG! You are so right, r12. I should have said "Cue the Pound Cake Pundit. Sorry, i blame the blubber!

I offer you my family's prized Oatmeal and Cranberry Cookie Recipe. If you can eat the whole batch, you win a prize! Tee-hee!

Those look delish, R21. Printing now.

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

This batch came out a little bit better.

R14, those look amazing (mainly because I'm high). Are they as easy to make as they sound?

Yes, the M&M cookies are very frau-esque. M&Ms contain very low-quality chocolate. If anything, I’d upgrade the chocolate, since you’re going through the trouble of baking.

Nothing tastes as good as thin.

I learned that on the DataLounge.

R23, i hope you didn't waste those innocent highly-melonated darlings. Those are just crispy and look delish! We all need a little charcoal in our diet, plus, charcoal is effective for whiter teeth.

Pignoli cookies, struffoli and peanut butter fudge.

r27, it's "Nothing tastes as good as thin [italic]feels[/italic] ."

Thank you for the correction, R30!

That should be "nothing tastes as good as heroin feels."

My partner & I decided That we will eat the yummy homemade goodies and also drink what we want until Jan 2. This year I’m baking snickerdoodles, lemon snowballs, millionaire toffee, birthday cake fudge, coconut balls, peppermint bark, raspberry pistachio thumbprints.

I’d like to do a steamed toffee pudding for Xmas has anyone done a British steamed pudding at home?

And look fat on all of those Facebook Holiday photos, R33?

Does Instagram have a fat-reducing filter?

I like pfeffernusse but I don't make them myself

Most of these are just regular, everyday cookies. There's nothing Christmas about them. This is the time of year the german cookbooks come out and we make actual CHRISTMAS baked goods. You lazy bitches need to step up your game. Quit confusing Christmas baking with "usual shit I make for everyday to watch my stories"

[quote]millionaire toffee

I've heard of (and made) millionaire shortbread, but not this. What is it?

I love you guys, especially you Bronze Age Gay.

I'm such a bad cook but I will try a few things, especially some things from childhood that don't require baking, including:

Buckeyes (chocolate and peanut butter)

No bake cookies (cocoa and oatmeal - can also add peanut butter if desired)

And something I can never remember the name of, but you freeze them in a roll and then slice - it also has peanut butter (yes, I'm sensing a theme too)

R18- My mother was making Magic Cookie Bars in the 1970's. I loved them. Butter, Graham Cracker Crumbs, Sweetened Condensed Milk,Sweetened Shredded Coconut, Semi sweet Chocolate Chips, and Slivered Almonds.

R37 not a blog I usually visit but this is the recipe. You may think it’s trashy and I would agree it is, but wow it’s addictive. I like pecans better than almonds on top.

r38 You are so sweet to say so, and because of that you get one of my all-time fave Hollywood tales: It was Miss Tallulah Bankhead, hosting a Christmas party, and, after seeing her guests needs attended to, disappearing into the kitchen. Emerging quite a long time later, bearing a silver tray, upon which rested not quite artistic lumps of charcoal. Circulating among her guests, offering HER version of Christmas cookies, prefacing each invitation to have one by saying "Fuck. Betty. Crocker.!"

That Tallu, what a scamp.

[quote] My partner & I decided That we will eat the yummy homemade goodies and also drink what we want until Jan 2.

I’m glad the 2 of you could 100% agree, as a unit, on the very important decision to eat yummy goodies. Whew, that was a nail-biter.

R2, Multiple recipes and pictures of gingerbread men linked.

R8, Do you mean NM chocolate chip cookie recipe?

R35, Does Trader Joe's still sell them? Had them once and they were so flavorful and soft. They require a lot of expensive ingredients so not really worth it to make them.

Rugelach cookies made with cottage cheese. Allrecipes has other suggestions of filling too.

R33, Lemon snowballs' recipe linked.

Anyone else love rainbow cookies? Recipe linked, video available, pictures too.

