Tragic George Michael died after 'never recovering from grief'

The singer, who had not yet even admitted to his own family that he was gay, said: “It took about three years to grieve, then after that I lost my mother. I felt almost like I was cursed.”

That “curse” might actually have been a medical condition, believes Dr Papadopoulos, who says the strong indication is that he was a victim of Persistent Complex Bereavement Disorder and was unable to overcome his emotional pain.

The condition, also known as Complicated Grief Disorder, can result in “destructive thoughts and behaviours, such as substance abuse”.

Dr Papadopoulos added: “George basically never recovered from his grief but rather masked it with drugs and anti-depressants.”

Although the much-loved star’s death certificate concluded “natural causes,” it also recorded heart and liver problems.

And one of the world’s top pathologists agrees that they could have been aggravated by his condition.

Dr Michael Hunter, who studied the singer’s medical records, said: “Loneliness triggers greater levels of the stress hormone cortisone in the body and can greatly increase the risk of heart disease.”

George’s prolonged drinking, cigarette and pot smoking and use of powerful narcotics including crack cocaine would also have contributed to the organ damage, he said.

Dr Hunter added: “He had been pushing his body to the limits for more than 20 years.”

In other words, he was a mess?

So sad

BCBD. So tragic.

Don't bereavements happen to most people as they move through life? Not sure how you can turn it into a syndrome though.

He lived his life like a candle in the anus.

George Michael deserves to be remembered for his philanthropy and his incredible gift of music. He was extremely talented.

No one disagrees, R8

A Datalounge Victory.

Sad

R10?

Then why am I not dead?

[quote]The condition, also known as Complicated Grief Disorder, can result in “destructive thoughts and behaviours, such as substance abuse”.

Yes. We know. But we are not resigned and I do not approve. It's not cute to be such a mess and say I can only do meth and be fucked by porn stars and they both must be replenished every few hours. When I come down I'm about to feel very sad but I can't really talk to anyone about it, so I'll just eat and sleep. I'm lucky to have a boyfriend but he's here for my money only because I'm a fat ugly pig who won't leave the house but I am charming several hours a week. I think he steals from me and sells stories to the rags.

I love to sing, it's all I love to do but ever since i've been smoking meth and crack daily and gained 100 lbs I don't sound as good. I must consult more doctors as to why this could be. I miss my old friends but so many are dead that I've lost all feeling for the living. I get that I won't come back from this in a connected way but there are too many hours in the day to remain sober and healthy. I am terrified of dying but this life could kill me. Still I always get better and can try harder tomorrow.

I get that my family and friends love me but unless I feel in control of them I just stay away. I hate pills they don't make me feel lively. I'm stopping drugs and going vegan tomorrow. Princess Diana was so beautiful. All those beautiful boys died of AIDS. And I have some sort of that too. No need to die but what to live for?

Just another little party before then. Fuck it.

R14 = sick troll

No fool. The troll is for thee. Your grief porn is sickening.

It must be real if there is a syndrome named after it

R17 Yes It's real

To suffer chronic depression and also have the condition known as complicated grief disorder it’s a no win situation. Add in years of dealing with your sexuality George didn’t have a chance.

[14] You are one sick puppy

Lord, haven't these celebrities heard of THERAPY?

oh please. so tired of people being like celebrities are so special. he needed to grow up. get some balls, he did not . he chose drugs and sex . so look what happened. boo hoo

R21, therapists (good ones, anyway) don't indulge their clients but challenge them. I imagine that celebrities who are used to being indulged would find this stressful and discontinue therapy.

She was such an amazing person. Life long coke head. Throwing herself out of moving cars. I hope she is in gay heaven with all the other cock suckers.

Gee I thought it was dehydration and exhaustion.

He was a fuckin' weirdo and a junkie. It amazes me why everyone spends so much time overlooking the obvious.

So ... that certainly doesn’t take away from his talent. If anything that added to him being as you put it a weirdo and junkie.

I can relate to him as the last few years have ripped several loved ones from me who were a generation or two older than me and whom I will always miss. And it's unlikely anyone will care for me as they did.

As much as I try to rebuild, part of me wants to fade away and join them in death.

I'm thinking that sometimes you just have to make the decision to be happy. Just decide. Things aren't ever what you hoped they'd be. Not ever, for anybody. The only thing that separates one kind of person from another is there are some who stay angry about it and there are some who... accept what comes their way. —Dialogue from the film, “Away From Her”

That’s easier said than done. I lost my elderly parents, and due to my relationship ending with my partner a few months later the kids refuse to talk to me. I get it. Loneliness is for real. I took care of everyone and now I’m alone. Unfortunately I can relate to George more than I care to admit.

I know the loss of his mother was something he never really got over.

R28 Everyone wishes you would fade away and die. That is a given.

What kind of drugs were in his system when he died?

R28. I am sad to read of your pain. i hope things get better for you

Yes he was a mess- substance abuse, overeating; the works. Probably a fragile fellow with some sort of psych diagnosis or another. None of this takes away from his great talent and musical legacy. I love his music and his voice.