I like those pilsburry holiday sugar cookies that you slice and bake. Or those frozen cookie dough balls. You done even have to bake them. Am I trashy?

R46, I would buy tham at my local Acme at this time of year. Archway makes them, probably not the best you can get, but I liked them.

And stollen!

R52 I used to make the czech version of stollen for years. Well, one type was german poppy cake (moehnkuechen). The others were filled with marzipan or prune. Very traditional. I learned the hard way that a stand mixer is only your friend for mixing, not kneading.

The difference between home made and store bought is vast. It's worth the effort despite the high learning curve.

Someone recently gave me this simple recipe for these incredibly good potato chip cookies Five ingredients: Butter, sugar, vanilla, flour, potato chips. The recipe says that they taste like chips, but I disagree.

Here's my adjusted recipe for a toaster oven-sized batch of 6 or 7. The original recipe is attached.

Preheat oven to 350F (or 180C)

Mix:

4 Tablespoons softened butter (1/4 cup)

2 tablespoons sugar (1/8 cup)

1/2 teaspoon vanilla

then mix in:

1/3 cup + 2 Tablespoons flour

1/4 cup crushed potato chips (almost 1 cup before crushing)

Drop by spoonful onto cookie sheet or toaster oven tray. The recipe says to press flat with a sugared fork, but I forgot to do that and they came out fine. About 15 minutes @ 350 or until golden. (13-20 minutes, just keep an eye on them)

r54 I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that Carol is a frau.

[quote] The difference between home made and store bought is vast. It's worth the effort despite the high learning curve.

It is, though I admit to caving and getting Aldi stollen a few times over the years.

Aldi xmas goodies are pretty darned yummy

I want those M & M cookies. They look so yummy and festive.

I made these every year. Simple but so good.

Use good butter...at least Kerry Gold or similar.

No r50 Its the holiday season....make and enjoy what you want

R57, Aldi's needs to expand to more states.

These are AMAZING

butter isn’t vegan r62 is it?

Christmas pudding - the Victorian way!

And traditional gingerbread too.

The hint about rolling the freshly made dough between parchment sheets really works.

Does anyone make nighty-nights? Those have NEVER turned out right for me!

Save it for the Cookie Crawl, OP, you stupid fat whore!

r59 Those are very similar to Russian Tea cakes or Greek kourabidedes. Or "snowball cookies." My family makes a variant of it, but they're very fussy -- must use clarified butter, and no nuts. Just flour, butter, vanilla, and powdered sugar. They're really good, though.

It calls for a butter substitute R63. You would never know it though. They are insanely good.

R67, Nighty-night cookie recipe linked.

R67, Nighty-night cookie recipe linked.

Cook's Country made Laura Bush's Cowboy Cookies on a recent episode. (They won against Tipper Gore's recipe in the Family Circle contest between the wives of presidential candidates in 2000.) They sounded pretty good.

R69 I think every culture has its version . All good, all fatting....... Christ, I hate this time of the year...all I can think about is binging on stuff I would rarely think about any other time.

Agree Aldi has good Christmas cookies and goodies.

Mrs. Crocombe for the win!

These are good=

Cracker Cookies

Ingredients-

1 box Clubhouse or Keebler Wafer Crackers

1 cup (or 2 sticks) butter

1/2 cup granulated sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla

1/2 cup (or more to taste) finely chopped pecans

Line two cookie pans with aluminum foil. Line up crackers in pans, filling them. Sprinkle pecans over both sheets of crackers. Bring butter, sugar, and vanilla to boil in large saucepan. Do not stir. Boil for 1 to 1/2 minutes. Bake in pre-heated 350 degree oven for 10 minutes. Quickly remove from pan and place on waxed paper to completely cool. Store in airtight container.

Bumped!

I made these and they were superb! Chocolate and salted caramel swirled meringues

The trashiest, easiest squares you'll ever make.

I make a bunch of different brittles. Peanut, cashew, pistachio, almond. All good. My stoner friends are always asking for it.

[quote]If you can eat the whole batch, you win a prize!

Is the prize diabeetus?