George received a Lifetime Achievement Award in 1989. He was 26 years old when he reached the height of success in the music industry. Too much success, fame, and money too soon led to his problems, his complete lack of perspective in the years before he died.

One of the people George was grieving the loss of was himself. He lost his life to drugs and depression many years before he died.

He was a heavy user of hard drugs for YEARS. His heart and liver just couldn't take it anymore. So sad.

i still dont get it............i miss my mom, i miss my dad, i miss my brother, all dead, and especially my dogs that have passed, i feel pain. but i did not throw my life away with drugs and alcohol. people need to enjoy these people for their talent and then move on. they are not special in anyway and "fans" to me are really just people who have no life of their own. move on

The expectation that everyone should react to circumstance as we would is a futile folly.

His ultimately destructive reaction to his mother's death may seem inexplicable to us or some, but it was genuine for him.

Thank you r34. I'm not even sure it's pain, just a hollow realization? I have a lot of things to enjoy but some people certainly leave big spaces when they depart. I'll bring this up with my therapist.

GM...what a shame he didn't stay with Kenny Goss or find someone else like him.

The problem with big stars like GM, Whitney, MJ is that they were too rich and famous for anyone to really help. Anyone who pushed them with tough love got shut out, so at the end they were surrounded by people who would tell them what they want to hear and give them what they wanted, even if it was killing them. George was given many chances but decided it was easier to get high and crawl inside of his pain. It’s a shame because he was talented and had so much to live for—but don’t we all? Being famous doesn’t make your life more valuable or worthy, so he had the same responsibility that we all do to get our shit together. Unfortunately he chose otherwise. It’s sad because his music is wonderful and he could have done so much more with his talent and fame had he lived longer.. But now when I listen to his songs I also hear a cry for help from someone living in a gilded cage they locked themselves into. Tragic.

[62] So true. George’s music is so telling. He was private in many ways but in his songwriting he was opened, honest and pure. When you listen to Freedom it tells it all. Some mistakes were meant to last. He paid a high price for being so hot and sexy when dealing with his sexuality behind closed doors. It’s too bad George didn’t realize he really wasn’t that chubby little boy with thick glasses and wild curly hair anymore.

You are correct he had so much more to give musically. He was blessed with the gift of music. However, I’m not sure it was a blessing maybe a curse.

Bad things happen. Deal.

Wow [44] your in a pleasant mood today.

R44 True but still very sad :(

R42 I agree. I thought it was telling that Andrew did not show up in his Freedom documentary.

[41] I feel your pain of dealing with lose. Its something I would not wish on anyone. Some people can deal with lose, but for others its like being buried in a dark hole to which you cant get out.

This quote " GM...what a shame he didn't stay with Kenny Goss or find someone else like him". George did Fadi, both men only saw dollar signs when it can to George. Kenny and Fadi only wanted George for his money and fame not the man himself. Its a shame because his friends speak so highly of him. There're no stories of George being difficult or mean to any of his peers and fans yet he chose two slim balls for lovers.

I guess that's why George was madly in love with Anselmo, because he could be Georgios Panayiotou. Not George Michael whom by George's own words he had to be 24 hours a day.

George was in love with the idea of being in love with Anselmo. Yes, I believe he loved Anselmo, however, they were not together long enough to experience the trials and tribulations of a true relationship. Once Anselmo hook ill that changed everything. After Anselmo no one could live up to George’s expectations of what a true lover was. There is nothing like the first time you fall in love.

R48: you are spot on. That relationship never got off the ground or became real. I think it messed him up along with his mother dying.

^i meant r49.

R48 I'd never heard anything bad about Kenny Goss, only good. What a shame that wasn't good for GM either. It does seem all his partners lived in Anselmo's shadow and that was not a longstanding rship before the illness took hold. GM never seemed open to having a second great love, even at such a young age.

[R52] George Michael’s former partner Kenny Goss opened up to The Sun in, not one, but six (6) stories about the late singer’s preferred home life, drug addiction, and funeral. In an ironic twist of fate, The Sun is a publication owned by Rupert Murdoch’s News International, which George Michael previously claimed to have tried to destroy him. The late George Michael’s feud with The Sun’s owner Rupert Murdoch is well-documented In this 2011 tweet, he expressed his animosity towards News International:

George Michael ✔ @GeorgeMichael News International's targets to have genuinely benefitted from Murdoch's attempts to destroy me.

[R52] In the first story, Kenny claimed that he “flushed George’s drugs down the loo” in an attempt to end the singer’s crippling addiction. Kenny described the situation as: I would find drugs and flush everything down the toilet, thinking, ‘If I just get rid of it he won’t get more’. He was absent-minded, so would just think he’d lost them.

In the second article, Kenny described his home life with George revealing how late singer watched Corrie in his pajamas, drank PG Tips and loved Ben and Jerry’s. He described their days as:We’d get up at about 9am and spend two or three hours chatting. We would be in our Gap pajamas, flannel ones that his sister Melanie bought us for Christmas. They had tops but we didn’t wear the tops.

We would wear them all the time, with no shoes. George would have a cup of PG Tips tea with one sugar and a bowl of children’s type cereal like Coco Pops. Then we’d gossip about things we heard, discuss news, world events. George was really smart.

The third article focused on the funeral of George Michael, where Kenny revealed that Fadi Fawaz delayed the star’s funeral. He said in his interview, “I have no idea why Fadi would choose to be late for the funeral.” (the family wanted to keep these details secretly). In the fourth story, Kenny “reveals all on singer’s notorious arrest for sex act in LA toilet.” He talked about how he got the funds for George’s bail:

I had to go to all these cash machines to get all this money for bail. I think it was about $2,000. It is hard at that time of day getting that kind of money out of cash machines but I did it.(That was George's money by the way).

In an interview with Dallas News in February, Kenny Goss described George Michael as “truly the love of my life. And I think I was the love of his life.” It is with great irony today that he decided to sell out his story to the publication that George Michael hated the most, but probably bid the highest for his stories.

An interesting interview concerning George Michael by Toby Bourke.

R48 I agree. I believe he hyper idealized Anselmo to the point that everyone and everything paled by comparison.

If Anselmo had lived, who knows if they would've stayed together. GM absolutely idealized that relationship because they were only together for a short time before Anselmo died. And GM was no stranger to drugs before that, either. The drug use started long before.

Of course, the number of 80s pop stars who DIDN'T have drug problems could probably be counted on one hand.

I love GM’s music but personally he was an extremely dysfunctional person who, like Whitney, Prince and Michael, had too much money to hit rock bottom and get help he needed. They all had too many people enabling they unhealthy lifestyle and the people who tried to help them got shut out. I hate to say it, but I made sure to see him in concert because I seriously doubted he’d be with us long. It was inevitable based on the way he lived. He had many chances. Poor George. May he Rest In Peace.

The body language in O.P.'S pic suggests that they were not close. (Not THAT day, at least.)

Rob Stringer, Sony Music Boss, speaks openly regarding George Michael’s career after the Sony lawsuit.

(R58) I agree that George was highly dysfunctional. I have compassion towards him because I think he was basically a very good person. At the same time I'm mad at him too for the lost life he threw away taking his talent with him. How anyone could think smoking 25 joints a day is okay is beyond me. He smoked cigarettes for years so between the two it's almost as though he was daring himself to destroy his voice. At least that never happened so it's lucky for the public in that regard. Just a massive loss of talent and forever the question of what might have been had he lived for another 20 years or more. He took all the music yet to come to his grave. It's just sad.

If someone in Michael's situation never recovers from the death of a mother or a lover... I speculate that it's because they've lost the ability to form new attachments.

And IMHO that's partly because anyone who wants to make it to the top or survive at the top has to do a lot of mistrusting, and partly, it's self-imposed. Anyone who lives surrounded by paid toadies and fellow celebrities they don't actually like and avoiding contact with normal people because of snobbery or fear of fannish gushing... is going to find themselves lonely and isolated before long. Like Michael Jackson lonely and isolated, the kind where there's no contact with anyone who will tell you anything you don't want to hear, nobody around that isn't completely under one's control. How do you make new friends then, when every potential friendship is valued on the scale of celebrity or social usefulness? How do you fall in love, when you're used to mistrusting anyone who isn't completely under your control, and despising anyone who is?

I'm convinced that being famous is incredibly bad for a person's mental health, particularly if one is stupid enough to live out the popular idea of the celebrity life. And that's without even mentioning drugs.

(R55) That's a very sad interview with Burke. I wish I could say I didn't believe what he said but I know it's all true. Burke was right about George's life being at risk. The most gifted people always seem to be profoundly screwed up.

i loved his music. I was so sad about hie he died and his pattern of self destruction but beautiful souls don't want to live here on earth

Well, self-indulgent and self-destructive souls don't get long stays here on Earth.

It's pretty hard to overcome almost any psychological problem when layered with substance abuse. Have to get that out of the way first, then deal with the issues. Great talent. Love his music and voice.

He couldn’t move on after 20 years?

Horse manure.

This is so sad. Grief affects people in different ways, R67. Hope you never have to experience a devastating loss to find out. x

(R64) I think there is truth in what you said about beautiful souls not wanting to live on earth. George is much like the jazz pianist Bill Evans who also self destructed and could not handle the death of two people closest to him. For years there was a local doctor in my area who was well known for lecturing patients on the old "pull yourself up from your bootstraps" if they were going through hard times in their lives. That lasted as long as nothing terrible directly happened to him. Once it did he put a gun to his head and pulled the trigger. I'll never judge George for not being able to overcome the two loses in his life. It's simply how it was for him and most unfortunate that he was so heavy into drugs.

(R62) Much wisdom in your comments. It is the same pattern over and over in these celebrity deaths. I always thought George did better than most in not believing his own press. For so many they start to see themselves as Gods because everyone keeps telling them they are. Hero worship is not good for anyone.